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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

can your 4/o put on their coat by themselves?

39 replies

bunny2 · 26/01/2005 15:46

mine cant. at a meeting with his teacher today, she seemed to think this was really worrying.... can all 4 y/os put on their coats withou help?

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Ameriscot2005 · 26/01/2005 19:33

My 2 year old has no trouble with her coat, but some coats are easier than others.

Saker · 26/01/2005 19:48

My 5 year old ds1's teacher also mentioned that he was slow at dressing after PE, putting on coat etc. Tbh I think it's over-emphasised by the teacher because they are trying to keep a group of 30 odd kids moving and into the next activity. My ds1 just hasn't practised that much because I have just tended to get on with it for him and he has let me.

My ds2 is possibly dyspraxic and like Aloha's can't take his coat on or off. One tip someone gave me was to tie a ribbon in the zip to give them something extra to pull on when doing it up and down. Many coats come with something already.

Hulababy · 26/01/2005 19:55

My DD (2y 9m) can also put on and take of her own coat - BUT it has toggles with reasonably big loops. I think these are much easier than dealing with zips and proper buttons.

FineFigureFio · 27/01/2005 07:25

I am sorry but it really annoys me when people come on a thread like this, where bunny2 is concerned and say things like my 2 or 3 yr old can put on her/his coat. What is the point? she wants to know whether her son is unusual because he cant put on his coat, and she is concerned about that. She doesnt want to know how old your dd/ds was, she just wants to know whther her ds is unusual or not

Titania · 27/01/2005 07:27

my 5 year old still struggles sometimes. I wouldn't worry about it too much. They do things in their own time. I've always stood my ground in saying they develop at their own pace and you can't make them go any faster. They will get there in the end. take care x x

MrsBigD · 27/01/2005 07:35

dd (just 3) just started nursery and kids there are aged 3-4. As far as I can tell the oldest kids can do up their zips, but some are struggling. Don't blame them though... big bulky coat having to peek down to match up the zippy bits

DD probably could put on her coat if she tried a bit harder, but am sure nursery will teach her as they make them try first and then help them by talking them through it with some assistance.

I'm sure bunny your ds will be just fine.

I still have problems threading in my zips at times and I'm nearly 37!

Furball · 27/01/2005 08:10

FineFigureFio - bunny2s thread title asks the question 'can your 4/o put on their coat by themselves?' Then her post asks 'can all 4 y/os put on their coats without help?' Which is what everybody has answered.

HeyEnidYouveLostWeight · 27/01/2005 08:17

bunny2, my dd1 can just about put her coat on, she is 5. When she started school she couldn't do it herself and they did seem to make quite a big deal about it. Lots of other children could do it themselves - I was really surprised to see all these children putting their coat on with no probs! Anyway, it has never bothered me at all and as I say she is just about managing it now - she likes me to do it! dont worry x E

roisin · 27/01/2005 08:48

Bunny2 - have the school/nursery tried to teach her how to do it? For my boys the trick was having a coat with a hood, and putting the hood on first, then slipping their arms in.

FWIW I tried to persuade ds2 to put his coat on at home, but he never would even try. Then one day I was in school, and noticed him along with the rest of his nursery class (ages 3-4) putting their coats on by themselves! I was very embarassed, and immediately stopped doing it for him at home.

chocfreeclary · 27/01/2005 09:20

bunny, my 3.5 yo has just started to do her own coat (she's very independent). IIRC my 5.5yo DS1 could just about do his when he started school.
It is in a funny way a more important "ready for school" skill than reading, writign their name etc (which is what a lot of places seem to teach pre-schoolers)
DS1 (still often comes out of school with zip not done up.
Can your ds do his at all? ie get his arms in, is it just the zip/buttons etc that are the problem. I'm sure with practice you'll get there.
I'm more worried about little dd who starts school at barely 4 managing with tights after PE. I can hardly do mine and I'm 41!

Original poster

bunny2 · 27/01/2005 14:50

thaks again everyone. FFF, thankyou for your concern too It does worry me to see 2y/os are able to do something my nearly 5 y/o cant .

CFC, no ds cant get his coat on at all. he can get one arm in (often with the coat upside down) but has no hope of getting his second arm in. His school are assessing him at the moment, possibly he is on the autistic spectrum, and this is one of their concerns. I was quite suprised they were making an issue out of it hence the thread.

thanks again for your input everyone

OP posts:

Hulababy · 27/01/2005 19:34

Fio - IO only added my comment becuase I was explaining that toggles may well be much easy to fasten IME - and it may be one alternatove/option open. In other words if my 2yo can mange it then it must be an easier option, as she cannot manage zips and buttons. And I always type DD's age - out of habit on here.

sis · 27/01/2005 20:18

Bunny, I am so sorry you are going through the worry of this. In my extremely limited experience(ie from one son at school) schools seem to worry about raising any developmental concerns and especially about raising the possibility of autism without 'evidence'. In our case, it was the fact that our five year old son did not want to go on a school trip to a wildlife park without me. The school, I think, were worried that we would not take them seriously unless they had some evidence of why they thought he may be autistic rather than say, it was a gut thing or something they couldn't put into words, but that they 'knew' that there was some developmental issue.

With hindsight, I realise that the school did suspect that our son was on the autism spectrum but were worried about how we, the parents, would react so they used our son't anxiety about the trip to bring up the possibility of his being autistic. That is probably not what you wanted to hear but I thought that you should be prepared in case our situations were similar and apologies if they are not. FWIW, our son has since been diagnosed as possibly dyspraxic and/or autistic and/or having sensory integration disorder.

To answer your question, my son could not put his coat on at four - some of the children in his class could and others couldn't but he learnt by finding the hood and putting that on his head and then finding the sleeves on either side - I suspect the teachers had to teach him the technique as he did very little copying at that stage.

jodee · 27/01/2005 20:40

Hi Bunny, my ds is only 2ish months older than yours and he has really only "got it" since the start of this new term.Before that,if I held his coat up for him he would put it on back to front, and had no hope at all of getting the zip fastened, let alone doing it up. Something has now "clicked"; whether they have been showing him a different way at school or he has watched his classmates, I don't know, but he is now very proud of the fact he can do the zip up himself.

Are the school making an issue of it with him, or just mentioning to you (along with the other autism issues?).

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