How long after death of parent did you turn a corner?

[sleeptight1]

My Mum died suddenly a month ago. I know that everyone's situation is different but how long did it take before you felt you had turned a corner and were beginning to cope better with it?

About a year.. l had four sisters to lean on .

My mum died 18 months ago, took me about a year to start to feel anywhere near normal. Started taking an interest in cooking again

My Mum only had one brother, I have two and I have sons and no daughters so my Mum and I were very close, she was my best friend.

About an year to feel more like myself again, a few months to feel like I had my emotions a bit more regulated.

Five years.

I think if the death is sudden it will take a while for the shock to wear off. I felt very sad for probably a year or two. Now it’s 7 years and it’s still very sad but it was the start of other losses and the end of an era and all that so the sadness kind of permeated my childhood home and my remaining parent too.

just try and accept and give in to the grief. Best of good wishes to you

With my Mum, my Dad and I faced it together. He was over 90 when she passed away and it wasn’t entirely surprising that I lost them both within 18 months. I’m beginning to feel more like me again now, I’m past the can-only-do-stuff-because-I-have-to stage but it’s less than a year so I know there are emotional moments to come. I think I’m round the first corner.

Six years ago, my only sibling passed away. My mum was in her 80s and I think it took her a couple of years to come anything like to terms with it.

My initial stumbling block when my dad passed away was all centred on it being ‘just me now’ from the family unit of 4. I kept saying “you’ve got this” “you can do this” but actually I just wanted to drink tea and watch tv. Once the paperwork started getting sorted I felt better but just realising memories can be cathartic was the true turning point.

Hope this helps. Take care of yourself

I think asking people this question is hard as someone who lost their mum when they were 13 (my friend) vs 68 (my mum when my grandma died) will have had quite different experiences.

FWIW I was 30 when my father died and the shock took 1 year to wear off and the sadness a couple of years. I still feel sad now on occasion many years later as I feel cheated that he died before he was even 60.

My mum passed away in Feb, I now have no other relatives.
I sometimes feel.as if I should be heartbroken and devastated but she was 92, she was very tired and she missed my stepdad very much. He died 2 years before her and she wanted to be with him.
If she had lived she would have gone into a care home and she really didn't want this.

I get tearful at times but I also get great comfort knowing it was her time and what she wanted.

I'm so sorry for your loss.. I was in complete shock when my mam died and had around 2 months off work.

The funeral also took 6 weeks as my mam had to have a post Mortem and dying over Christmas.

I did find the funeral helped and on the night of her funeral I had the most vivid dream tear she came to say goodbye.

My mam also died very suddenly and unexpectedly.

I'm 14 months on since my darling Dad died and I'm very slowly starting to feel me again. I still miss him and his voice with a physical pain though - not sure that will ever go.

So sorry for your loss.
It's been four years for me and I am still struggling. It's hard when there was so much love

My dad died three years ago and I am still in a reasonable amount of denial about it. I had grief counselling (my work paid) and that got me through months 3-7ish. I still miss him every day and rue that I'll hopefully (weird choice of word) have more life without him than with him and that makes me terribly sad. He should still be here, watching his grandkids grow up. He was an absolute legend. Bastard Covid
Sorry for your loss x

It took me 18 months. I was badly hurt in an accident during this time too which I think delayed the healing process. I'm the only member left from my family and even though I have my own family who I love dearly there are some days I feel such a yearning for how things used to be and for my family who have passed.

My dad died very suddenly 9 weeks ago. He was 85 and was still going to work,and hours before he died,we were discussing what job we were going to do next ( I also worked with him).
His death was a terrible shock,and I'm not sure if it hasn't hit me yet,as the weekend he died,we started lambing and I've worked every day and night since,so haven't had time to think about it too much.
I haven't really cried much,but I miss him terribly,I keep thinking that I'll see him trundling onto the yard on his mobility scooter,or I see someone/ something and think "I must tell dad about that". And it hits me that I can't.
I'm grateful to have had such a fantastic dad,and for as long as I did. I'm also grateful that he went suddenly,for his sake,he couldn't have stood being bed bound and incapable doing the work he loved. I'm putting all my energy into keeping the farm he loved so much running,as well as running my own business,so if it'll hit me at some point in the future,I don't know.

I am so very sorry for your loss. My mam died very suddenly too. I feel around the 8 month mark I realised I wasn't crying quite as much and at the year mark turned a slight corner. I am still very much grieving but feel more me at the same time if that makes sense.💐

1 year to feel quite a lot better but it’s still an ongoing process 2 years down the line.

So sorry OP. My Mum died fairly suddenly over 15 years ago. After six months we had been through all of the 'firsts;' her birthday, Christmas, my birthday (which was a very upsetting day for me reading a card just from my Dad.) So I'd say for me about six months - after that I stopped crying in my car on the way home from work. It took me several weeks to bring myself to look at photos of my family again without feeling so desperately sad. Now I have so many wonderful memories of her and sadness doesn't really enter my head very much just grateful for her and all she gave to me.

Three years

... though it's 29 years now and I still feel a bit wobbly occasionally

Years with one parent - and tbh I still feel sad about it quite often. Probably less than a year for the other parent, though I do still have the occasional twinge. TBH losing my sibling has been worse.

I'm just over a year down the line from losing my Dad and only now does it feel more bearable. I don't feel as bereft as I did. I can talk about him now without sobbing. The empty space he's left will never be filled but i am starting to be able to cope without him here.

10 years

I’m so sorry for your loss. Losing a parent shakes your foundations.

Hi. Sorry for your loss, it is very hard.

My mum's death was expected and I was less close to her. I felt sad but not particularly grief stricken so I was shocked by how devasted I felt after my dad's sudden death 5 months later.

It took me about a year to get over the shock of his death - to get to the point where I wasn't sad / tearful at least once a day. During that year there were better and worse days but I would get very upset everytime I thought about him, which was often. Now (nearly 7 years later), I still get a bit of a pang when I think/speak about him and I do miss him - but I don't get upset or feel down about it.

It's early days for you yet.