Who'd send their sprog to Eton now?

[felulageller]

£46k a year for your DS to watch Neighbours at lunchtime, take all the drugs going, have sex with older adults in fields, leave with a B and D at A level.

Learn zero social skills.

Sounds more like a sink comp to me?

@Ericaequites I don’t about “his truth” but I’ve read somewhere that he did very poorly in the Sandhurst admissions process - the written ones and the interviews - and would not have been given a place if his grandmother hadn’t been the Queen.

I’ve also heard from OEs of that era that William was not a star but a reasonable all rounder at school and generally well liked. Harry on the other hand not only struggled academically but was not popular at all. It was clearly the wrong school for him. It has fantastic resources and great teachers but it’s not a school for cosseting or spoon feeding.

@Undaunted77 I’ll defer to your opinions. I’ve never met an OE, but descriptions, interviews, and biographies all imply Eton is no school for the faint hearted. I’m an Anglomanic American who was educated privately.
If his grandmother were not the Queen, Mr. Sussex never would have given helicopter training. Flight school involves much memorization and written work as well.

Well all these anecdotes are the problem, aren’t they? The Queen fixed it. Not directly but you get what you want, in general, in the RF. Look at Andrew. As young people go to Sandhurst with decent degrees, it’s not surprising Harry was not top of the class. He has been greatly indulged before and after his mother’s death. When it started to become obvious that he wasn’t the brightest, and it would have been at prep school, they still ploughed on to Eton. There are so many great alternatives. Obviously everyone covered up for him. He’s not really taken responsibility. Always complaining about others it seems. I hope William and Kate do a better job.

My ex boss’s kids went to Eton. They were sneering and rude -on the couple of occasions they turned up at my office. Incidentally my ex boss used to be friends with King Charles but that’s a whole other story.

Delorestormborn · 13/01/2023 15:11

He should have gone to the school Charles went to.
Loads of private schools cheat that's how they get good exam results

I disagree. DS went to private school and got* *good results because of subject streaming and small class sizes for the less able. (6 pupils in the lowest Maths set).
I'm not sure Harry would have found Gordonstoun a better fit either as he's neither bright nor interested in academic work. His anger towards life is also rooted in being one of the less able ones at school and then compounded by the comparison to his older brother.

Charles famously HATED Gordonstoun so I don't think he was ever likely to send his kids there. Plus that would just give Harry something else to whine about - Daddy didn't think I was good enough for the same school as my brother so sent me to the one he despised...

Not in a million years, and regardless of any recent revelations.

@Ericaequites I have met a lot of OEs, through work contacts, uni, plus ExP and all his kids are OEs, plus a few of my friends are sending their kids there.

It is a huge school, in some ways very diverse. It used to be that any boy could and would go if he was a legacy and/or had parents who could afford the fees. That was just beginning to change when William and Harry went there, and these days it is extremely tough to get in. You have to be top 5-10% academically, plus they have to be convinced you are motivated enough manage your own time effectively - a bit like being at university. They have boys from all over the world, and lots of boys from less privileged backgrounds on full scholarships, literally all expenses paid.

It is bananas to say that if you go to Eton you will (or are more likely to) waste your time/take drugs/become a criminal/become sneering and rude.

Who you turn out to be is largely a combination of your genes and how your family brings you up. Schools can help a bit at the margin, but they don’t have a magic recipe for turning average kids into geniuses or criminals.

Yes there are Etonians (like Harry) who end up abusing their privilege, doing a lot of drugs and no work, and assuming their parents money and/or status will see them right in the end. However I suspect they would have done that wherever they’d gone to school. Coming from a family with way too much money and uninterested parents can be as unhelpful as coming from a family with way too little money and uninterested parents.

Having said that, would I send my kids to Eton…the answer is no. Partly because I think not everyone is suited to a big school where you have to be so independent from a young age. Also because I think its reputation has been tarnished massively by Boris Johnson, Prince Harry et al , probably unfairly, but nonetheless. I wouldn’t want my kids to apologise for or hide the fact of where they went to school.

@Greatly @Aleaiactaest

I don’t think Marlborough. If they board their parents will want to keep them closer to Windsor/London to keep an eye on them.

I don’t know how bright PG is. He’s not brilliant at sport. Big for his age and enthusiastic but third team, not first team.

I’d say Wellington maybe. All on a campus so better for security. Or Bradfield if he’s really not academic. Or as a wild card, Brighton.

@Undaunted77 As I joke, the only difference between private and state schools is private school students with heavy drug habits are able to afford them without crime. Giving young people too much money can make them careless wastrels. Harry needed a lot more supervision, discipline, and tutoring than Eton could offer. Mr. Sussex is easily led, and had too many deferring or disinterested people around him when young.
As a teenage at a posh private school, I longed to have enough money to buy a Chipwich every day after school. Chipwiches are ice cream sandwiches made with two chocolate chip cookies. Budgeting teaches wise habits, which is important for people on all income levels. You never know how things will turn out.

Marlborough is less than 2 hours from London. Full of London kids.

I'm considering Teddies in Oxford for my daughter so I just hope they don't send any of theirs there!

They won’t use Teddies.

Lambrook is a boarding prep. George might well board from y7. Lots do this for 2 years then transfer to boarding school for y9 fully prepared. They will get more choice of schools if boarding. You don’t have to be sporty for any school. Bradfield would not be in the running either. Marlborough seems a good fit but it will be a name school, not a day school in my view.

I think Harry would have whinged about any school. He had access to just about any help that was needed. I do wonder if Charles buried his head in the sand over Harry? I think he saw some of the issues but couldn’t see what to do. There were others around him who could have helped but I suspect Harry wouldn’t engage with them.

Marlborough is 1 hour down the M4 from Windsor so not far. Colleagues’ kids have a great time there but being co-ed, it is more of a party school than Eton. Also academically definitely not on par. Eton is highly competitive and so many City of London types I know are desperate to get their kids in. The kids have to be smart and have a talent, be it sports, music or drama. The school wants someone who keeps busy extra curricularly and on top of academic work as well as sociable and not emotionally neglected and emotionally robust.

Catherine seems very intelligent to me. George seems to be the typical first born child, sensitive, organised, academic.

I thought they moved to the area for a reason. Lambrook’s is local to Eton. I reckon if George is the right fit and passes the ISEB and interview to a decent level he will go to Eton. I don’t think Kate is someone to send her child to the wrong school. If he is at Eton he can go home every weekend and the other 2 can stay at Lambrook’s. Marlborough is also doable from a commute perspective. She will be looking for right fit and security above all else and that her child makes good friends and has as close to a normal childhood/teenage hood as possible.

They have boys from all over the world, and lots of boys from less privileged backgrounds on full scholarships, literally all expenses paid.

Good post, but you ‘meant full (or partial) means tested bursaries’, @Undaunted77 . (Yes there are scholarships as well, which offer a small reduction in fees - but parents who don’t actually need the financial offer are encouraged to forgo it.)

Suspect H knew it would be inconsequential if he got 4 A levels or none. What was he going to be encouraged to do. I wonder why there was seemingly nobody advocating for him to go down a vocational route and then be a huge player in the charity sector, like his Mother had been. He's charismatic and engaging but unfortunately easily led with an overstated sense of being misunderstood and its coming across as entitlement. The way he was treated differently to W has scarred him, I hope he can repair these trauma wounds and start getting publicity for doing really fantastic things as a figurehead. He can bring attention to little known or supported causes but maybe stop the running insightful commentary, just be the figurehead and stop trying to identify with these causes as if his upbringing and upset qualifies him as an expert. That's the bit I find really jarring. He seems to lack the insight to employ top notch advisors.

Overseas pupils are capped at around 10 per cent I thought at Eton? That is partly why some people still obsess about Eton.

Anyway, the OP is wrong - lots of successful people are still desperate to send their sons to Eton. I know a fair few! The types who look down on Westminster for a reason. Which I would not agree with.
Lots of boys who are siblings do not get in on first round either. So the cronyism had somewhat gone.

Part of the attraction is that London day schools are now immensely competitive with lots of pushy helicopter type parents and that puts some people off. The Eton test is meant to still be more IQ inherent intelligence driven, at least according to some of my colleagues. Who are all obsessed with private schools. I totally acknowledge that my own knowledge is anecdotal though - lunch time listening primarily!

@Aleaiactaest you are missing the point though… Eton is not co ed and the others can’t stay at Lambrook for ever. They’ll want a senior school all three can attend. And they may will worry about the optics of Eton. As we know, all the schools they’ve chosen so far have been different from the schools W & K were sent to themselves, so tradition only goes so far.

Marlborough is definitely a party school - not least because some wealthy London parents send their kids there but it is far enough away (whatever anyone says about “less than two hours”) that those parents won’t be dropping in regularly. The Waleses like to go to watch matches etc regularly. The other reason I don’t see Marlborough is that it wouldn’t be possible for any of them to be day children if they don’t take to boarding. In the old days it was like it or lump it but the Waleses aren’t going to force a kid to board if they don’t want to.

I did wonder about Teddies because in many ways it ticks a lot of boxes (co-ed, v big on CSR, super popular with Lambrook parents) but it’s in the middle of a city full of tourists.

Wellington on the other hand is commutable from Ascot, while also being in the middle of nowhere - plus it is properly co-ed, has all the happiness agenda stuff and access programme. On verra but that’s my tip.

I don’t really care where the Wales’ send their DC…. More interesting to me is whether Eton will also go co-ed in the near future. If so many of the well known public schools go co-ed, will we see more co-ed schools in the state sector. I am fed up with having to do single sex where I live if I want any form of selection or high achieving state school at secondary level. I am hoping long term most schools will become co-ed.

@Ziegfeld - how do you know it is best for these siblings to be in the same school? What about personality issues/competition etc etc all the usual sibling things that can apply. Whilst it can be lovely emotionally speaking to be in the same school sometimes that simply is not the case, especially at secondary level. How would you know what these parents think?

@MetaDaughter you are quite right - they are needs based.

@Aleaiactaest Easy to get around the “overseas cap” by moving to the UK before you apply. Which people do. China’s one child policy has meant that families have gone to extraordinary lengths to ensure the “best” for their child.

Good for boys, not so good for girls.

There's no way they won't board. Contrary to what Mumsnet thinks, day kids are often miserable at full boarding schools and want to fully or at least flexi board. They'll board at a good full boarding independent. I doubt they care much about the "optics" !

@Greatly - well yes, that is what the research shows that co-ed is better for boys’ academic achievements. However, selective girls’ schools can be poor for girls’ mental health. I have heard this from far too many people now. Life is not just about academic achievement. In the long run, I think it is better for both to be co-ed but have safe spaces, like single sex tutorial groups and single sex sports, which happens mostly anyway.

@Aleaiactaest

They’ve picked two schools in a row which are coed and sent all their kids to them. They could have sent PG to Wetherby and PC to Garden House, but they clearly saw value in keeping the family together.

It’s not beyond the realm of possibility that the kids might have special requirements but there are lots of good reasons to think they would go to the same school, one which has the capacity to cater for a diverse spectrum of interests and personalities.

1. security - much easier to arrange with one school than two or three
2. time - you can see all kids in one visit if you have a busy schedule
3. sibling support - they are in a very unique position and need to support each other.
4. house system - given their sexes and ages they wouldn’t be in the same houses at the same time (unlike W&H) which gives them a chance to have their own lives within the same school.

I am sorry you feel frustrated that the highest achieving schools seem to be single sex. Perhaps that’s because girls actually do better academically in single sex settings? If they were to become coed they might not be so high performing any more…. Nearly all boys public schools have turned co-ed over the last twenty years so if that was going to have an effect on the state sector it would have done so by now.

But I don’t think Eton will go co-ed any time soon. The OEs are against it, the school is massively over subscribed. Its problem is not being boys-only but being seen as a place which is hyper privileged.