October 2013 - wobbling and sweating through the last trimester

[roxvox]

Baby due dates/sexes/name choices here

Welcome odd! I was induced with DD (but because of going overdue, so somewhat different) and it was a fab experience. I had two pessaries and refused the epidural they wanted me to have. Instead I bounced in the birth ball and paced the corridors to get everything going. Start (first contraction) to finish was 8 hours. I needed an episiotomy (Clapham - you asked about this - they def still do then here as I know about 5 people who've had them!) because I was pushing for 5 hours and the midwife felt I needed the help at the end, and a drip for the lady hour as my contractions tailed off, but I was fine on just gas and air. In all honesty, I might consider refusing induction AND cs at 39 weeks if the sole reason is your age, and go for daily monitoring. Then opt for induction at the usual time (40+12) if it's not kicked off by then. But it's v personal! I'm having twins this time and have opted for a c section (actually, wound have to have one anyway as they're both breech).

Rox - I agree, I would call labour ward just in case.

On an exciting note, went to John Lewis tonight and got the buggy and two car seats!!!! Ouch! Not cheap as we went for the bugaboo donkey....

I wasn't pushing for 5 hours (typo) - I pushed for 3 hours, which felt like ages!!!!

Oh, and for changing bags, go to babymel.co.uk. They're great!

Thanks everyone for all your great advice - roxvox apparently the placenta can deteriorate quickly as an older mum so they like to take the baby out ASAP. 39 wks is full term so hopefully fully cooked by then. Wrt your ankle I would defo get it checked out - I had a painful foot and MW insisted I saw my gp.

pseudo I think I am the oldest mum my consultant has ever met... So he's playing it safe, first suggested an induction then last appt recommend
Cs.

bowful I didn't know I could ask for daily monitoring that seems like a great idea - feels like it gives me the best of both worlds as does natalie's idea to have a csection in place if needed.

charleston I will have my DH and DM so feel confident that I will have the support I need if I go down that road. I suffer from Lichen Sclerosis which makes the skin around the vag/vulva area very fragile which is prob freaking me out more than anything wrt to an induction ending up in forceps.

slippysnow that's would make a great contraceptive advert!

GTBaby great to hear of a fairly straightforward induction story - although not sure about how the kiwi fits in.....

clapham I didn't know that about epidurals so will check that out - think you are incredibly brave to get even a bikini wax at this stage, I'm thinking I will ask DH to get the hedge cutters out when he returns....

So good to have some other pregnant women to talk to - most of my friends DC are teenagers or heading off to uni so they are all a bit out of touch!

irishfairy I just had a quick look at your link - think I might need to read it a couple of times to fully absorb but certainly looks interesting and typically confirms that nothing is really set in stone. There is so much they have yet to discover about our bodies.

legallyblond again good to hear about positive inductions and sounds like you managed to avoid the dreaded syntocin which apparently can make contractions much more painful. Congrats on the bugaboo donkey perfect choice for twins.

I definitely have lots to think about now and still plenty of time before I have to commit to anything.

Aargh, wide awake, it's too hot and there is a cat fight going on outside my window. My own cats have lined up on the windowsill to watch and are growling too which doesn't help.

A lady on my running forum is having a section tomorrow to have her twins, she is 29+6, one of the placentas is failing. Scarily early, but fingers crossed for her.

That is interesting about the placenta in older Mums, oddlife, I had DS at 36, they induced at 40+12, he came out (forceps) at 40+14 (50 h labour!) and they said my placenta was 'gritty and starting to fail'. Mind you, DS was a healthy 9 lb 9 oz. I think I agree with what Nataliand said, ask for an opinion on whether an induction is favourable, and go for a c-section if it isn't. I'll be 39 on Tuesday, so definitely put myself in the 'older Mum' category!

People might remember my job woes/pregnancy discrimination issues I mentioned a few threads back. Well, my promotion is being announced tomorrow! So I am happy. My CEO got another good sexist remark in though (I am going to be deputy section head as well as department head) and he said 'I want the section run by two people, but one has to be in charge. Just as is common in home life, the man will be in charge!'. I nearly fell off my chair. At least this time it was tongue in cheek, whereas he previous behaviour definitely wasn't!

Sanji, really happy for you! Although you'd think the CEO would have learned a lesson by now! I had a few guys at work who were stuck in the dark ages re how they talked about women (even as a joke, it was all a bit too close to how they really thought!)

Rox, I'm glad you're getting it checked out. Seriously, don't feel you're wasting the Gp's time - it's really worth it, even just to put your mind at ease.

Slippy, YES, that is the photo I meant!! I agree with Oddlife that if teenagers had more education into the realities of birth, it would make them more vigilant with the contraception!

Glad you got there in the end sanji (with job and labour!)

Odd life welcome! perhaps your condition is another reason for c section?

Legally I just got quite emotional imagining your two little twins head up cuddled together (I know they are in separate placentas so couldn't actually be). I don't suppose there is much room for them to turn now.
I think the donkey looks lovely as a double- have seen two about recently, I just don't like it in single mode with the shopping basket on the side.

We did a spreadsheet of our budget last night. Mortgage, bills, groceries and food leaves us with £76 a month for everything else on just DHs salary - clothes, holidays, presents, eating/going out, weddings/events, things for the baby, savings, major house purchases... Maternity pay will be about £7k - £9k for the year (if I go back) but we were hoping to save that in case i don't go back or to cover unexpected things like the car breaking down. (Which really wouldn't be that unexpected actually!) luckily we have done the big expensive things over the last year, wedding, honeymoon, new kitchen etc. Now we really need to cut back. Eek!

Oh and I think a kiwi is the same as ventouse.

orange will I be entitled too tax credits or child benefit? I remember when preg with dd sitting down working our money out at 35 weeks nd crying on the phone to my mum I can't afford a baby and I'm gunna have to give her away but actually we are better off with me not working lol.

Your twin buggy and car seat purchases are making me excited legally I would need a bank loan to go and buy all that in one go lol

Although I started labour by myself with dd at 39+4!I had the pessary and syntoci drip as they suspected pre-e when I went in to be examined as my bp was like 190/110 with protein in my wee and so I also had an epidural in the end I was hoping to avoid the epidural this time but my midwife has already warned me if I have high bp like that agen I will have to have one as it can significantly lower your bp

Just talking n about labour is getting me excited. When I think oh 11 weeks left to go it seems ages but in reality the days r flying by rediculously fast!

Congrats on the promotion announcement sanji

Hope u manage to get some reassurance on your leg today roxvox xx

It's possible that the epidural affected my labour (although I did have a mobile epidural so could feel and move quite a bit). However I had to have it due to my BP so wasn't an option really. Having it also made my cs anaesthesia much easier!

hey guys,
Im sorry - i hardly ever get to posting as the thread moves so fast for me I mostly cant keep up/read it all-I just drop in and out every day! Hope you are all going well & coping with the heat. I see some chat about planned csections and so thought id ask as I thought its really hard to be allowed a planned c section? Im at the stage of worrying about labour and half hoping hes breech so I get the option - but youve made me wonder if there is the option even if hes not? ive so much to learn!xx

morning all. glad everything is going well for everyone. welcome oddlife!!
I've been having the most stupid obsession the last few days that I can't see how my little baby is possibly happy right now squashed up in my dark uterus all day long. I know he is of course and he doesn't know any better, but I'm very claustraphobic and thinking about it, its my worst nightmare!! this makes no sense at all I know, but I feel so sorry for him!! ( I blame hormones!!)
off to hospital for anti d and bloods today, last visit took 2 people 5 attempts to get blood from my awful veins so we'll see what today is like!!

empress all of the ladies in here that are having planned cs are for medical reasons Ie a complication of because of previous sections and no matter how worried u are about labour I really wouldn't recommend going for one unnecessarily it is a major operation and many ppl would love the option to give birth naturally but sometimes the choice is taken out of their hands. I don't mean to sound patronising but a c section is definately not the easy option. If u are genuinely in fear of labour your midwife wi be able to refer you for some councilling xxx

Empress - all I can suggest is to have a look through the NICE guidelines and then have a think about whether you really want to have one. I don't know anyone who has had one who hasn't 'had' to IYSWIM.

Congrats on the promotion Sanj, though I can't believe your bosses comment, what a cheek!

Glad the comments have helped you out oddlife.

Empress in theory you have the right to have whatever birth you want, so are entitled to opt for c-section with no medical reason. The reality is this is often easier said then done! Try not to be scared of labour though, there wouldnt be so many of us doing it again if it was that awful - ask Caz, she is on number 6! And I'm sure those ladies who have had c-sections will tell you it's not necessarily the 'easy' option. I'm started to get quite excited about labour this time. Last time was petrified, which I think contributed to the pretty traumatic experience. This time I feel really up for challenge - keep watching OBEM and pushing with them haha.

Oh, and following the DP food scandal, he took DS to cinema yesterday - so more crap! DS was telling me what he had, DP made a sarcy comment about sleeping on the sofa. I played nice and said of course he has treats at the cinema. I then asked what fruit and vegetables he had had in addition to the crap. The answer? 'Er, there was some dried banana in his cereal'. I can kill him right?

Empress Claphammamma and I would both need a planned c section if our low placentas don't move out of the way of our cervixes in time as the way out is blocked for our babies! and legally is having one due to it being twins and other issues. I definitely want to avoid a c section if I can. Sorry you are feeling worried (I think we all are now it is getting close!) can you talk through your fears with midwife or partner? Someone reccomended some books about labour a while back but I can't remember the titles.

Natalie, we would be entitled to some child benefit as earn under £60k but as DH earns just over the lower threshold we would have to pay it all back again so doesn't seem worth the hassle of the forms and then DH having to do a self assessment tax return.

My planned section is due to my previous (emergency) section and the likely reoccurrence of issues.

Morning :-)

Welcome to oddlife and whistling have you been directed to the FB group? Its great for bump pics and bargains!

I missed all of your ideal flyer but have just caught up, so pleased you're ok but it must have been so scary, and how strange to think of the lady in the next bed. If I've got this right, everyone on the group is at least 27 weeks? I'm 31 today and due on sept 30th so I think that's right? If so, its brilliant that we have all got this far with no premmies.

Pannacotta thank you for the update about chickie1 that's a relief to know she is ok and that the plug can build back up, I didn't know that! You are sisters due in the same month? That is so lovely, I'm jealous! My SIL was due a few weeks after me but they lost their baby early on (many IVF rounds) and I don't know any other mothers. Starting antenatal classes on 1st August though, I'm ridiculously nervous because my Spanish is still crap and I'm not sure anyone will want to bother with me! Also much younger than the average Spanish mummy here it seems!

sanji congrats on your promotion! You deserved it! Although your boss seems a right tit, since joining mumsnet I have become very sensitive to sexism! I pick people up on it all the time haha.

Thankyou charlestone for the boots changing bag tip, I signed up last night and found the offer code online so my bag is ordered and delivering to my mum this week! Its not very attractive but I figured DH would be happy using it. In February I did a very naughty things and treated myself to a large mulberry Alexa as it was perfect for both work and I thought it might work as a nappy bag too!! Its huge and roomy but too girly for DH!

Had 30 week appointment on weds, I still have high blood pressure, and also high cholesterol which makes sense with how fat ive gotten. I've Put on another 2 kgs but in the 3rd trimester it has been approx 1lb a week which I think is the "correct" gain. Not too long to go I guess.....!! Next scan is at 34 weeks and I can't wait!!

Our move is still underway, amazingly our landlady gave us the keys 3 weeks early that we don't have to pay for, so we are moving a couple of boxes over each night, it is SO relaxing for a move!! We're going to ikea tomorrow for furniture and I'm very excited, they have loads of baby stuff as well like baby towels and little gyms. Also got the bugaboo and carseat from England, its not at all bad for a second hand one but I am going to try and hunt down new fabric for it today. It came with the fleece which looks a bit dirty (fleece clings to things doesn't it?!)

Orange, just on the child benefit, I seem to remember when it was changed lots of advice to claim - because if you are not working, NI contributions are still made for you while you claim, so no gaps in your pension. Plus if he is just over the threshold it will still be a quite substantial amount of money.

oddlife I' d recommend reading AIMS 'am I allowed' I've mentioned it before, it's quite short and is about your rights and entitlement during your pregnancy and labour. It also helps you to assert yourself to ensure you are doing what is right for you and your baby. Things like asking the doctor for evidence to back up why they are suggesting csection or induction. It's such a personal thing and you have been given good advice from people that already have had children. Inform and empower yourself and then make the decision best suited to you and your family :)

Definitely worth looking at it again bowlful.

Empress, I'm having an ELCS, not for the purely medical reasons the other ladies have. I've known people who have done the same. I am preparing myself for a vaginal birth too, just in case I change my mind or cannot have an ELCS for any reason. Do PM me if you have any questions (although NHS hospital policies differ, my experience might not set a precedent for what yours may be).

I should say that I am not 'in favour' of ELCSs - as the other ladies have said, they carry their own risks and disadvantages. I would definitely advise that the earlier on in pregnancy that you deal with your fears (e.g. raise them with the consultant/midwife, write down and analyse what you are scared of, read lots of books on both - these are all things I did) then the better the result will be for you, whether you end up trying for a vaginal delivery or an ELCS. For example, sometimes the midwives can provide reassurance about certain aspects of a vaginal birth, which means you are far more comfortable about the idea of having a vaginal delivery. I would definitely recommend Ina May's 'Guide to Childbirth' as well.

Morning ladies, just caching up.
Thank you for the news on crookie pannacotta, also vey jealous of you being sisters pregnant at the same time, I am the oldest of my siblings and cousins so no one is planning on having children anytime soon, which does make me sad for my children as we always had so many cousins and family of a similar age which was lovely growing up.

I have no experience of c section but would agree with what everyone has said about speaking to your midwife about your fears empress I would imagine making sure she is aware is the first step and it may be she is able to help reassure you in some way.

Welcome to the thread oddlife

flyer where have you bought all your dresses from? are they maternity? I have a wedding today and am wearing a maxidress from monsoon, bought it at the start of my pregnancy and just bought a medium instead of a small, fits well and still look pregnant not fat which is my main issue with maxi dresses atm. Have you got time to go shopping?
Have also had to give up on wearing heels due to feet swelling at in the heat. eugh.

I can only wear my Birkenstocks or my dog walking sandals now pink! I wore trainers to walk the dogs in the rain yesterday and my feet went numb...