SIL has put 6 month old DS in FF seat

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My SIL has just moved her nearly 6 month old into a FF car seat. DH and I feel very strongly that rear facing is much safer, especially at such a young age. However, I also believe that other people's parenting choices are none of my business! So I'm just wondering if you think we should say anything to them/forward some of the research on RF being safer. They know we have gone for a RF seat after moving our 9 month old out of the maxi-cosi but we haven't really had a discussion about it. Should we just mind our own business or do you think we should say something? We have lost a family member in a car accident which I think is why I'm so concerned about this issue.

Mind your own business.

Yep keep your nose out. If she wanted your opinion, she'd have asked you about why you have rear facing.

That is what I thought! I will keep my opinions to myself.

hmmmm, I wouldn't mind my own business to be honest! Yes people's parenting choices are their own, but you must not put a child forward facing until they are a minimum of 9kg/20lbs AND can sit up, unaided for a minimum of 30 minutes. So if the baby does not meet both of these requirements they are breaking the law as well as putting their child at risk. (not that the police care of course)

Also, how on earth would you feel if they had an accident and you hadn't at least tried to tell them? I'm a child seat fitter/advisor and I make absolutely sure every single person I serve is aware of ERF and the benefits before they choose a front facing seat, and I don't even know the children!

I think you should say something, but I think you should be very careful how you say it, obviously not wanting to offend or make them feel stupid.

UK law is actually changing next year to R44.05 which will require babies to legally remain rearfacing to 15months minimum. I think you should tell them that you are slightly concerned and print off advice from the british medical journal, rearfacing.co.uk and this from britax Your also welcome to use info off my website www.childseatsafetyplace.co.uk

Stress to them that your really not wanting to poke your nose in, and your not trying to convert them to ERF and it's absolutely their choice, but your just a little worried their breaking the law (as well as his neck if they crash) and that he'd be safer spending a while yet in his group 0+.

What front facing seat have they got out of interest?

If this was my nephew put forward facing at 6 months i couldnt mind my own business. She may not be aware that its actually illegal to forward face before 9 months and also whats the risks are.

ugh, friend did this (her baby was huge, no longer fit in the first size seat, I could understand why she didn't want to have to hunt hard to find an extra large seat) & I bit tongue about it but I didn't know at the time about internal decapitation. I think I would gently say something about 9 months being better due to head strength, and if we were on good terms I would say something specific about internal capitation.

Thinking from other side: I am not a fan of extended RF, by the way; if you came across evangelical about that I'd probably shut out everything else you had to say.

Gosh, I had no idea what the problem was until I read ragged's post. We just didn't know this in our day - I even put my pfb in a carry cot with special adjustment straps on the back seat! How times have changed.

What this does show is that you have to keep up to date with latest research and advice - perhaps your sis is just behind the times in her understanding?

I would show her this: .

It is your business, it's your niece or nephew.

Maybe your SIL is simply ignorant of the dangers of FF car seats for very young children.

It's a tricky one because you don't want to offend, but it is a child's health and safety we are discussing, not something that can be taken lightly at all.

It's okay saying "mind your own business" but how guilty would you feel if she had to do an emergency stop and her child ended up injured? Or even worse had an accident and the child died or was left permanently disabled?

Maybe you could just mention the law changing next year due to latest research about rear- facing and asking if they'll have to buy another seat when the law comes in? I'm not terribly diplomatic myself so you may want to get some advice from someone who is better at putting things gently.

Or you could act completely horrified and ask outright if they've never heard of internal decapitation. It's a horrible phrase but does tend to get the message across.

justforinfo have you got a link about the new requirements coming in this year? I can't find any reference to it elsewhere and as I'm pregnant at the moment and will need to go car seat shopping in the next few months it might be relevant. I moved dd into a ff seat at 12 months because she was too tall for her Graco carrier, she was (and still is!) tall and slim so iirc she was about 10kg at the time. By 15 months she was no where near 15kg (at nearly 4 she's only 16kg now) but her head was at the top of the seat.

Thanks

No problem, the only link I have is this which mentions it, now I hate which? but at least it's something tangiable! (wrong spelling!) I found out a while ago through work contacts within the baby seat industry, I know seats are definately going to have to get bigger though! The Britax BabySafe is pretty tall and already meets these new requirements :)

Thanks. The seat mentioned in that article isn't on sale yet and on mainland Europe it's €400! Yikes!

I can't believe that there hasn't been more publicity about this change in the law which will come in in 11 months time and will affect anyone pregnant or with a young baby at the moment!

Indeed! That's the problem with the UK, you have to dig SO hard for accurate and up-to-date child seat info. It really does need to be made a bigger thing of. I actually had a customer return to me today as i'd sold him a new seat and base for his newborn son, and he was that amazed at all there is to child seats that he went away, researched what I had told him and came back and replaced his other 2 children's seats! He just couldn't believe how rubbish the standards and info available are and I agree completely!

Ask her if she's hoping to win a Darwin award on behalf of her baby?

Well no don't do that, but FFS, I knew 13 years ago that there was a danger of internal decapitation if you put a child < 1 year old in a FF car seat.
Its not a matter of size or 'advancedness' of the baby - its a matter of their spines just not being strong enough to withstand the forces of an impact.

This isn't a matter of 'opinion'. Its a matter of a child's safety.

Companies should be ashamed of themselves for not giving out enough info about this, I tell EVERY single person I serve on child seats about ERF. No matter if they are buying a high-back booster or group 0+. They need to know what they are buying and compromising when they purchase a front facing group 1.

I've just read some reviews about the Cybex Pallas (trying to find out how tight the cushion should be for someone) and one of the reviews said the child looked swamped in the seat but they bought it as it was safer... and that their 'tiny 7.5 month old girl LOVED it!' I mean, seriously???!!!!

Definitely say something!! Or suggest she watches that link or researches it herself. Stupid beyond belief to put a 6month old baby forward facing. We are currently reseaching (and saving ) for next stage RF car seat for our 112month old dd. As soon as I looked into this and saw how much safer it is for them there was no choice in my mind. She was having the safest car seat we could give her. It is difficult though when very few shops sell them. Our local Halfords can order it in for us to try if we pay for it first!! Any recommendations would be gratefully received for good RF next stage car seats...

12 month old dd, not 112!! I should read back before posting really.

so pleased I saw this as was just about to make a massive mistake and buy FF for my 4 month old son and was starting some research. He's a big boy (9kg) and has outgrown his Maxi Cosi Cabriofix already (not wide enough/feet hanging over the edge). Can any one recommend any for me to take a look at - any help much appreciated.

Something with a recline feature such as a Britax Multi-Tech, Britax Max Way, Maxi Cosi Mobi would be a good idea as your DS will still need to be pretty reclined at 4m regardless of weight. Feet hanging off the edge is not a safety issue - head poking over the top is though (most infant car seats stipulate 1" of shell above baby's head for the seat to be safe but do check your manual in case Maxi Cosi has a different criteria).

Do you have him in a cosy toes/coat in the car seat? Have you taken out all the newborn padding and head hugger stuff?

Just having him in a light jacket with blankets over the top is the best option as thick coats are a compression risk (in an accident the coat compresses against the seat harness and the child can be ejected - the straps just can't be tight enough with a coat on to keep the child in the car seat).

Thank you so much - really appreciate it; it felt like a needle in a hay stack and the advice on line doesnt seem to exist, fingers crossed one of the above fits into a Fiesta! Yep have removed head hugger etc and absolutely no chance of getting a coat on him in there - he is a little beef cake - as the weathers nice at the moment it will buy me a few extra days, I would rather he was a bit snug than unsafe. x

Ooooh a car seat fitter. Hijack time.

What is the best ERF seat that fits into multiple cars? When in the UK it needs to go into a clio, a corsa, a big Renault that isn't an espace and a rover 25.

Tall slim child (10kg at 9months) but still fits his pebble quite nicely.

I use a rear-facing seat (recaro polaric) and am generally evangelical about them, but I do have to correct a comment by another poster saying that it's illegal to put kids in a ff seat before 9m: that's bollocks - the seat just needs to be appropriate for the child.

The Klippan Kiss is also very compact and has a great recline feature. The infant part is removable, rather like an infant carrier. It is suitable from birth until they need to move into a forward facing high-backed booster. It can be fitted with isofix or a safety belt. It does have a foot prop, so if you have under-floor storage boxes (like in a people carrier) then that might be an issue.

Fraktal the most versatile rear-facing group 1 I've come across is the two way elite. The In Car Safety Centre in Milton Keynes recommended it to us for grandparents, where it needs to be fitted frequently and moved between cars.

Avoc a forward facing seat is never appropriate for a 4 month old child. The risk to their neck in a front-impact collision is very serious.

New legal regulations are expected in early 2013 that children must be kept rear facing for longer. It is anticipated that the regulations will require children to be kept in rear-facing car seats until they reach 15 months.

See here from November.