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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

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Original poster

Tear or Episiotomy- MWs or ladies with experience??

38 replies

Leilababyno1 · 12/04/2011 20:33

I have just finished writing my birth, for what it's worth?!!

The only bit I was unsure about was the episiotomy question...

I wrote down that I would only like an episiotomy if the MW thinks I am going to sustain a tear that will be higher than a 2nd degree level (Or if needed for an assisted delivery).

BUT what is preferable? I have a friend who was never offered an episiotomy, as she wanted a very 'natural' birth (which the MW did her best to adhere to) and then sustained a 3rd degree tear and wished afterwards she had had the cut instead!?

Please advise!!

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Original poster

Leilababyno1 · 14/04/2011 13:12

Bloody hell- didn't realise I would get so many horror stories!

Thank's ladies, due to give birth in 2 weeks and I'm a 1st timer!!..

Oh well, I will just imagine my baby sliding out without so much as a graze on my perineum!

OP posts:

OeufaBrain · 14/04/2011 15:37

I am sooo sorry, I didn't realise it was your first. Ignore me and my horror story. My 2nd birth was a big baby, very easy, tiny tear, healed up no problem.

best of luck!

buttonmoon78 · 14/04/2011 15:55

I'm loving the irony of this! Mums saying it was terrible, it was THIS big, your bits will be brutalised etc then realising that OP is first timer and saying sorry for being honest.

Sisterhood at it's best - yes it's shit, but we won't scare (knowingly) you unnecessarily. When you've done it once then we can all go on about our brutalised bits unashamedly

Leila I have to say that hearing about someone else's reality is far more scary than your own reality. Just take a look and see how many of these people have had more than one. Take me, for example, I'm having #4 in 13 weeks!

Original poster

Leilababyno1 · 14/04/2011 16:27

I know that I shouldn't post on here if I wanted to remain 'blissfully' ignorant! So part of me is always prepared for brutal, no holds barred labour stories- hey, it's MN after all!.....it's human nature to more readily want to share bad experiences rather than good ones!

'what will be, will be'.... Once it starts I will just get on with it- no turing back now....

OP posts:

Almost6 · 14/04/2011 20:18

I've had an epi for assisted delivery with 1st babe, healed really quickly, 2nd delivery was fine 3rd grazed. 4th needed assisted again an had epi, stitches were done to tight and bust opened on 2nd day, so midwife suggested keeping an eye and letting it heal by itself and it did better than the 1st time round! 5th babe was 9.6 and didn't even graze with him! Only thing I can say is jugs of warm water while peeing were a god send even if you haven't got stitches it soothes in the 1st couple of days. N which Hazel on your sanitary pads, cooled, soothes, and helps to heal. Refrigerated is even more soothing, and helps to sit comfortably after. Good luck!

Yellowstone · 14/04/2011 21:55

Epi with first, 25 or so stitches with second, nothing for the subsequent six. Really didn't notice a difference between any.

Swedielass · 15/04/2011 14:35

I too can provide a positive episiotomy experience, which was a result of a foreceps delivery, as mine was done very neatly (stitches done by the doctor who performed the foreceps delivery) and healed very well despite a lot of stitches being required. I could sit down fairly comfortably even after a day or so, never had to take any painkillers (not even Paracetamol) and although it took a while I had no issues with the healing process. I was able to go to the toilet as normal (sorry if TMI) and now - three months later - I can barely tell I've ever had the cut. I am aware it's not as successful for everyone, but I wanted to provide you with 'the other side of the coin' so that you don't go into it dreading the possibility of an episiotomy too much.

b00kw0rm · 15/04/2011 16:01

I had an epi with DD as she was a ventouse delivery- healed really easily and was comfortable within a few days.
With DS (DC2), I had a first degree tear which wasn't stitched and has healed a bit less smoothly , so in a way I feel I actually healed better after the epi...

Original poster

Leilababyno1 · 15/04/2011 16:05

oooh thank's ladies- it's good to hear some positive outcomes also!

OP posts:

marylou242 · 15/04/2011 20:24

I had an episiotomy even thought I was dead set against them. After 2 hours of pushing, massive head (top line on the graph), a full bladder (didn't realise at the time, things had gone a bit numb...), and baby getting distressed, it was the only way he was coming out. I just couldn't summon up any more strength and to be honest I'm glad I avoided ventouse etc. I was told that without it, I'd have torn 'upwards and downwards', the midwife informed me that wouldn't have been pleasant! I'm glad to have avoided that too, epis do have their uses.

It was stitched up neatly, have to admit I made a bit of a fuss about this, and all was fine after a few weeks. I can't even see where it was now.

My advice is make sure the mw keeps a close eye on your bits at the crucial point, and also make sure you don't need a wee when trying to push a baby out!

MrsMoppet · 15/04/2011 20:40

I agree with buttonmoon ... I had an episiotomy (2nd degree) & ventouse delivery with DC1, and it wasn't pleasant - stung like hell for a day or two - but I could pee & poo afterwards with no problems and I had a BRAND NEW SPARKLY LOVELY BABY to care for so I really didn't mind the pain from the epi too much. Even though they stitched me up too tight and I had to have gynae physio for months afterwards, it still wasn't nearly as painful as labour! (and that doesn't last for ever either, not trying to scare you).

I was told that if I didn't have the episiotomy, I would tear right through to my back passage, and so I was very grateful to have it, tbh. Even though it wasn't something I'd ever thought I'd welcome. Also, it didn't affect my next birth: 2nd DC slid out nice and easily, no cutting, no tearing, no pain relief.

Sore boobs when the milk comes in on or around day 5 after birth ... now that's another story. Make sure you have plenty of chilled savoy cabbage (yes, really), ibuprofen and ice packs ready, and hot flannels too.

Birth stories can really freak you out but remember that you will be totally in love with your newborn and in 99.9% of cases this will drastically lower any post-birth pain/discomfort that you feel.

Islandgirllk · 15/04/2011 21:28

With my DD (2nd DC but first labour and natural birth) I had a 'small' tear that the mw said she could stitch or not - I opted for not. When I read my notes it said 2nd degree tear. It healed fine. I must be lucky. We're all different aren't we - mums and babies! I will add I had a horrible time recovering from my planned CS with my DS, it's all swings and roundabouts hey?!

Cyclebump · 19/04/2011 16:21

I very nearly had to have an episiotomy as I'd been pushing for two hours after 13 hours of labour. Luckily DS arrived just as they were about to do the cut. I tore but it was 2nd degree and didn't take long to stitch.

It's two weeks today since I gave birth and I can pee without the graze stinging. The stitches barely register at all and, frankly, the tear didn't hurt that much at the time because it was such a relief to get him out!

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