How fast - best guess? And what to do with DD if it's super-speedy?

[neolara]

I know this has been asked a million times, but I didn't take any notice before and now I'm 32 weeks and begining to panic.

My first labour was four and a half hours from first twinge to DD being born. On my hospital notes, the labour was considered to be only three hours. The second stage took an hour and a half because I had absolutely no urge to push and only did so because the midwife told me to. I therefore imagine that if I had had an urge to push, it might have been even quicker than that. So.... the question is, has anyone had a similar experience, and if so, how fast was your second birth?

Which brings me to the next question. What do you think I should do with DD if it is super-quick? (My midwife has said that the whole labour could take another four hours but it could all be over in 20 minutes!) I live only about 5 mins from the hospital, my husband works 20 mins away and I have lots of friends locally. This is all great if I could rely on the labour being at least two hours long. But I feel I need to plan for what to do if it only takes a hour. E.g. Assuming it all kicks off in the day time, even if DH drives like a maniac - 25 mins for DH to get back from work, 10 / 15 mins to drive DD to a friend, 10 mins / 15mins to get back from friends house, 10 mins to get to hospital and it could all end up in giving birth in the hospital car park. Do you think it is reasonable to ask people (who all have their own toddlers/ babies) to come to our house? This might save a bit of time but I feel bad asking. What about if it happens in the middle of the night? I would certainly consider a home birth, but then what do I do with my toddler while that is all happening? (again, with the constraint of it being possibly a very short labour). What do you think about a two and a half year old watching their mum give birth? (Not my prefered option, but feel need to consider all possibilities?)

Sorry, this has turned into an major essay! Any suggestions gratefully received.

Doh! meant to say that yes i would ask someone to come to your house instead,it will make it easier for you.

I have been in exactly that position
my labour with dd1 was classed as 4 hours 30 so the consultant said to me that dd2's birth would either be about the same length of time or quicker .Well too bloody right it was quicker 55 mins!
I ended up screaming at dp down the phone to get home as things had started and by the time he arrived back 10 mins later with dd2 i was in transition ,luckily my parents live nearby so they flew up to grab dd1 and 10 mins later dd2 was born on my bathroom floor and dp had to deliver.We live 30 mins away from the nearest hospital with facilities so there was no time .
My midwife said that if i had another that i would have to have a planned home birth as it would probably be very quick.

I'm having another homebith for this very reason Neo.

Ds3 birth was 2hr 16 mins on my notes so theres no way i'm going to risk getting to the hospital in time. We live about 11 miles from the hospital and mid january on the South Downs is not somewhere I want to have this baby.

Thanks everyone for your ideas. Don't know why I hadn't thought of asking someone to come and collect DD from our house instead of us going to them. Am also relieved that everyone seems to have such positive stories / feelings about home births. I think this may be the way we end up going. Will also stock up on Bob the Builder DVD's as he is the current love of DD's life and would probably keep her glued to the telly for several hours.

I am also going for a home birth, mainly due to child care and lack of it, plus had a fairly quick first labour (less than 12 hours, went from 6cm to 10cm in an hour, and then was only a 15 minute second stage) and have had over 5 weeks of contractions which my midwife has just told me will probably leave me looking at a 2 hour max active labour - though we will see!

Good luck whatever you decide

absolutely agree with everything princess pea head has said!

go for a home birth..then no stress about not making it to the hospital...or delivering in the car!! and i would be there like a shot if my friend needed me in the middle of the night! home birth as safe, if not safer than hospital..you will feel safe & secure and will have a lovely relaxed birth

..it sounds like the stress of making arrangements is more worriesome than the birth itself... so remove that stress by having a home birth!

oh by the way people LOVE being called in the middle of the night to help when a new baby is on the way - it is all so exciting and makes them feel part of it and useful, I wouldn't worry about that bit at all, honestly. Whether it is at home or at hospital.

Imagine the joy of running to a friends house in the middle of the night, and having all the excitement of the birth, but without any of the pain! Fabulous. Call me, I'll do it!

Your hour and a half second stage will probably be 5 mins this time. So I think you have to assume that the whole thing might be very quicK! Have it at home - if you have it at night then that is perfect - your dd will be asleep and you can wake her up when it is all over to meet the new one (or leave her to sleep and present her with a baby in the morning)

I had two fast-ish home births (planned) after two hospital births - in both cases I went into labour after the children were in bed and had the babies before midnight.

My midwife told me that I'd go into labour at a time most convenient for me and I thought she was nuts but she was right!!!

If it is in the night wouldn't your toddler sleep through it? I had a homebirth with DD and DS was babysat by the Tweenies. Not the original plan but my PILs didn't arrive in time (they live an hour away). That was my fault though for not getting DH to ring them earlier because I had 4.75 hour labour. It depends on the child though because DD would not sit and watch tweenies for 20 mins like DS did. My friend gave birth in the entrance to the hospital - but we live a good half hour drive away from the hospital in clear traffic.

Bloody hell Neolara, I was worried about this and my first labour was 32 hours - no wonder you're worrying

I posted about it and the most useful piece of advice I was given was that if you ask several people to help and make it clear that they're not the only one being asked so they can say no if they feel like it, people feel under less pressure and don't mind volunteering.
I have been amazed how willing people are to help.

I think a lot of MNers have positive experiences of home birth in this situation (toddler sleeping through it all etc).

Difficult one, I have a friend who had a five hour labour and has been warned that it could be halvf that next time. I have promised her that I will take her little boy day or night and I really don't mind doing this I am sure if you ask people will be delighted to help.

My sister had her second at home and a friend came to get the first abo-ut 6am(of course if it all happens in the middle of the night then childcare is not an issue!). If you are thinking about a home birth I had one and can highly recommend it.

have no idea how fast second will be as my Ds was 90mins from first pain to being born..however when I had DD last year she took 8hrs to arrive so have no idea at all about what to expect with DB[am also 32wks]. Could you not arrange with potential carers of DD for them to collect her from your house??? Or to drop her on the way to hospital. Just have her bag ready to go aswell as yours,