Please or to access all these features

Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

my baby has gone

49 replies

sadkim · 12/04/2008 13:41

i recently lost my two year old daughter to a horrible disease that was destroying her brain. i am finding it very hard to accept the fact that she is gone i am looking for some one to talk to who has been through a similar situation

OP posts:
NotABanana · 12/04/2008 15:58

I have no idea what you are going through and just wanted to send huge sympathies. Life can be so cruel at times.

Lomond · 12/04/2008 16:02

I am so so sorry for your devastating loss. Wishing you strength to get through it as best as you can. I really cannot imagine what you are going through

starscream · 12/04/2008 16:07

im so sorry for your loss, you must be feeling so empty, i havent been through what your going through right now but i have a 2yr old who has a heart defect so serious that she could be taken from me at any time i take every min with her to my heart no words could help u right now ill pray for you and your family x x x x

soph28 · 12/04/2008 20:08

hello,

Akira is a gorgeous name! She sounds wonderful. Is that a photo of her on your profile?

sadkim · 13/04/2008 16:50

yes that is my angel

OP posts:
sadkim · 13/04/2008 16:57

i have added a couple more pictures of akira

OP posts:
windygalestoday · 13/04/2008 16:59

sadkim xxxx i dont know what to say i read a poem once about a bereaved mother saying dont as me how im feeling -ill only lie,it wsnt for the best my son didnt need to die etc etc all i can say to possibly console you is that in the arms of jesus your beautiful daughter is safe and well and looking down at you and she nows the time she had with you was filled with love xxx

NorthernLurker · 13/04/2008 17:01

a beautiful little girl - so sorry for your loss

Jenkeywoo · 13/04/2008 17:03

Sadkim - I'm so sorry to hear about your beautiful girl Akira. Thinking of you. xxx

nkf · 13/04/2008 17:07

I am very very sorry. Take care of yourself.

Mercy · 13/04/2008 17:09

So sorry for your loss, sadkim. Best wishes to you and your family.

(beautiful name and photos)

charleymouse · 13/04/2008 23:02

So sorry Sadkim sending you hugs you are in my prayers

ggglmpp · 13/04/2008 23:07

Ilost my two year old daughter last year. Please contact me if you wish.

gggglimpopo at hotmail dot com

biglips · 13/04/2008 23:08

...so sorry to hear

emma1977 · 13/04/2008 23:16

Its not often that something makes me cry, but your post and the photos of your gorgeous baby have.

I used to be the GP to a little girl who had congenital adrenoleukodystrophy. Watching her deteriorate was heartbreaking for me, I can't imagine how it was for her poor parents. You have my every sympathy.

I'm sure you were a wonderful mummy to Akira and I'm sure you shared a lot of happy times together, but sadly not enough. You will never truly be without her.

If I could put my arms around you I would.

Much love, Emma

honeybrown · 13/04/2008 23:22

Sadkim,
My heart truly goes out to you. Akira was a beautiful little girl. She looked so like you - particularly in the last of the photographs.
Keep posting as I am sure you will find lots of support here. x

dippymother · 14/04/2008 09:32

Have been thinking of you this morning.

It's heartbreaking to lose a child, the worst possible nightmare, and you may find it a comfort to talk about your feelings to family, friends, professional support groups (Compassionate Friends/Cruse etc) or here, where there are lots of bereaved mums (me included) who will be able to support you.

I always try to think that as we all die one day, it is better to think of a life completed rather than a life cut short.

Hope this verse comforts you.

BABY CASTLE

In a baby castle, just beyond my eye
My baby plays with angel toys that
money cannot buy
Who am I to wish her back
Into this world of strife?
No, play on my baby
You have eternal life.

At night when all is silent
And sleep forsakes my eyes
I'll hear her tiny footsteps come
running to my side
Her little hands caress me so tenderly
and sweet
I'll breathe a prayer and close my eyes
and embrace her in my sleep.

Now I have a treasure that I rate above
all other
I have known true glory - I am still
her mother.

Broodybabywannabe · 14/04/2008 12:53

im so so so sorry all my love to you x

ktmoomoo · 14/04/2008 12:56

[huge hug icon]
sorry for your loss

CaptainDippy · 14/04/2008 23:35

Hugs & prayers. Your daughter is so beautiful. xx

Doobydoo · 15/04/2008 09:40

for you. What a beautiful daughter.I hope you receive the support you need.xxxxxxxxx

ggglmpp · 16/04/2008 07:13

Just leaving another message for you - I know how hard it is to read through and take everything in at the moment.

I lost my little girl Maude to sudden unexplained death in childhood, last year. She was two years and two weeks old. If I can help,if you wish to talk to me, please do contact me

gggglimpopo at hotmail dot com

Leenie · 22/04/2008 11:43

Hi SadKim,
I read your thread, and couldn't not reply, one of my closest friends lost her little girl at over a year old, her daughter had a great personality, was walking and had learned to do so much too, my friend took a long time to even begin to get over this, eventually my mate has found solace in spiritualism, she now feels so close to her daughter, she knows that she is near her, it really did give her a new inner strength
( we are not church fanatics, trust me ! ) but the change in my friend was both amazing and beautiful, she is no longer sad, and she has this amazing strength now that makes her a rock, don't get me wrong it has been a really rocky road for her, my love and hope goes out to you sadkim, i know that it will never stop hurting, but as you find a strength within you it will become a different kind of pain, i am sending a big hug to you x

vio · 22/04/2008 13:50

hi sadkim, so sorry for you. I know it's very hard as I too lost my son to a terrible condition. James ( many here know about him) died last year in Sept, it will soon be his 1st birthday. Although I can never see him again, I often have this pic in my head ( called me silly that he's learning how to walk now ) he lives in my heart.

We decided to do the Great scottish walk, in memory of James, I want to remember him in a positive way, you can read about james on www.justgiving.com/jim_jim

What i want to say is, for me, personally, I know the pain will never go away, my love for James is unconditional, he stays in my heart, everyday I remember him, but I wake up everyday thinking James has made us the people we are today, he's one wee angle, he taught Mummy and Daddy a lesson. When i was weak, i think of James, then I will become stronger but then yes, I do cry sometimes, every now and then when I think of his life, his condition and how much he had to put up with as a baby, I will become tearful.

We used Robin House twice and James left us at Robin House, there I became good friend with a mum whose son has a similar condition as your baby girl, he has got a genetic condition called Krabbe disease, hes now 21 months. He was born healthy, it was until hes about 6 months old, he became ill, and he slowly lost all mobility, he lost the ability to suck and spent a lot of time sleeping...with his condition, average life expectancy is 2 year old, his mum is one very brave lady, both her and her hushand are wonderful parents.

I think there is nothing anyone can say to make you feel better, you have to learn to carry the pain, talking to people in similar situation helps. I talk about James very often, I love him and I would tell people that I want to talk about James. Anyway, your baby girl stays in your heart, she has gone but her soul stays....take good care of yourself and be proud of yourself and your baby girl.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page