Referal for speach and language terapy

[jenkins88]

Hi everyone.

My son who's 3yr 4mth old has been refered to a speach and language therapist. I received a copy of the letter that was sent to the clinic yesterday and I was a bit upset about what was written.

At the appointment where his speach problems were first raised I was a bit worried, but spoke to lots of other parents afterwards whose children had also seen a speach therapist. I started to think that it was just a slight hitch and would be fine after therapy.

The letter I got yesterday upset me because it seems as if they are saying that Liam is generally slow in everything. It mentions that he was a late walker (18 months), that he has single channel attention span and is very distracted. I don't know if I am being over-sensitive about this, but I'm so worried that this will lead to learning difficulties when he starts school.

I was aware that his speach was delayed and have previously asked his hv about whether it was a problem. She always reassured me that he was age appropriate and said she didn't think it was a problem.

He only ever pronounces the first part of a word. eg. dog - do, horse - hor. He can't say any words with the letter L in, which really upsets me because of his name. We have started calling him Lee all the time to make it easier for him but he pronounces it as Yee. He also has problems with vowels. Milk - mook, bye - bar. Has anyone else had any problems like this? Or does anyone have any experience of speach and language therapy for pre-schoolers.

Liam starts nursery in September and I'm really worried about it. I was told by the person who made the referral that it's important to get help immediately because otherwise the other children will exclude him from play. That broke my heart to hear that.

I'm also having problems with potty training and teaching counting and colours, hence why I'm worried about him having a whole host of other problems waiting for us. I keep thinking that the school are going to tell me that he's got problems when he starts at nursery.

Any advice or similar experiences would be great to hear. So sorry that it's such a long post.

Jennie

Ds2 sees the SALT at our local health centre. Ds2 has problems concentrating and tends to flit from one thing to another and is easily distracted by noise, light etc. (He has an initial diagnosis of autism). The SALT he sees is a community SALT rather than one specialising in behavioural problems. Ds1 saw the same SALT. Mizmiz will know a lot more than I do but I'm fairly sure that SALT training includes working with children with shorter attention spans or who may not be co-operative for whatever reason.

I think it was actually quite imaginative for him to say that the doll was dead. I don't know why anyone disapproved of this. It's not as though "dead" is a bad word. Liam sounds like a lovely little boy.

Thanks coppertop, I hope that is the case. It would upset me a bit if they said Liam's needs was beyond their scope. I'm totally in the dark about this at the moment, but I would have thought that attention span plays a big part in speech and language development, so hopefully this won't be a shock to the salt.

I didn't think 'dead' was so much of a terrible thing either. I don't use the word with him because I have never had to and I try to limit DP playing violent ps2 games to when Liam is in bed. I don't think he really understands what it means anyway. He just thinks it means you've been 'had' or 'shot' and so you have to lay down and stay still. I can't imagine any 3 year old having much of an idea about permanant death, if you know what I mean. She did make a big deal out of it though. She looked horrified and said 'noooooooooo, not dead, you dropped her'.

Had a great day with Liam today. I gave up on teaching colours as it doesn't seem that important at the moment, but we were just reading a book and he pointed to three red objects and said 'ren'. Well done Liam!!!

He sounds like a lovely boy.

I have a ds (who is now 3 and a half) and we have a friend with a ds who is exactly the same age. He too did everything on the latter end of the spectrum - walked late, talked late, took ages to potty train. When we first met them (I think around 2), he had no words. Then when he started to talk, he too missed the ends off the words and had great difficulty pronouncing words. They were referred for speech therapy.

He is now 3 and a half and is beginning to put words together to make sentences. His pronounciation is still not great but other people can now understand what he is saying. There are still several letters he can't pronounce but he has made such good progress that they think his speech will continue to develop with no extra help in its own time.

I sympathise with you about hearing other people praising their children. I was recently talking to the mother of this little boy and she told me he was now dry at night. When I told her that ds was nowhere near to being out of a nappy at night, I could actually see a little look of delight on her face - I know she didn't mean it in a nasty way but I think she had had it up to her neck with seeing specialists, speech therapists, dealing with school problems etc. etc. that she was actually ecstatic that her son had done something before a 'normal' 3 and a half year old. I made sure I made a big deal about how great her son was and she was almost in tears she was so pleased.

Sorry this is so long, but don't let this get you down. He sounds so charming your boy - I know it seems so easy to say, but don't worry too much about the others - you're getting him help now and that's the most important thing.

foxinsocks - thanks, that was a really nice post and reassuring too.

I can relate to your friends reaction to you being impressed. It would just be so great to hear someone say 'wow, he's really quick at that, isn't he?'. Pathetic I know.

My mum always manages to stamp on my pride when it comes to Liam. She says things that terrify me. Like she starts with a compliment, such as 'Liam's such a gentle child', and then adds something like 'his type always get taken advantage of'. She constantly compares him to his 6 year old female cousin. She was always very advanced with her language skills and I always gave so much praise about this to my mum (my sister has alot of problems with alcohol and eating disorders and violent relationships). But my niece hasn't got very good social skills and I feel is very withdrawn and unhappy. I wouldn't dream of saying these things because I know my mum would feel bad about it and she is only trying to do her best for the little girl. Sometimes I think my mum critisises Liam because she is aware of how secure and happy he is.

I must stop there or I will wind myself up so much that I will need to have a drink.

Jennie

Jennie - ime the gentle boys always get on well with the girls.

jenkins- accessing a specialised SALT can be a nightmare. Ds1 had to wait 3 years to see one (and then wne t ludicrously long times between appointments). We ended up going private and I went on some training courses myself.

Any chance of a private assessment? They give you stuff to do at home. My experience is that if your son does need extensive SALT work he won't get it (sorry, but reality and I wish someone had told me that right at the beginning, I wasted a lot of ebergy chasing services that didn't exist). I kept myself in with the NHS but my son's NHS therapist worked with his private one- that method worked well.

Assumedname - I think Liam would like that. He reserves his best behaviour for girls. With boys he likes to play monsters or play fighting. With girls he wants to play chase or kiss their hands. Bless him.

JimJams - At the moment going privately is out of the question. The unit who made the referal is miles aways from here (Oxford, we live in London), but they commented that I would really have to push as my area have got limited resources and tend to have long waiting lists and many children who need salt don't get it. I am intending to go back to work in September when Liam starts nursery. I'm hoping that he gets afternoons as DP is a postman so can pick him up so that I can work longer hours. Maybe then private would be possible. Hope this isn't too cheeky but could you give me some idea of costs. What training courses did you go on? I would be really interested in doing the same, but again it would depend on costs.

depends on the area- the cost of a private session is usually £55 per hour, but we were paying £35 when we had long term private SALT. Initially I paid for one session + report and then worked with him myself- I think that was around £90- but we're going back a few years. ASLTIP have a list of private SALTs.

Training courses- well I wish I'd gone on the Hanen programme (would have been free), but missed a place on that one (their book is very good). later did an Earlybird programme which is based on the Hanen and was good. (and free). Also did a workshop on verbal dyspraxia when Nancy Kaufman was visiing. It was good but not that useful in the end as ds2 turned out not to need SALT (he'd originally ben dxed witha speech disorder but sussed it out himself) and ds1 can't imitate yet. Now I spend our money on PECS workshops as they are always very professional, not too pricey and absolutely ideal for ds1. Ppint being there's lots out there that parents can access but worth tailoring to your childs needs.

Lots of books etc available as well with lots of advice. From your message I would say an assessment is the most important thing at this stage so that your child's needs are identified and you really know what sort of help he needs.

I second Jimjams.Wait for an assessment before worrying about what kind of (private or NHS)help Liam needs. one thing at a time eh?

Yes,jenkins,salt problems can and do get sorted,so don't think all is lost!!!!

I'm not sure about nephew's communication skills yet as he is only 18 mths,but everything seems fine. He also had torticollis (sp?) so his head was pulled to one side. My sister carried out his physio religiously and it really paid off.

Yes,most salts specialise in a particular field as it would be impossible to know about each area in depth. However,attention problems are very common,and well within the remit of probably 90 % of paediatric therapists.

As for the woman reacting oddly to the dead comment,well there are weird/uptight salts too!! I personally would think it appropriate and also understand that a child would use this without fully comprehending the concept of death.
As an aside,agree with you about minimising your son's exposure to violent computer games,which goes for all children.

Have a look at the AFASIC (asssociation for all speech impaired children) website,but don't get yourself in a state ok?????? Just keep on being the loving mother that you obviously are.