My gorgeous son passed away. He was 28 :(

[StantonDrew]

I don't know how to 'be' any more. Nothing feels normal. I feel as though I'm in a nightmare that I'm continually pleading to be woken up from. How on earth can I survive this? I don't even know how to relate to people any more. How do I keep getting up each day? I guess this is a call for help :(

So, so sorry to hear of your truly awful loss, Stanton. I remember a school friend of mine, who lost her son aged 8, writing that those who have suffered the loss of a child of whatever age are the "aristocrats of pain". You are so right to talk of your feelings, and to talk and talk and talk. You need to celebrate the wonderful young man who is your son and who lives on his own child, and in your words and heart. Please be kind to yourself, and know that so many people are thinking of you.

OP,

Scott sounds a wonderful person, son and father.

To have had him so cruelly and unexpectedly taken from your lives must feel utterly devastating. I imagine the cause being as yet 'unknown' further compounds that.

I wish you, and everyone close to him, all the very best during such a traumatic time.
And that your DGS brings you comfort.

Important:
In bereavement, we so often self-pressurise, in order to protect others. Being brave/ strong/ a coper etc. is admirable.
Admitting you're vulnerable is equally so.

Remember that you (all) have every right to feel (guilt-free) damn angry/ despairing/ secretly jealous of same-age, living young men, and/ or any other 'taboo', uncomfortable emotions.
Entirely normal, understandable and very human.

He sounds like he had a wonderful life, OP.

Time heals or so they say, I think the wound is not so raw, but the scar is always there. So sad Xx

I am so, so sorry for your loss.
I lost my darling son last year at the age of 27.
My heart goes out to you. There is no pain that compares to the loss of a child.

I don't have a clue as to how you even begin to process something so illogical as losing a child. Particullarly exaserbated frustration when theres no explanation like this. My deepest sympathies

Grief and recovery effect all of us so differently. I need to keep really, really busy or feel like I'm losing all grasp on reality. Whilst in parallel dont want/ cant cope with the added pressure of others needs and expectations.

Do you need things to do to keep functioning and a reason for each day?

Scott sounds so wonderful, i'd be so proud to be able to say those things about my own DC when they reach maturity.

I'm so sad for his son, your grandson, that his wonderful dad has been snatched away. Would it help pass time for you to spend some time making little videos/ memoires and an album all about Scott for when his son is older - or possibly everything is so raw and numb.

My heart goes out to you.

How are you StantonDrew?

I hope you have people around you to support you.