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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Can a 3 year old learn to read?

50 replies

Mooncupflowethover · 12/03/2010 20:28

I'm asking because my DS1 loves being read to. He often brings books to me during the day and asks me to read them (although I know a lot of kids do). Just lately he's been pointing out words on packets, tins, toys etc and asking what the words are.

I'm really not into hothousing kids at all. I was perfectly happy for him to wait until he went to school to learn to read, I have no desire for him to be precocious.

Having said that, he does seem really interested. Do you think I should try to teach him, or just wait until he's older?

If anyone thinks teaching him would be a good idea, have you got any good book recommendations to start him with?

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orienteerer · 13/03/2010 21:33

Probably, but there is absolutely no advantage in starting so young in my experience, it all equals out in the end. I wouldn't try to teach at this age. We lived abroad and DS had no formal reading instruction until moving to the UK at age 5.6. He started school in the last 6 weeks of Reception. By Dec in Yr 1 he was all but up there with his peers, now in Yr 2 is is ahead of many of them.

Twinkster · 13/03/2010 21:36

It does equal out in the end, but I think holding back a child who's desperate to read is just as bad as pushing one who's not interested. It's not about everyone being the same in the end or about giving a child an artificial 'advantage'; it's about going with the flow of the individual child. My DS is now in Y3, and of course everyone can read well. However, he's spent the last five years hoovering up information from books, and his general knowledge is astonishing as a result. Not that this is any big deal - but given that he's so desperate for knowledge, it's a big deal to him.

MinnieMalone · 13/03/2010 21:40

I read at 3, DH read at 3, my son read at 3. I don't see the sense in this whole 'hold them back so they aren't too far ahead at school' thing.

I also disagree with the 'it equals out' statement. For some children it does. For others it doesn't. I was always way ahead of my peers in reading and literacy (not boasting...I was appallingly bad at maths), as was DH.

DS is 5 with a reading age of 10. I doubt his peers will catch up with him any time soon.

orienteerer · 13/03/2010 21:42

Twinkster - I guess we came from a Kindergarten environment where none of the children were introduced to reading so there was no precedent (or competition). What I mean is they were encourage to learn through play (so they did, iyswim). Reading simply wasn't on the agenda so they explored other options.

Chellesgirl · 13/03/2010 21:43

dd is 2.1 and can read her name, mommy, daddy and nanny. I have no qualms in teaching children to read young, as long as they take the lead and we dont force them to do it. If your child seems interested in reading, let him read, teach him, if he isnt bothered, dont force him. DD isnt interested in me reading books to her, she just flicks through the pages, its when I write something that she can recognise it, which at 2.1 i think is very good. At nursery age in UK, children learn to read and write. A child is expected by the end of the nursery yesr to be able to write thier name. In private nurseries ( like the one I used to work in) we had to teach the 2 year olds how to write thier name and if the younger ones wanted to join in, we had to let them. Both my sisters went to nursery and now they are very clever acedemically A and A* students. Me - well I never went to nursery and Im a E grade to a B grade student. It may have been genetics or the fact they had a head start in school, or it could be both...either way, it worked for them!

Twinkster · 13/03/2010 21:49

Minnie, you're braver than I am. At 5, my DS had a reading age of 14, and he is still streets ahead of his peers (as it happens). But I didn't say so because it sounds pushy.

I still think, though, that it's going a the individual child's pace that matters. Orienteer - I can see that your experience is very different. What I wonder, though, is what happens when an 18-month-old is standing by a notice in the street, desperately trying to sound out every word (as DS did at that age)? I told him the letter sounds once, and he knew them without ever being told again. DD, at four, still didn't know them all (and didn't much care, either!)

orienteerer · 13/03/2010 21:50

School starting ages elsewhere in the world

4 Northern Ireland

5 England, Malta, The Netherlands, Scotland, Wales

6 Austria, Belgium, Cyprus, Czech Republic, Greece, Hungary, Iceland, Republic of Ireland, Italy, Liechtenstein, Luxembourg, Norway, Portugal, Romania, Slovakia, Slovenia, Spain, Turkey

7 Bulgaria, Estonia, Denmark, Finland, Latvia, Lithuania, Poland, Sweden

Source: the National Foundation for Educational Research

EggyAllenPoe · 13/03/2010 22:44

the official commncement age of compulsorary state education is no guide to how early children learn to read.

in taiwan, eg, most kids attend some form of 'school' from 18months (unless their folks are broke) though formal school begins at 7. and yes, they introduce letters then....(in English, Mandarin is more problematic)

in Sweden, i doubt the kids are at home playing all the way up to 6 without ever seeing a book....

vesela · 15/03/2010 09:40

orienteerer, but 6-7 isn't the ideal age for starting to read for all children. It's just the latest point by which very nearly all children are likely to be ready, so makes sense in a public education system in which one size has to fit all.

If you have a 3-year-old who wants to learn to read, and you have the time and inclination, you might as well start, IMO.

StepSideways · 15/03/2010 09:52

My sister's a teacher (living in canada now) and taught her DD to read quite well before she started school, unfortunatly she was so was ahead of the canadian kids it was absurd, she got bullied and now she has to home school her every day... on the other hand i would want my ds to be as academic as possible... touch choice..

starkadder · 15/03/2010 12:42

They start school at 3 in Spain. I live here.

emsyj · 15/03/2010 13:28

I could read at 3. I loved reading and still do. Reading isn't just a vehicle for education - I am shocked at the number of people on here who can't see the point of a 3 year old reading. Um, how about because it's FUN and ENJOYABLE??? To me, showing a child how to read and buying them books is no different from buying them some paints and a paintbrush and encouraging them to splash the paint around and have fun with it. There's nothing 'hothousing' about giving a child the pleasure of being able to read a book.

I wouldn't try to force a 3 year old to learn to read if he/she wasn't interested - but if the child IS interested, I would encourage it, same as I would encourage any other activity.

I do come from a whole family of teachers though! (not a teacher myself).

choccyp1g · 15/03/2010 13:38

Many,many years ago, I started school at exactly 5 and began to learn to read. This is fun, I thought, I'll show my sister when I get home. She was exactly 3 at the time, and picked it up with no trouble at all.

vesela · 15/03/2010 13:42

what a lovely story, choccyp1g!

30andMerkin · 15/03/2010 13:53

I was reading fluently at 3 and at home read everything the local libraries (x2) had in the childrens' section, then moved onto the 'pre-teen' books quite early.

The only problem was that my school insisted on everyone reading books in a certain order - but I didn't read all the basic ones because they were incredibly dull, and got caught out - they thought I couldn't read the books, when actually I just couldn't be arsed! - so make sure the teachers are aware of your DCs genuine reading level. Fortunately I had a very good headmaster who let me have free reign to read whatever I wanted from the 'big year' books.

I still read faster than most people (e.g. my husband, who I think of as FAR FAR cleverer than me) and think it's the most amazing gift to have, so I'd definitely encourage any toddlers to learn if they show any enthusiasm.

MathsMadMummy · 15/03/2010 13:56

I could read by 3 according to my mum, and she'd never heard of Phonics until recently. It was just a natural progression from her reading to me, then pausing at certain words which I'd memorised, which I do with my DD now.

The idea of not teaching a 3yo who actually wants to learn to read is crazy IMO, just go for it! My reception teacher borrowed her own daughter's books for me to read while the rest of the class learned the basics. My mum wasn't reprimanded for teaching me (as I understand, that does sometimes happen these days) and I wasn't bored.

30andMerkin · 15/03/2010 14:01

Er, just re-read my post and I don't mean I was reading teenage books at 3.... that would be a little inappropriate to say the least! Just meant I was a few years ahead of the year group all through primary school.

Couldn't do long division now if my life depended on it though!

doesntplaywellwithothers · 15/03/2010 14:16

I was 3 when I started reading, but I was interested, and have been a voracious reader ever since. My DS is 3 and though he loves books and being read to, he has absolutely no interest in being able to read himself at this point, and I'm okay with that...his motor skills are pretty advanced, so that's what his brain is choosing to excel at developing right now. I think if your DC is interested, then it's fine to start with sight words, or just working with letters...it doesn't seem like you're aiming to force him for YOUR benefit, so there's no harm.

BlueberryPancake · 15/03/2010 16:52

Well I didn't read before the age of seven (we start school later in my native country) and I don't think it did me any harm...

Nobody will convince me that children perform better if they learn to read early. Or that children who start reading later are not 'clever', 'intelligent', 'advanced'... I can speak fluently three languages and learning a fourth one, have had a very successful academic track record, and a good career. I have never felt that I was 'behind' anyone because I learned to read later!!

Having said that, yes I think it is clearly possible to teach a 3 year old to read, and am in the opinion that you should do it if she is interested. My DSs are much more interested in cars, superheros and trains! Only joking, they love books but show little interest in learning how to read. They make up stories by looking at the images and the oldest often 'reads' stories to us.

I will not teach my sons to read before they start school, but we are (my husband is a primary school teacher) making lots of efforts to make sure that they are 'ready' for learning to read - that they know their letters, understand how letters work together to make words, have an interest in books, encourage them to have good pen control, to have an interest in reading and creating stories, etc.

helyg · 15/03/2010 16:59

My three all started to read at 3, firstly by recognising commonly seen words and then moving onto working out words themselves. I have never sat down and "taught" them, but the house is full of books and they have always been read to, so I think it was a natural progression to start to want to read themselves.

spiderlight · 15/03/2010 22:35

According to my mum, I could read at 2 1/2 and had a reading age of 7 when I started reception. My teachers were brilliant and went out of their way to find me things to read that I'd enjoy, but nobody actually told me I was years ahead of my classmates and I distinctly remember thinking that I had different books because I wasn't as clever as everyone else and was behind

DS is nearly 3 and recognises lots of letters and a few words. We play with foam letters in the bath - he loves picking a particular letter to talk to him and seems to be picking the letter sounds up quite well that way. We don't push it, though - some nights he wants to talk to the letters, other nights he wants to throw cupfuls of water over the floor! It's tricky though - I don't want him to be bored at school, but I don't want to hold him back either.

ButterPie · 15/03/2010 22:46

The reading thing is why I am looking at HE tbh, the amount of people that tell me not to let her read as she doesn't want to stand out at school is shocking. Why on earth would I want my child's education to consist of trying to stay exactly average. She'll be good at some things, which will need encouragement, and not so good at others which will need help. I really need to go and quiz our local school on these issues.

VKschmeekay · 15/03/2010 22:48

DSs dad delights in him and his family relating tales of how he used to sit on his mum's bed reading excerpts from The Independent newspaper at the age of three, so yes, very plausible.

MathsMadMummy · 16/03/2010 08:34

Same here ButterPie (hello btw )
I am so lucky that my mum took the time to help me learn to read (and she wasn't pushy at all btw), as well as giving me an advantage, it's also full of special memories.

I don't want DD to be lost in a group of 30 kids, I want to go at her pace - whether that's faster or slower than average.

sandything · 16/03/2010 12:45

My daughter started reading at just turned 4, also loved books. I 'taught' her at first by reading to her and having trouble with some of the smaller simple words and she would help me out, ie "Mog was a happy c-c-c" and she'd read cat for me, before too long whe was taking over. Now whe is 5 and reads like an 8 year old! She is not bored in reception, she ends up reading stories to the other kids and loves it. I would really recommend Alan Ahlberg's red nose readers. I got a job lot on e-bay for a few quid, they start off at a real beginners level and they learn to read through the pictures and they really suit a young kid's sense of humour

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