Phew, I thought I'd never get chance to post here - mad isn't it?!
Arlo, (born at 09.30ish on Wed 22nd June at 6lbs 9.5oz) and I finally came home from hospital on thursday evening after 8 days in SCBU. I haven't had time to read through the June thread, but I have been trying to keep Lippy updated by text and I think she's very kindly been posting snippets for me.
Here are the gory details (bit long, sorry):
00.30 on Wednesday morning waters broke, started contracting immediately. Pottered around the house, had a shower etc. I was expecting 12 hours or more of this, but as they seemed to be coming very frequently, I called the ward after about an hour. They told me to wait a bit longer as it seemed a bit early to come in. I waited another hour then, worried that I must have a very low pain threshold, and they'd send me home, called them to say I was definitely coming in anyway.
Got to the hospital at 03.00ish and to everyone's suprise discovered I was 5cm dilated so proceeded with labour. The midwife read my birthplan which went something like this:
No intervention if at all possible
Might want birth pool
Definitely to be moving and upright or on all fours
Music, subdued lighting
Gas and air only, unless I'm in a lot of pain in which case would like a mobile epidural
Don't want umbilical cord clamping for 2 mins
Want to try breastfeeding within first hour
Home as soon as possible
The gas and air thingy wasn't working properly so I didn't use it for ages, and after a while I asked if I could possibly have an epidural please but after about 2 and a half hours when I began getting the pushing contractions, the mw replaced it for me. That helped a miniscule bit. Anyway, the mw was monitoring the heart rate intermittently and discovered after I had been pushing for nearly two hours that it had dropped right down to 50. There was talk of getting the doctor. I continued pushing as hard as I could for about another half hour. Pod just wasn't moving anywhere. The mws called for the doc then changed shift, the new mws took me straight to another room and put me in stirrups and on all kinds of monitors whilst we waited for a doctor. The doctors were also changing shift unfortunately, so in the end I had to wait for about an hour trying "not to push" (!) Eventually she arrived, had a look at me and I was taken straight to theatre. Another wait for the anaesthetist, who, after faffing around asking me questions and organising stuff for what seemed like an eternitiy gave me a spinal block. My goodness, the relief!! But how weird. The strangest experience I have ever had by a long way - I saw legs that were apparently mine being being lifted into position, then saw the doctor's face contort and break into sweat as with all her strength she tugged poor Pod out with the ventouse. Then this wet purple creature was placed on my chest for a millisecond before being whisked away. The cord had been cut immediately. He was suddenly surrounded by lots of doctors and nurses in the corner of the room and I could hear this horrible gurgling noise as they tried to resucitate him. I could hear poor dp puking his guts up outside the door. So much for my planned birth!
Anyway, he was taken straight to the Special Care Baby Unit. I was put in a room by myself, I told dp to stay with Pod, so I spent a very odd 6 hours mainly on my own not really knowing what was going on and not knowing how to feel, certainly not feeling like I'd just had a baby. I must've been very spaced out. Eventually one of the nurses offered to take me to see him in a wheelchair. As we were getting ready to go, another nurse came and told us we would have to wait a bit longer and took the wheelchair away. I was told Pod was being seen by the doctors and to go a bit later. After a total of about 7 hours I was taken to see him (can't remember where dp was at this point) Discovered that just as I was getting ready to go and see him he'd had a "cycling" fit which had thrown everyone into a panic. Poor little mite was hooked up to everything and in an incubator in High Dependency. All a bit of daze from then for a while to be honest, but I remember he had loads of fits in his first 36 hours or so.
Staff were amazing and let me stay with him all the time. But it was hell. The consultants were so non-committal about prognosis when I'd never needed answers more in my life. My mind was being pulled into some very dark places and it was a monumental effort to steer away from them. I was ok when I was with him, I automatically found strength for him, but it was a long and lonely corridor leading from scbu back to my ward, full of loved up mums with their spanking new babes, balloons and visitors. Thank goodness, after those first 36 hours, Pod, now Arlo, stopped fitting and seemed a lot better, we took his feeding tube out and I was able to feed him with a bottle. He slept almost solidly for a couple of days and every day since then he's been making a marked improvement. Arlo has been holding things together better than any of us. He's done so well that he was able to come home on Thursday evening, which is loads sooner than anticipated. I'm giving him his medication which he'll be on for a couple of months and he's now doing all the things that babies do. He's beautiful and we're totally in love with him.