NHS or Private assessment for Autism

[Goggleb0x]

I have a 12 year old son who I have always felt may be autistic but I have never been taken seriously by our GP or his school.
When he started high school in September he had a really tough time. Some bullying and stress resulted in a bit of a crisis which then resulted in the school insisting I take him to see the CAMHS crisis team. They said (amongst other things) that they felt he was likely autistic and sent out the screening questionnaires which myself and the school filled in and returned at the end of October.
Since then I have been waiting to hear from CAMHS to see if they feel he qualifies to be assessed. I have chased them up several times but apparently they are still waiting for a meeting where this is discussed. So 6 months so far just to see if he qualifies. We were advised it would be a couple of years once they decided if he qualified.
Thankfully with some successful changes at school my son has settled in much better and is no longer wanting to die or having intrusive thoughts.
I’m concerned that this process is going to take so long that he will be in year 10 or 11 before they even get to assessing him, so I am thinking it may be beneficial to have a private assessment.
My GP and CAMHS have told me that they do not recognise private diagnosis for autism.
Can anyone tell me what the benefits of an NHS assessment is over a private one? He’s never been on any medication or anything so I can’t see that would be an issue. He doesn’t have an EHCP or anything. Does an NHS assessment open up help at school that a private diagnosis wouldn’t? If he develops anxiety (for example) and needs medication surely he’d be treated on the NHS for that.
Finally, can anyone tell me, can I try for a private diagnosis whilst waiting for an NHS one? And where would I go for a reputable one. Before high school I had decided that a diagnosis wasn’t important but I’ve definitely changed my mind and feel it’s worth exploring to help my son understand himself in the future.
If you’ve got this far, thanks so much for reading. I’d really appreciate your advice. Thanks.

@LauderSyme
You DO NOT need a diagnosis to apply for or receive an EHCP. It's about identification of needs.

If you LA insist on diagnosis it is their local policy and NOT the law. Challenge it robustly. See IPSEA and SOS!SEN

The NHS waiting list for our DD was about 3 years 8 months from contacting the GP. They said that they didn't offer ongoing support but did signpost her to other places that do. They also had a three session course for newly diagnosed people to help them understand the diagnosis and had useful information about the way they process the world etc. She found it empowering and useful as it put many past experiences in to contact. She was 20 and at university at the time of diagnosis.

Through primary and secondary school she did have some support from them but it was primarily based on being dyslexic only. As the autism assessment team said, very often if the girls are doing well academically and not disruptive in class, they are never considered for autism.

As a family we had already made many adjustments for her at home and got some in to school.

I would advise you to keep communicating with your child and ask him the reasons behind why he's doing certain things that others seem unacceptable. Like the skipping school due to noise making him struggle with anger.

Understanding can help you with advocating for him and making changes. Try to avoid making him feel wrong or defective for experiencing the world the way he does, the get more than enough of it from the education system and peers .

My daughter struggles with noise sensitivity and we were advised to get some earbuds called Loop Engage or Engage Plus. They cut down the volume that she hears, without cutting out too much speech. They are available from Amazon or their website and they are so useful for her. It's allowed her to be in environments where she'd immediately have to leave. She feels this overstimulated loud environment as being a physical pain and also makes her feel enraged before she will shut down.

We were also advised not to use noise cancelling headphones too frequently, as it can make the sensitivity worse.

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