10.6 pound (4.8kg) birth story

[Barbamamama]

My LO is 10 months and I have just registered to see someone at my hospital to go over my birth story as, although I have honestly never been happier and have a happy healthy baby who I adore, I do feel that the birth is hanging over me like a black cloud.
I hope this post isn't too self indulgent as it will be therapeutic for me to write it all down, but I would also like to hear people's responses and stories (esp from other people with big babies) to gauge how 'bad' my birth was.

So… as soon as my midwife began measuring my bump I was always 1cm over, this was always closely followed by "but this is not an accurate way of measuring the baby and you are very tall (5'11") so it's probably nothing to worry about…

I had a scan at around 7 months due to a low lying placenta (which had moved out of the way by then so all was looking good) However, the approximate weight of the baby at this stage was 6 pounds (2.7 kilo). Although my initial glucose test results were fine, it was recommended that I have the full GTT test at the hospital anyway as I was measuring over and they thought I may have gestational diabetes. These results were also fine and I was told, again, there is no accurate way of measuring the baby's size and I am big so there is probably nothing to worry about… but I was warned of the risk of shoulder distosia in big baby's and it was recommended that I come back 1 week before my due date to be measured up again.

SO, I went back to the hospital to be seen on the Monday (I was due on the Friday) and they measured my bump with a tape measure, I think I was 2cm over at this stage. They did not offer me another scan as they said scans can be 15% inaccurate either way when gauging the baby's weight so there was no point in having a scan. They recommended that I have a sweep and was induced on my due date. I had the sweep and made the appointment and went away feeling very confused, I had repeatedly been told that all the measurements they were doing were inaccurate and that I was big etc. so it was all probably fine and I did not want to go through the ordeal of being induced for nothing.. So I went back for a 2nd opinion on the Wednesday and saw a Dr who was higher up and asked for some straight answers and advice, he said that he strongly recommended that I was induced on my due date so the baby did not get any bigger and gave me another sweep in the hope that a natural labour would happen before my appointment on the Friday morning… it did not!

So Friday morning came and cut a loooong story as short as possible. I had 4 pessaries over the next 4 days, all of which did nothing at all, baby was NOT budging. By Sunday evening I was still in the 'waiting ward' where you are induced and had been told that if I was still only at 1cm they would pop my waters, I had been warned that this can be very painful so was feeling pretty fed up and terrified.
To make matters worse, the ward for new mothers was full so the entire ward other than me was suddenly filled with new mothers with their baby's and husbands and extended families of visitors, it was PACKED and I was hiding behind my curtains in tears at the thought of having my waters popped surrounded by a room full of celebrating strangers. My husband called a midwife over and she was really apologetic and reassuring and said right we are moving you upstairs NOW. This was great news, I was moved into my own room upstairs and was assured there would be a bay by morning (it was 6pm now).

The midwife that took over at this stage was the most positive and amazing woman I have ever met and I still think of her all the time. She completely talked me round and geared me up and I felt fantastic and determined. They broke my waters, contractions started and she told me her shift was finishing but as long as my contractions started on their own now I would not be put on the drip that forces unnatural contractions and would be free to move around etc etc.

This is where the black cloud comes in… my lovely midwife finished her shift and contractions were becoming stronger, I was thrilled I would not be put on the drip!! Then… my new midwife started her shift. This is where my memory becomes distorted and I honestly cannot tell if this woman was terrible or if it was my perception of her in the situation I was in. She walked in and said, right so we're putting gyou on the drip now, I protested and said I had been told that if contractions had begun on their own this would not be necessary, she looked me up and down and said I didn't "look like I was in enough pain" and proceeded to put me on the drip. I was so gutted, partly because she made a complete hash of it and blood spurted out of my hand, it was really painful and messy and bruised. I was now wired up to 2 machines and unable to pace around the room or change position. I was stuck on my back on the hospital bed and have never felt worse in my life. The drip made the contractions incredibly painful and I kept asking her to examine me but she kept saying i did not look like I was in enough pain and that I wasn't even nearly there yet. This made me furious. I didn't want to scream and shout my way through the pain, I didn't want to make noise I just wanted to breathe my way through it and try and separate myself from the situation mentally. I ended up feeling like I had to scream and yell the place down just to get them to look at me.

Then… then she went downstairs to sleep for an hour. I am not kidding. SHe got a lower member of staff to sit with me and cover her but she went off for a fucking sleep. The girl she left me with did not seem to have the authority to examine me or proceed with anything so we just had to wait for her to come back. By this stage I had had pethadin and was hoofing down the gas and air like there was no tomorrow. As soon as she came back in they whispered to each other in the corner and she said, ok I think I had better examine you sooner actually and I was 8cm. All I wanted to do was push and the pain was incredible tense like a burning sensation rushing through my whole body. She told me I would not be able to push for at least another 4 hours so I said I needed an epidural.

The woman that gave me my epidural did not normally give them to women in labour, she had been called in from another dept as all of the labour anethiests were busy. This woman was TERRIFIED she was shouting, shaking and kept saying she wasn't going to be able to do it and it was so so scary. The midwife actually apologised when she left the room as she had made it so dramatic. After this everything calmed down, my husband was able to sleep for four hours while we waited until I was able to push and I just chatted to the midwife.

6am finally came, she examined me and I was 9cm so I was finally able to start pushing. The epidural had been so strong that I had no idea when I was contracting or not so the midwife had to tell me when to push. I had been told I had 2 hours to push the baby out myself with out further intervention so I WENT for it! An hour and a half passed and despite being told I was pushing really hard and well, the baby did not seem to be moving down. At this point the room filled with people and I was given papers to sign, my husband was given scrubs and I was told that I would be taken to theatre for further examination, they would try and use either forceps or ventuse.

Once they had numbed me from the neck down and examined me I was told "there is no way on earth this baby will fit out the front door! it's absolutely huge!" and so they went for cesarian. I felt fine by this point, I was exhausted and off my head on drugs but felt relieved that I was finally going to meet my baby. All I thought was I'm falling asleep, how can I be falling asleep when I'm about to meet my child?
At this point the doctor leaned over the cloth and spoke directly to me for the first time. He said "the baby has moved to far down and we are having difficulty pulling him out (through c section) This is now becoming complicated".

All I could hear after that was a huge cerfuffal and tugging and pulling and "Oh my god he's like a WRESTLER!!" The lightheartedness of this comment made me really relieved as I felt it could not be serious if they were joking. As they pulled him out they were joking and making bets on his weight, which was 10 pound 6 oz (4.8 kg).

I felt so euphoric at this point but I just kept falling asleep and when they put the baby on me I had to ask my husband to hold it as I could not move my body and was slipping in and out of consciousness and was terrified I would drop it. We were all moved into the recovery room at this point and I just remember them shaking me and calling my name and the sound of an alarm going off followed by "it's fine, you're just so tired you're forgetting to breathe". I was so scared that I did not fall asleep until the following evening. BUT it was the happiest few days of my life just cuddling and gazing at my little boy.

Ok I could go on and talk about how I was sent home the following day but I will stop there as this is a ridiculously long post… if anyone is still reading I would really appreciate any thoughts on this. Thanks.

Yes to speaking to someone.
I'm shocked they let you go past term so much.
My ds3 was 10 lbs 7. they knew from 34 weeks that he'd be a whopper and I was terrified as I'd never had any interventions with my other 2 births. They were big babies too though so that certainly helped me to deliver the whopper naturally at 40+5 when they induced me to stop him growing any more.
Sorry you were let down.
Congrats on your baby

you're story sounds quite a bit like mine. I had a 10.5lb baby after a failed epidural, too. unlike you, I wasn't earned that having your waters broken could make things more painful. the mw broke my waters, then fucked off for four hours and left me without any pain relief.

I had been having contractions for almost 50 hours at this point but was only at 3-4cm. . I'd been labouring in the antenatal waiting room for some hours, then on post natal for more hours, because I was in for a scan (14d overdue). I had been booked for a homebirth, . but they found my fluid levels were low so wouldn't let me go home.

I laboured while waiting for registrar, was not offered any water outer food for about 8 hours. when a bed became free in post natal I was taken there, hooked up to a monitor where it seemed baby's heart rate was worryingly high -dehydration, they suggested. no shit! I've been left in antenatal for hours without access to water and weeing was really bloody painful anyway.

after waters were broken (50 hours into labour) I went through mind-altering pain. I lost all sense of where I even was in the room. I would squeeze my eyes shut, be hanging off DH yet when I opened then again be shocked at where I was. The pain was all in my pelvic floor region and contractions were peaking fire fat longer than a minute. these were holding me in a vice for 7m or longer, no break in between.
after 3.5 hours of going out of my mind I begged dh to get the midwife. I had reached breaking point. must be transition, right?

I was examined and found to be 3-4cm still. my world fell apart. how could THAT have achieved nothing at all?!
mw suggested we try g&a. I scoffed but actually it did hero. I was awake to be in the room again, able to understand what people were saying to me, able to be present. sui I continued on g&a for a while. still no progress so synto drip suggested. I was so exhausted I agreed. but I had read synto makes for more painful contractions. I thought: more painful than what I experienced earlier? I didn't even know I could FEEL that much pain and not pass out. no way can I take anything more painful than that. so I insisted on an epidural FIRST.
grumpy anaesthetist fine on, says he was about to finish his shift but mw makes him do it anyway.
bum goes warm and searing pain in pelvic floor goes. great. now though, I have pain in my abdomen. I soldier through it but then adj the mw of I could possibly be allowed to have the gas back. she then realised it hadn't really worked. a new anaesthetist comes in with a can of cold spray. epi only made my bum, toes and knees numb. he said the needle had come out, so resited it. that also failed so he added more fentanyl straight in. thus brought the numbness up to my thighs but I could still feel the pain in my belly.
he offered to completely redo the epi but I said no, g&a was doing me ok.
I reached 2nd stage, but needed the gas to help meet push. . I tried without, but the pain was too distracting. so I pushed better with it.
after 1.5 hours, the drop ran out but the mw suss not change the bag, so my contractions stopped. . I was pushing but without any contractions to assist. obstetrician was called in. he said: 1 more hour of pushing, then forceps.
I pushed like billy-o but had only 1 contraction in an hour. I was also exhausted - nearly 70 hours of labour so far.

next thing I remember is seeing theatre lights. I was clutching the gas canister and refusing to let go. anaesthestist told me he would do a spinal. I was convinced or would not touch this pain, the epi didn't, after all.
but with the cold spray he was able to assess and indeed it did with. bliss!
forceps, episiotomy, catheter fell out (shocked the mw) pph and a baby. I held my breath -so much had gone wrong, what next? but the baby cried. it was a boy. 10lb 5oz.
I didn't a while in post op, weak, then taken to post natal.

catheter fell out again, replacements kept leaking and I had no bladder control.

I was too weak to eat. after some hours, dh helped me shower. catheter fell out again. I had zero bladder control and no one understood why.

I was kept in for a week while they checked and scanned but everyone was mystified. hospital had too few adult nappies for me wear. one mw actually went out and bought some for me.
it took months due bladder control to return. weeks before I could walk more than ten minutes from home. very traumatic.

I'm only just beginning to come to terms with what happened. I'm pregnant again bite and birth is looming over me, but I keep thinking that my birth was just not normal. it won't go like that again. first babies are always the hardest.

and if a 10lb 5 baby due through my pelvis, this next one will - though my birth plan states NO FORCEPS. I'd rather a c section if baby gets stuck.

still no one can explain to me why the excruciating agony in my pelvic floor just after my waters were broken. transition was a piece of cake compared to those hours of sheer hell without any pain relief.

you only birth your first baby once. subsequent births should be much easier.

@learnasyougo I'm so sorry you went through that, that makes mine sound like a walk in the park!
Have you been through your notes with anyone at the hospital to discuss what went wrong and how it could be avoided next time?
Thanks so much for sharing x

I haven't been through my notes with anyone. I doubt they'd have any answers. they did not know why I was incontinent and unable to hold in a catheter last time.
spinning babies website suggests I might have had an uneven pelvic floor that was doing baby descending, the pain being the muscle going into spasm and the unevenness tilting baby's head, making for poor positioning.

it was 18m abs I think I can say I'm over it now, having talked about it endlessly with a very patient DH.

I'm optimistic about my next birth. It can't be as bad, surely! but off I get that full-tale cramping in my pelvic floor when I pee (I was writhing in pain each wee, even in pre-labour, and then a contraction of lesser intensity would often follow) then I'll know to ask for pain relief.

I did research on failed epidural and it really was not your fault. nor Is it something to do with your body that would make it happen again. the drug fentanyl goes into the spinal area where it trickles down along the nerve. it made my bum numb, skipped my thighs and was most effective on toes, calves and knees, because the part that serves the genital area is actually lower in the spine that the part that serves the thighs, even though thighs are lower on your body. sometimes the drug trickles down unevenly and pain relief only works one side (I had half a buttock numb but not the other). this happens in about 1:100 epidurals (you and I, we are the 1% ).

next time is likely too be different, if you do decide to have another epidural. so don't worry. also, second babies seem to be much, much easier to have.

you got through that first labour of yours and you won't have to go through it again for your second. it's more than a clean slate second time round, your cervix and pelvis etc are more experienced.

I hope you get a chance to make sense off all that happened. it's an incredible thing you went through, and here you are, the other side of it, having come through. it's nothing short of heroic, really. shame it's so underrated/understated, but I think that's women for you.

of and like you I was 1cm over, had gained very little weight (15lbs total) so no one new I was too be nothing an elephant seal (but with shoulders). obstetrician doesn't seem concerned

So sorry you had a tough time. Your experience sounds terrible and you must have been exhausted from the 4 days on the antenatal ward before your labour even started. You have done really well to get through this and analysing it can help.

Just wanted to say that if you do have another it will be much easier second time round both physiologically AND because you know your body and what to expect and are ready to be more assertive. I just had my second DC, also 10 lb 6 and it was fine - 3 hours from start of contractions and 5 hours from them breaking waters, despite him being back to back, ventouse delivery. one bit of your post that resonated was about the drip. They came in to me with similar brisk attitude about now it is time for the drip and I refused and asked for more time as I knew that once contractions start my body dilates really quickly. I think though it really helped me that it was my second as it makes pushing much easier. I suspect if it had been my first it would have been CS.

Like a poster above said the uncaring attitude makes things 100 times worse. Am shocked at your MW leaving you like that, and also bit baffled at how she could have known in advance that you ought to have 4 hours wait until you could push.

Congratulations on your baby!

So sorry to hear you've had such a tough time.

Ds1 was 10lb 9oz back to back, my birth was beyond horrific ending in a c section with him too low down and an artery being 'snagged' pulling him out...lost 2 litres of blood.

I was also quite frankly neglected whilst in labour and sent away from 2 hospitals as one was full and the other a midwife led unit and concerned about baby's size.

I know it's hard and I rarely talk about it just typing this is making my breathing fast (4 years later) but wanted you to know you are not alone.

I went on to have ds2 2 years later, it was hard mentally but I knew I wanted another and just went for it! I also knew he would be another big baby which he was (9lb 9oz 10 days early) they said if I'd been allowed to go 2 weeks over he could have been 12lbs.

When it came to having ds2 I was concerned about him being big and it ending in an EMCS and more damage. I must say the midwives and consultant were absolutely brilliant, I told the midwife I wanted an elcs and she agreed without question along with the consultant, in fact no one even mentioned vbacs really apart from to say if I wanted one they would support me.

Wow. There's some really scary stories here.

For balance, I'd like to add that my second DC was 9lb13, so not quite as big as some of your babies, but big all the same. I had ARM and she popped out 5 hours later after some gas and air, with a borderline 1st/2nd degree tear. That's not a stealth boast - just a reminder that big babies can be born without trauma. My previous baby was just over 9lb and was born after an epidural and the threat of forceps!

OP - I think it's really important that you go speak to someone at the hospital. However, this isn't really about the size of your baby. The variance in the size of babies' heads is tiny and that's the difficult bit to get moving, and you're no more likely to have a difficult birth with a big baby than a small one. Your complaint should be about the care you received, the lack of informed consent taken and continuity of care.

I really think the big baby thing is a red herring and you may allow them to fob you off if they try to tell you it was just that she got stuck.

There may be women expecting to deliver soon reading this tread and it reads like a horror story!

Sorry to hear of your trauma at the birth and definitely you should talk it through. It would be great if you could meet with the midwife you really liked and see what her take is on it. Here's a long post because I am a big baby birther too.

I just had third baby and he weighed in at 10lb 10oz (4.9kg) at birth. However I had him at home in under 3 hours, really natural labour, just 'hoofed' the gas and air - love your expression on that, so true!

In advance I too was sent for a late scan to check for low lying placenta (it was high), and at 34 weeks was told baby already weighed approx 6lb10oz - which seemed totally adequate already and I was petrified! Bump 'measured' correct for dates. I was too late for gestational diabetes checks so they scanned me every fortnight until 38 weeks and concluded it was just a big baby.

Previous babies were 8lb10oz daughter (at hospital, water birth/gas and air), then 7lb11oz daughter (at home, water birth no gas and air). Consultant offered me induction at 40 weeks but I spoke to lots of different midwives and they all advised avoiding induction if poss. As I had a history they were able to guess that I would go into labour naturally (first one was 12 days late, second one on time) and I had birthed an 8lb10oz girl first time so had a fair chance of birthing something bigger, they thought about 9lb - 9lb8oz. Therefore also they signed me off for home birth but advised on the risk of shoulder distocia.

They tried sweeps from 40 weeks, like you, but they didn't work until the one I had at 10 days overdue since he was born 11 days overdue.

Home birth as planned, it progressed as fast and furious as the other two births so I was not concerned and had forgotten about him being potentially big. I would say it hurts just the same up to the 10 cm point, the only difference I felt was birthing the shoulders/body. At the last bit with the 10lber (boy) the midwives did move me to really open my pelvis (I was kneeling).

No damage - seemed an absolute miracle. I am 5'7" size 8/10 in case you are wondering what I am like physically. I had focussed massively on self-preservation with delivering the head ie. not over-pushing, panting, going with the contraction etc. I was quite 'with it' probably because I'd done it before and wasn't so fearful as I was during the first birth. In retrospect, even though my first birth was text book, it was incredibly frightening and I have not felt this fear at the latter two.

Best of luck. Don't let it put you off and don't think 'what if'. So many people have awful first birth experiences and go on to feel a lot more empowered at the next one. Hope it has helped to write about it.

My Daughter Was 10 Pounds And 6 Ounces At 39 Weeks Being Induced. I Was In Labor For A Little Over 47 Hours With No Meds And 24 Of Those Hours My Water Had Been Broke Which They Are Not Supposed To Let You Go That Long With Broken Water So I Got An Infection And A Fever, The Baby's Heart Rate Kept Going Up So They Had To Take Her. Main Problem Throughout Labor Was That She Wasnt Turning Face Down Since She Couldnt And They Coudlnt Reach My Cervix To Check My Dialation Which I Was Only A 7 When They Took Her Via Emergency C-Section.

Agree that you definitely had a trauma! My VB was also an induction with the full host of intervention including breaking waters, syncto drip, epidural, episiotomy, forceps, 3rd degree tear, blood transfusion. I've been able to ignore it for the past 2.5 year but impending birth of DC2 has brought everything out fresh. Pretty much terrified of VB but similarly terrified of CS. I was able to speak with specialist midwife who took me through all the notes and she explained the exact reasoning behind every decision. It was reassuring. It'll never be something I can forget but now I can understand the reason behind the fact and rationalise how things were done. She also took me through what can be done differently at second birth.

I think you'd benefit a great deal by hearing this information. On the topic of the quality of care received... I think you should really make them aware of the attitude/behaviour of the MW who didn't measure you or think you looked in enough pain yet. Disgusting!

My DS was 11lb 7oz - we didn't know we was expecting a big baby. He was also undiagnosed breech.

I went 15 days over. They spent nearly 4 days trying to get me into labour by induction but nothing happened. I eventually asked for a section, had to fight, (had a thread on here whilst being induced and MNetters told me to fight for one and finally had him.

Funnily enough I posted a thread on here last night asking What if? My DS is 7.5mo now and it's always on my mind too.

OP - your story has brought back memories for me of my first birth, and the baby was only a normal size. The pain of induction is excruciating and like nothing else, and I too laboured for ages only to need intervention in the end, destroying my muscles pushing hell for leather while numbed by epidural. I also remember the drowsiness of the spinal, the quick change of gear when you are wheeled into theatre... You are a strong woman, and a real survivor. Your child is extremely lucky to have a mother who will fight and work like that for him. It'll be uphill from here! I am sure you will enjoy the baby years all the more for them being a little hard won at the start. xx

Defintely have a de-brief over your birth. I did and it helped a lot although I still get bad memories that fill my eyes with tears and tbh, I think my DH needed some counselling after. Nobody ever thinks about the partner. he felt so helpless and was distressed to see me in pain and ultimately, knocking on death's door.

My first pregnancy in 2011 was relatively easy. No sickness, just nausea and 'off' meat. At 20 weeks I had a low lying placenta and was given a scan at 36 weeks. Call it intuition but at the scan I asked if the baby was okay. i was 'snapped' at and told that that wasn't what i was here for. I was called into the consultants room and told although the placenta had shifted enough, I had low fluid (8cm) and my baby was on the small side.
I was offered a scan at 37 weeks, 38 weeks and 39 weeks. Each time the fluid levels continued to halve and after my 39 week scan I was given a sweep to be induced the following day.
I was given a pessary at 11am the following day and by 1:30pm, I was having cramps. I realised I was contracting and they were coming every 3 minutes and were intense. So intense, I was leaning over stuff, breathing and swaying. I asked for paracetamol as I wanted to keep the heavy stuff til later. By 3pm I knew the paracetamol wasn't touching my pain and asked for gas and air. I was refused as I was on the antenatal ward. I was examined and put on the CTG machine which did NOT show contractions. the midwife saw I was in intense pain but was confused. I showed her where the pain was (where my placenta was). Nothing was done except offered a bath. The bath made me sick and on exiting, i noticed a trickle of blood down my leg. I thought this was normal and said nothing.
By 7pm, I was allowed onto labour ward (only 3cm dilated). Whilst there, they immediately put me on various drips and antibiotics for GBS. Blood splurted everywhere when they put the canula in my hand and I was given pethidine. This is where everything went blurry and I asked for a de-brief four days later because I wasn't sure what was true and what wasn't. Timings up until my c section are all off due to being dosed up on pethidine but I remember them telling me they were going to break my waters. I said they had gone or I was bleeding. She pulled the covers back and I was bleeding - profusly. My baby had a clip on his head and during this time his HB kept dipping. Then all hell broke loose. Alarms went off. My baby's HB had dropped to

My second baby was 10lb 7.
I had lots of scans because they thought he was breach, but turned out he was just incredibly long (60cm) and in a veritable swimming pool so his heart beat didn't come from where they expected.
I was in hospital on due date with high BP but recovered over night and they sent me back home.
Induced at a week late as they didn't want him to grow any more. I didn't find induction too bad. It took a couple of pessaries to get going and there was lots of waiting, but it was no worse than first labour.
The doctors were convinced I'd need assistance getting such a large baby out, but the midwives were excellent and kept them out the way. I had a cannula put in my hand in case I needed intervention, but this wasn't needed and in fact was the most painful bit (they struggled to find a vein)
I had an episiotomy but otherwise he came out just fine.
It did help that it wasn't my first, and that I had excellent midwives.
Being able to breastfeed also put to rest some of my feelings of failure with ds1 where he was crap at it and I had to give up after a couple of weeks.

Hi, did anyone had a 10lb or bigger baby? Which was your experiences, which method you've used and how bad or good was it, any complications? I was due to give birth yesterday, today I had a scan, my baby weights 10lb, they offered induction before but I refused, they offered csection I refusef, tommorrow I am having membrane sweep at home with a hope that it will trigger labour, had some period kindlike pains but nothing major.please help thanks