Anyone ever SAID anything to you about breastfeeding in public?

[gail734]

I don't go out of my way to do this, but yesterday at lunchtime I BFd DD (9 mo) in TGI Fridays. The alternative was going to be some fussy crying. I promise you couldn't see a thing. The two mummies with me looked a bit surprised. The waiter looked horrified. Nobody said anything, though. A friend told me that another woman called her "disgusting" when she realised that she was feeding a new baby in a sling, while walking around a supermarket!

[lunar1]

Plenty of positives with my two, mostly from older women.

2 negatives, I make sure nothing can be seen but one man sat near to me and said "my turn next", he didn't realise it was my dh stood a few feet away. Needless to say dh scared him off!

The second time was at a sure start centre by the bitch of a receptionist, she asked me to move to the toilets as the waiting area wasn't appropriate. Ds2 was 2 weeks old at the time and I was finding feeding really difficult, I ended up crying for about an hour in the managers office. Thankfully he was really good and got me the breast feeding midwife out. Think she also spoke to the receptionist too. She has never looked me in the eye since!

[SomethingOnce]

The only time I think I had a comment (it's possible it wasn't about m, although, sadly, I'm pretty certain it was) was waiting in the queue for a festival-site-to-public-transport bus.

A young man glanced at me discreetly breastfeeding and said to his friend, 'Ugh, I feel violated'.

[Pandemoniaa]

The generational issue is interesting too. I'm very old (children aged 30 and 31) and we were all encouraged to breastfeed and be out and proud about it.

My mother and MIL's generation (born in the 1920s) were the generation who were encouraged to think that formula feeding was the modern and more desirable way. I was ff but MIL did bf although certainly not on demand (she was genuinely gobsmacked about me ignoring the "rules" that said babies were only fed at 4-hourly intervals) and never, ever, in public. "Public" being a category extended to her own sitting room if anyone else was in the house.

So the elderly ladies that used to comment favourably when I was feeding my babies are now long dead. Them being my grandmother's generation (born at the turn of the 20th century).

[Smellslikecatspee]

Glen, that did actually make me go awwwww

Ps: love the name

[Dawndonna]

Interesting Pandemoniaa I got an awful earful some 28 years ago from a woman in John Lewis about breastfeeding Ds1. Even then JL were good, and kicked her out.

[intheshed]

The only person who ever complained was my MIL

[minouminou]

Awwww....that old guy....what a hero!

We took three-day-old DD to a big Sainsbo near us, and she needed feeding, so I asked the staff in the cafe if they minded me sitting in a corner to feed her despite my not intending to get coffee or anything. They said it was fine, so I got on with it....after a few minutes I looked up to see one of the ladies coming over with a big cup of water and a biscuit for me. I must have been very hormonal and tired because I welled up at her. She did say something nice, but I can't remember what....
Nasty comments....not really. One of my nieces had never seen a yo e bf-ing and was expecting to be freaked out, but wasn't in the end.

[KristinaM]

No, the only unhelpful comments I had in 5 years of bf were from health care professionals. No comments from the general public at all. I obviously look very scary

[beginnings]

MrsKoala, I think, to use an MNism, that no is a complete sentence. The next time someone suggests "Isn't it time you stopped that", just say no!

DD stopped herself at 9mo when I became pregnant. It made me a bit sad!

[miffybun73]

I fed DS for 14 months and DD for 9 months, frequently in the park, cafes, beer gardens etc. I had one or two nice, positive comments, but nothing negative, either verbally or disapproving glances. Maybe it helps that I'm small of chest and the little ones stayed still whilst feeding.

[BegoniaBampot]

i BF everywhere and for quite a long time. Can't really remember anything that negative. surprise maybe but nothing to bother me.

[EggsEggSplat]

Never had anything negative, but years ago a friend and I were in a fairly posh restaurant outside Sydney (only mention location because Australia is a bit prudish about BF in my experience, or at least it was 14 years ago) with our respective DHs and 4-month-old babies.

A man at the next table gave us a bit of an evil eye as the babies started fussing and we both latched them on, but an hour or so later, as we finished our meal and were getting up to leave, he came over and complimented us on our lovely babies and the good job we were doing in keeping them happy and not letting them disturb other customers. Maybe we made a BF-in-public convert that day?

[miffybun73]

Just realised that probably sounded strange, I meant "little ones" as in my children, not my aforementioned small boobs :)

[beginnings]

GizzaCwtch my DH too!! It was bloody ridiculous. He used to get all twitchy and only stopped when I pointed out it was HIS behaviour that was drawing attention!

[ariane5]

My worst experience was when ds2 was 3 days old.... IN NICU

I had been trying to establish bf and had a screen half round where his incubator was but it was v v busy in there and they were putting a new baby into a cot next to ds. The nurse was huffing and puffing as the screen was in the way and the new babys dad was there.
In the end she said to me very angrily " you need to stop now he is right there (pointing to other babys dad) you nedd to put away"
I was shocked but in my tired/hormonal state just did as I was told.

The next day the nurse came and apologised and said she had been feeling unwell and dizzy after long shifts and hadn't meant to stop me breastfeeding.

[littlestressy]

Only positive comments, last summer I was bf DS in the park (about 6 mo), lady walked past gave me a wistful look "that brings it all back" she said with a big grin.

About a month ago took DS (now 16 mo) to supermarket, he was recently out of hospital and getting stressed. I took him to one of the benches by the tills and fed him, older lady next to me on the bench "he's feeling better now love!"

I used to think up good retorts in case anyone ever said anything but they never did

[Goldenbear]

I BF my DD until she was nearly 2 but didn't get any negative comments about it except from MIL who said that she was too old for that now. She was very pro breast feeding babies but not beyond 6 months. My DP was breastfed until he was 6 months, he is 31 and she still curses the nurse who she thinks ruined it for DP's younger brother as she kept taking him away in the hospital despite her protests.

[lakeofshiningwaters]

2 nasty, 1 nice.

Nice - an old gent in Costa who said 'My wife fed my 2 boys, and they grew up into corkers. Yours will too!'.

Nasty - a power-suited couple who loudly proclaimed 'God, there's just no need for that, surely 'they' should use a bottle when they're around people' (clearly neither ds nor I were people!)

2nd nasty - a group of young Mums sitting near me in a park had a loud discussion about how breasfeeding was perverted, and wasn't it nicer to buy your baby pretty pink or blue bottles. Boobs are meant for men not babies.

2nd one just made me sad.

[Pandemoniaa]

My MIL's generation (women in their 50s at the time) did seem rather suffused with resentment about how we refused to hide away in order to do perfectly natural things like bf, Dawndonna. I'm wondering if the woman you encountered in JL was that age too.

[AmandaPayneAteTooMuchChocolate]

Never had a negative. Had quite a few positive.

Had one Spanish mum sit down next to me on a bench in a park in a tourist spot and say something apologetic about "I'm still feeding her", to which DD1 (clearly older than said baby) demanded a feed and we sat in companionable silence doing so. I'd have had a chat, but my Spanish is limited to 'where is the beach' and 'one beer please', and I don't think her English was great.

[MrsKoala]

lakeof - that is very sad. i haven't got very nice boobs and have never attracted a 'boob man' so the boobs are meant for men attitude is totally alien to me. How weird. I have known women who's H's were annoyed they bf'd. But then i find that as odd as those who's H's go off them sexually when they are pregnant - i just can't imagine it.

[Dawndonna]

Yes Pandemoniaa you're right, and of course she was.

[Spo]

I ssw a woman get asked to leave the baby pool last night because she wss breastfeeding

[marriedinwhiteagain]

Yep - my step father with ds who said "you aren't going to do that in front of DH's dad are you?" tut.

Two old bags in M&S cafe with DD who complained to the cafe manager who asked me to be moved to the toilet. I sent back a message to say that if they wanted to have their lunch in the lavatory they were very very welcome to take it there.