Anxiety in 8 year old DD

[EustaciaVye]

My daughter has always been sensitive, although she is sociable and popular.
She is increasingly experiencing highs and lows, is moody and often doesnt know why. I put it down to emerging hormones, however it has been compounded by the fact she has been having wee accidents (likely a direct effect of anxiety over friendships).

I need to help her learn to cope with feelings of anxiety. She seems lost at the moment and I want to help as it is heartbreaking watching her so sad.

GP has referred her to bedwetting clinic to identify if accidents have physical or emotional cause. Accidents only happen during day.

Suggestions welcome.

I spoke too soon. dd had a total meltdown at bedtime over something teeny. she is on a knife edge this morning and we have already had a couple of tears.

It is difficult to know if it is anxiety or hormones. Sometimes she behaves like me when I am premenstrual.

I like the thumb trick cocolepew. Simple but can see it would be effective as a distraction/empowerment technique, as well as the science stuff.

I also used a mixture of Bach flower remedies, there is a place that will make up ones for you or you can do it yourself. I'm not sure if it was a placebo effect or they really worked but they helped DD at her worst. Saying that I use Rescue Remedy and think it works, you could try that . Jan de Vries do a one already made up especially for children.

I hope she feels better today , it's such a stressful thing to deal with.

Just took dd to get new shoes and I am amazed she has grown a size and a half since September. I wonder if growth has affected her in terms of tiredness and hormones? She has been partic bad in the last few months.

My DD got noticable worse around the age of 10/11, I did blame her hormones, even her hair started to fall out. It didn't help that she has a blood phobia and was terrified of her periods starting.

cocolepew - thing is, there will always be something wont there!

dd said tonight "mummy, since you bought the worry book i havent been worrying as much"

she has only been bringing 1 or 2 things to worry time....

That's true! But the good news is as they get older they are able to remove themselves from anything that is upseting them. I'm constantly telling DD that she can control the situation and not to let the anxiety to control it. It's finally starting to get through .

Today we have had meltdowns about spelling test....every week, and shoelaces on her new shoes...only pair that fit her odd feet and she cant do them up very well so they keep coming undone. sigh. It is exhausting just witnessing the level of tension she can generate...

Appreciate this is a very old thread and those of you commenting have probably moved onto different things. But, if anyone is about, how have your DC who were struggling so much 12 years ago, turned out?

I can really relate to what you're going through. My daughter went through something similar with anxiety, and it was heartbreaking to see her struggle, especially with day accidents like yours. We found that getting her the right support was key. I reached out to autism support workers, after she was diagnosed with autism, they helped her develop coping mechanisms for stress and anxiety, especially around social situations. It made a huge difference in how she managed her emotions. I hope the bedwetting clinic helps too, and you get some clarity on what might be triggering her anxiety. Stay strong, you're doing a great job supporting her!