does your 3 year old have pocket money? or get money as a reward?

[elliott]

I've been wondering about this for a while and have been prompted by another thread to ask at what age your children became aware about shopping and money. I've noticed a few people mentioning using money as part of a reward system for children as young as 3 or 4.
my ds1 is 3yr and 3m and has only a very rudimentary understanding of money and shopping. he never asks me to buy him toys or sweets, and I don't think using money as a reward would have much meaning at the moment. We play pretend shopping and he will say things cost 'two pounds' or some such, and he calls coins 'pees' (so I guess he is picking up on 20p etc). Are most kids much more advanced in their understanding than this? Should I be teaching him more about money perhaps by giving him pocket money (though I don't know when we'd find time to go and spend it - wouldn't want it to go on sweets really)?

Yes I think the sweet thing is tricky. I don't even know how much sweets cost these days
I guess the options are to ban them from spending their pocket money on sweets (which imo kind of defeats the object of teaching responsibility for their choices) or put limits on how much they can consume and when (which is what I do at the moment with sweets from party bags), or only give them enough money to buy a quantity of sweets you are happy with.
I imagine I will start with pocket money between 4 and 5 (possibly together with the pasta jar method!) because on the whole I am in favour of teaching them that money is finite and that mummy and daddy cannot respond to every spending request.

Interesting thread though.

elliott, yes, I guess we are talkign about the same time... but don't sweets become cheaper and bigger in your memory? I'm sure Mars Bars used to be much bigger than they are today and only 3d! And we used to get a sixpence from the tooth fairy(that's 2.5p today, I think they kept that coin going after decimalisation she sadi hastily).
Seriously tho, if you want a game to teach somethign about how money works, can I recommend Pop to the Shops from the fab Orchard Toys range? You use 10p, 20p and 50p to buy items from various shops and mine love it. It says ages 5-9 but my 3.5 yr old can play it really well.

Also any money as gifts of £5 or over I bank, eg birthday presents. But if given a £1 "for ice-creams" on holiday for example I let him spend it.

ds1 and 2 are 5 and 3 and get pocket money - we started it when ds1 went to school at 4.4 and gave some to ds2 so he didn't feel left out. ds1 gets 1.00, ds2 gets 60p

They never spend it on sweets - they buy small toys when we go shopping in town. ds1 understand the value of the coins and can work out what he can afford to buy. It also stops the kids whining for toys etc as they know that they have to save up to afford things.

Also great for discipline - they lose 5 or 10 p for bad behaviour etc and earn extra pocket money for special effort - same principle as the pasta jar without the pasta

I've been giving ds (now six) pocket money since he was about 18 months, because I wanted him to learn as soon as he was able that you have to pay for things and nothing's free. About once a month I'd tell him that we could take some of his money when we went shopping and he could choose something to buy for himself (it was usually and Ertl Thomas engine for his collection, which cost around a fiver). As a result we've NEVER had a shopping tantrum over wanting something, because he's always understood from an early age that this week wasn't pocket money week but he could buy it next time. Mind you, we've had many an incident with shop staff when he's asked them to keep stuff for him till next week!

I haven't had a chance to read the other replies, but here is mine:

My ds1 is 4 in July. He gets 10p a night after tidying up his toys. We actually started this as a way of getting him to understand money, rather than as a reward thing. He collects them in his own purse and then we go and spend them once or twice a week on chocolate. He still only has a small understanding of value. But this is a good start. I don't really think of it as pocket money, but I suppose it is.

I was thinking about this today, when dd (nearly 4), looking at a catalogue we had lying around, said 'that's nice', followed by 'will you buy it for me' about several things on different pages. Wondered if, if she had pocket money, she would be able to save up for these objects of desire (though she likes really expensive things! It would take her months to save enough for them ...) Actually I don't think we will introduce it for several years because at the moment coins are just toys to her--and I think it would lead to her eating more, not fewer sweets (at the moment she basically doesn't get any except maybe for one from a party bag). But I do think she needs to learn that you can't just have everything you think is nice. Part of the problem is that her dad tends to buy her things all the time just because he likes them/ thinks she will like them. This is also how he goes about managing spending for himself, grrr. So I sometimes say no you can't have that, or make a mental note that we might get it for her birthday/christmas, only to find two weeks later he's gone and bought it for her.

She is not a brat by the way. Compared to some of her friends does not have all that much stuff really. Honest