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A potentially strange birth request...

61 replies

aprilshowers2015 · 16/02/2020 18:12

I am 31 weeks with DC1. DH and I chose not to find out the sex at the anomaly scan, well, I chose and DH agreed.
DH would really like to find out the sex when baby is born and tell me, but (we're watching a lot of OBEM) it seems that the midwife usually makes the announcement.
Now the whole way along, we've made it clear that the baby is the priority, ie at the anomaly scan we said we would prefer not to know but for the sonographer to do what they needed to do and if anything popped up then so be it. The same with the labour, the baby being born healthy is all we really care about.
My question is, has anyone requested the midwife not announce the sex at the birth and how was it received? I don't want to come across as someone with unreasonable requests but my DH really wants it to happen this way. Any thoughts on how I can approach this without sounding like a princess or should I just leave it? Thanks!

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Stripeyshirts2450 · 29/02/2020 18:07

Of course! We did it. Also fyi OBEM is drama made for tv. Please don't take it all seriously (it causes midwives lots of grief!)

Boopbedooop · 12/03/2020 18:44

This is exactly what I did with my first! Although my partner was so overwhelmed he forgot to check and had to be reminded! Grin

MichelleOR84 · 07/05/2020 09:00

We waited to find out and in my birth plan we asked to see the reveal ourselves .

During labour we talked about it with our midwife . As soon as baby was born , he was held up to us and my husband announced it was a boy to me . It was such a happy and emotional moment .

I’m pregnant again and am definitely doing it the same way . Although this time , if I can , I would like to announce the sex to my husband !!!

autumnboys · 07/05/2020 09:05

I think it was in all our birth plans. With ds2, he was delivered by emcs and as they were
Bringing him to show us, the surgeon said ‘it’s doing a wee!’ And I turned to DH and said ‘it’s a boy!’ as baby came around the screen and finished his pee on DH. I assumed if they could see it amid all the general birth gunk, it must be a boy, but I admired them sticking to our request.

Loubylou9162 · 07/05/2020 09:07

My midwife asked me while I was in labour how I’d like to find out the sex. She said she could tell us, she could hold baby up so we can both see or Dh could look and tell me.
I had an emergency section so she quickly held her up so I could see she was a girl it was lovely

aprilshowers2015 · 07/05/2020 18:45

Thanks all for you replies, I loved reading them all.
Our little girl arrived last Tuesday morning. After induction, 2 hours of hardcore pushing, forceps and episiotomy I really just wanted baby out safely but the midwife looking after us made sure my husband was the first to see and able to announce it. A perfect end to our birth story 💕

OP posts:
MichelleOR84 · 07/05/2020 20:03

Congratulations 🥰

suriv · 07/05/2020 21:27

How lovely!

I just picked up on this thread, we asked the same thing and after about 5 minutes the midwife said 'do you not want to know what it is?'

In the moment we were so overwhelmed we didn't think about it!

OnNaturesCourse · 08/06/2020 20:16

We did that with our first.

I had no birth plan...i just asked the midwife when we got to the delivery room. I said I didn't mind anyone finding out before me, like midwifes, doctors, etc but I wanted my partner to look and tell me what baby was.

It worked... Right up until the point where the doctor said "would Dad like to tell Mum what baby is.." (which I though was a nice way of doing it) and my partner was in that much of a shock he looked and went ehrm, errr, ehrm... 😂 Eventually I looked down and my partner said the sex just as I did. It was imperfect but perfect to us.

Cheesewine · 08/06/2020 20:26

I had my baby last week. That was my only request . We just said to the midwives that's what we wanted and it was no problem at all. Good luck .

Wheresthebiffer2 · 08/06/2020 20:36

Congratulations AprilShowers.

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