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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

being alone during induction

26 replies

madeindevon2 · 31/05/2007 18:51

ok. i thought you would be able to have your birth partner (dh) with you during induction and labour but been reading/hearing that they send partners home after normal visiting hours. so you just get left alone? and dh might miss the birth? is this true?

OP posts:
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PrettyCandles · 31/05/2007 18:53

Induction can take a long time to get going. Once you're in actual labour your partner will be able to stay with you throughout, just as in spontaneous labour.

CarGirl · 31/05/2007 18:55

yes if things start happening they phone them asap. Two of my inductions took FOREVER so glad he could go home!

GColdtimer · 31/05/2007 19:08

My DH went home after I had the gel and nothing seemed to be happening (went in at 4PMm he left at 11PM). He came back at 7AM and DD wasn't born until 10 that night but he stayed with me all of that day. For other people Inductions work really quickly and in that case he would stay/they would phone him to get back to you.

I have a tip. If nothing but mild contractions (and if they tell you they are mild, they are mild, even though they may not feel like it!) happen try to get as much rest as you can. I didn't and ended up exhausted before I even really got going!

americantrish · 31/05/2007 19:25

i was induced at 11am, ds born at 5.37pm. Dh was allowed to stay with me and ds til about 10pm, an hour after visiting hours. i would see what the hospital says about it. (i cant imagine they would send the father home in the middle of the night!)

aquababe · 31/05/2007 19:28

I had mean midwives who didn't call my partner the first two times I requested as they didn't think I was progressinbg enough for him to be called.
I wanted him there to help me be strong and articulate what I wanted not just to see his dd being born.
I hated it.
I doubt they'd miss the birth though

shonaspurtle · 31/05/2007 19:33

Luckily we live very close to the hospital as bloody dh didn't hear the phone when they called him at 2am and they just left an answering machine message!

It wasn't until I started screeching where's dh where's dh that I found this out and got them to ring his mobile. Ds was born about 3 hours later so it wasn't hugely urgent but it meant I was on my own for most of it.

MissGolightly · 31/05/2007 19:33

usually if it's your first baby they put a gel in the night before and you get either nothing or twinges overnight, then they put another one in early in the morning and that kickstarts the process properly. Sometimes you need a third gel and/or a drip.

So basically there's a lot of waiting about and you'd do better to spend the night sleeping (as would your partner). If by any chance anything does happen your partner gets called immediately, and of course they can come back in the mornign whether or not you are in labour.

shonaspurtle · 31/05/2007 19:35

I think it's because they keep you on the antenatal ward until labour is established. Your partner can be with you as soon as you get sent to the labour suite.

USAUKMum · 31/05/2007 19:56

at the hospital I went to, they do inductions on the labour ward and DH was with me the whole time. Induction started at 1pm, DS born at 8:30pm (same day) -- but then I have fairly fast labours (DS was born 40 min after waters broke).

We did walk around the hospital a lot, I had to come back every 1 1/2 hrs to be monitored.

So depends on the hospital -- unless that is what they have told you at your hospital.

utterlyconfused · 31/05/2007 20:00

I went in at 4pm, had the gel, and dh went home. We weren't expecting anything to happen until the next day. I was fully dilated by midnight and dh arrived about half an hour later. Fortunately I was pushing for over 4 hours so he didn't miss out!

StinkyPete · 31/05/2007 20:02

i had two inductions; they took sooo long, dh didn't miss a thing.

mandymac · 31/05/2007 20:03

My induction was started in the morning and as nothing much happening when visiting finished at 9pm, DH was sent home and I was on a ward.
I then proceeded to go into full labour pretty quickly, but they didn't really believe me. I went through whole dilating stage on my own! It wasn't good. DH was called finally at about 3pm as they shoe horned me into a wheelchair to go down to the labour suite. I was in transition by the time he got there.

I am still fairly about it all (can you tell?).
But he was there in plenty of time for the birth.

oooggs · 31/05/2007 20:07

I was induced 9 weeks ago at 38 weeks. Went to hospital on my own for 8.30am. Pessary in at 9am, chatted on mumsnet most of the day.
Sweep at 4.30pm, waters went at 5pm, dd born at 8.50pm & ds2 at 9.09pm.

DH popped in at 4.20pm then again at 4.40pm with ds. Took ds home at 5pm when waters went and came straight back.

It can take a while

divastrop · 31/05/2007 20:27

my last 3 inductions took 3 days each,and i had told dp that it would take ages and he didnt need to be there the whole time,but he was there during all visiting hours and was very stressed and fed up by the time i got taken to labour ward for ARM.

in the hospital here inductions are started on the maternity ward and you are taken to labour ward when you are in established labour,or they have to break your waters or whatever.

aintnomountainhighenough · 31/05/2007 21:26

Agree with lots of other posters, it can take a while. To be honest I was glad when DP went home, I needed some rest and so did he. Having said that when things when a bit pear shaped they were very quick to phone him and it was only a 10 minute journey to the hospital.

TuttiFrutti · 31/05/2007 21:56

Completely true madeindevon, all of this can and does happen sometimes. With my first baby I was induced at 9pm, labour kicked off immediately but nobody would believe me, my dh was sent home as visiting hours were over and I was left on my own all night pacing up and down a corridor. My dh didn't miss the birth, but this does happen.

When I was on the antenatal ward before having my second baby, the lady in the bed next to me was being induced. The midwives kept telling her she wasn't really in established labour and sent her dh home after visiting hours. She gave birth before he could get back there.

bookwormmum · 31/05/2007 22:19

My induction was at 6am and I was in established labour by 10am . My dd was delivered at 1.33pm so it took roughly 7.5 hours from start to finish.

baffledbb · 31/05/2007 22:38

My experience was pessary at 4pm, nothing happening until around 10.00pm. Pains started, i paced about went to the shower, paced about some more. Asked for painkillera was given two solpadeine which I took and puked up. It was now around 2am. I asked to be examined and was told that nothing was happening. The midwive suggested i had a bath, she accompanied me there and helped me fill it. I stayed in it for TWO hours, counting to try and get through the pains. Nobody came to check on me in that time. i left the bath, went back to the ward and managed to sort of doze for about an hour. By 6am I was pacing the corridor again. At around 7.30/8.00 I rang for attention again, I was told the midwives were in handover and to wait. Breakfast was brought to the ward where upon I grabbed a kidney dish and ran out into the corridor as I didn't want to be sick in front of the other women in the ward. Evetually one of the midwives came to examine our ward. she started on the other side, kept getting called out, and came to me last (out of the four) - nothing happening with the other three, me four centimetres dilated and a sudden dash to get me gas and air and down to the labour ward. it just so happened that at that moment DP arrived (as we live very close to the hospital he was there 1st thing). DD was eventually delivered by emergency CS later that day.
The point I am trying to make in a longwinded way is that yes you may have to go though stuff on your own that is not very pleasant (short of your DP missing the birth) that you would have been supported through by your partner if you had gone into spontaneous labour at home.

worleyhurley · 31/05/2007 22:56

with ds1 i was induced before dp could get to the hospital ( i had been in a while i had eclampsia) but nothing happend so when it was time for the next pessary HE decided he didnt want to be there, so hid behind the curtain. that was at 4 pm by 11.30 nothing had happend so i was booked in for a c-section the next day, and dp sent home, by midnight i was having major contractions and they had to call dp back although he hadnt even got home so as no one answered the phone they didnt try again, it wasnt till i played up they tried again, and so he came back pretty quick and i had ds1at 3 am.

with ds2 i had a sweep, nothing happened, do was induced with pessary in the eve (they sent dp home) i had contractions all night and didnt dilate, so was induced again in the morning, (again dp hid behind the curtain) still nothing by 7pm so they broke my waters, made me walk around the room, and by midnight had to be put on a drip, 2 hours 50 mins fomr being wired up i had ds2.

i think if you want dp/dh there you have to put your foot down, it seems to be most hospitals policies to send the other half home, but this is when i needed him most when i was getting contractions and not dialting, no wonder i was knackered after no sleep for 2 days...

FirstAtForty · 31/05/2007 23:28

I had similar experience to Mandymac, induced at 5pm, DP sent home at 9pm, went into labour (with serious hitting a brick wall contractions) about 11pm, DD born 4.30am.

My advice is if you get very strong contractions on the ward then make sure you're actually having the contraction when you go along the corridor and tell the midwife, and don't hold back on any expressions of pain or they may not believe you're properly in labour and tell you to go and make a cup of tea or have a 'relaxing bath' in which case you will probably be on your own. Insist on being examined if the contractions suddenly get really painful - I was fobbed off and left alone in the coffee room and then the bath until I was 5cm and really very distressed, because the midwife said I didn't 'look as if I was in labour'.

I think that it does usually take longer for the induction to work which is why she was sceptical. There was no danger though that DP would have missed the birth, it still took about 4 hrs from 5cm dilation to DD being born.

On the plus side it was all over reasonably quickly

lazyemma · 01/06/2007 09:36

you might be like me - I had a pessary at 6pm and my baby was born at 12:15am Partners had to leave the wards at 10pm - I was having strong, regular contractions in the bath by 9pm and was finally examined by a midwife at 10ish (after several hours of "no, you're not in labour, these are prostin pains") by which time I was 5cm dilated and me and my husband got to accompany me down to the labour suite.

madeindevon2 · 01/06/2007 17:48

induction booked in for tuesday. i SOOOO hope i can manage to go into labour naturally before then.
i was so looking fwd to labouring at home, then birthing centre for last bit but im DREADING induction of labour in hospital.

OP posts:
indiasmum · 01/06/2007 18:11

i was induced twice. both times, at end of visiting hours dh had to go home even though i was contracting (v painfully i might add!) every 3 minutes. but was not yet at the magical 3 cm. laboured on my own in a ward with other pregnant women, but within the hour i felt it was much worse and they examined and said i was 5cm and could go to delivery suite where they called dh. but... his phone wasnt working and somehow i managed to think enough tto get them to call my mum and dad to come over to our house to wake up dh and look after kids. dh evntually arrived at hospital to be told by night porter to run. he arrived just in time! dd was born 20 minutes later!!!! but to be fair it did move quickly that time! with ds1 it was similar, dh was sent home, an hour later he was called back in but i didnt deliver til the following teatime. i wasnt in 'established labour' but was in agony and was in a side room on my own so i think they were happy for him to come in and relieve them of listening to me moaning and crying!!!!

Klaw · 01/06/2007 18:51

Madeindevon2, unless there's valid medical reason that baby NEEDS to be out you are allowed to refuse their kind 'offer' of induction. Being 40+10 (or whatever) is not a valid medical reason in itself.

You can wait for spontaneous labour with Expectant Management on a daily basis, ie scans for fluid levels, checks on baby and you to ensure that you are both happy waiting. This also is a good idea if your scan brought your edd forward from your own dates so there is a discrepancy between dates.

Many women naturally carry their babys to 42 or even as far as 44 weeks.

If you do go in on Tuesday it's a good idea to know that a Bishops Score of 9 or more is best for induction, so if it's less ask to discuss your options further.

You might want to consider some Natural Induction methods in the mean time, although I wouldn't recommend Castor Oil and you have to eat a truck load of Pineapples to get enough of the enzymes, so it's not a great idea!

I recommend brisk walking to get baby to put enough pressure on cervix to get it to start and sex and nipple stimulation because the natural hormones released in sex are the ones required in labour, so they are safe!

Good luck!

lazyemma · 01/06/2007 19:28

madeindevon, if you do end up having an induction, it needn't be something to be dreaded. I know it's not an ideal situation, but mine was a very positive experience, with a straightforward labour and delivery. I hope that yours will be too, whatever happens.