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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

My year one five year old boy is at the standard of a new reception child

63 replies

fairyfly · 18/11/2004 11:17

12 months behind they have just informed me in an incredibly patronising manner. He is happy and has all his confidence back and now they are going to drop him back a year. What did i do to fight his corner burst into tears. How bloody assertive.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

beetroot · 18/11/2004 13:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

lou33 · 18/11/2004 13:56

we should go in as a team and watch them shit their pants

Original poster

fairyfly · 18/11/2004 14:35

We should go everywhere as a team and watch everyone shit there pants

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jellyhead · 18/11/2004 14:47

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fio2 · 18/11/2004 14:51

glad you are getting somewhere FF and it is so brilliant that you were so assertive with the head. i am proud of yoooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuu

Dingle · 18/11/2004 15:02

Haven't got time to read all of this but I am so sorry and angry for you FF.
My first thought was that if your ds is in Y1, did he not go to the Reception class at the school? Did this not get picked up on then?
How can they think that an IEP is not suitable for him (is that right?)surely the fact that they feel he is far behing enough to warrant the upheaval of moving him to another year,class where he has to establish himself with new friends...etc.
My dd(aged 3) has Downs Syndrome and although I am fairly new to the education system with SEN in mind I do know of some websites that might be of use with regards to setting up an IEP withing the school...and what you are entitled to.etc.
My ds is also in year 1 and I would be absolutely fuming if I had been treated this way.With regard to sickness, perhaps you could wrap him up in bubble wrap!!
be brave.....hugs, must go ,,,should be on the way to school.

tigermoth · 18/11/2004 19:54

ff, great you are standing up to this. I really don't know how schools judge these things. My 5 year old, august born son is slowly getting to grips with the academic demands of year 1, but I am sure others are way ahead. Makes me wonder if I too will get the teacher making similar suggestions about keeping him back a year. Things have changed so much recently. My oldest son, just a measly 5 years older, did not have half as much pressure on him to reach targets and perform in infants school.

tigermoth · 18/11/2004 19:56

ps - jellyhead, I must read that thread of yours!

Original poster

fairyfly · 18/11/2004 20:02

It's such a shame that other things aren't assessed, im really proud of his behaviour and social skills.
He was in reception yep dingle, i really think she was just being threatening this morning.
Tigermoth thanks.

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charliecat · 18/11/2004 20:04

My dds in year 2 and they have only jst started sending spelling home...dd can read very well but was spelling everything as it sounds...sensibly...as a lot of words are spelt rather oddly IMO...anyway rambling on, are they expecting too much of your ds? My dds 7 in 4 days BTW and it was only after half term spellings were started. Hugs x

Mum2girls · 18/11/2004 22:08

FF - I really feel for you, I'd have been just as 'assertive' as you, I'm sure.

You've been given lots of good advice but I'd just like to add (cos I'm mad on your behalf)- why do 'professionals' think all children of a similar age should develop at a certain rate? And how the hell can they say that he is '12', (not 10, nor 7 but 12, because it conveniently fits with an academic year), months behind' - bloody ridiculous.

We adults are all completely different, some of us cotton on to certain things far quicker than our peers, but are slower in other areas - why on earth should children be any different.

Original poster

fairyfly · 18/11/2004 22:13

Exactly! What if he happens to be a very practical person anyway, he will get discriminated from the begining. I wrote a thread about this a while ago and said it then but i would much rather have a secure boy than an insecure genius. I got my meeting anyway, next thursday, will need to visit this thread and get annoyed again before i go.

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codswallop · 18/11/2004 22:16

take a friend int o be a witness and to makenotes

codswallop · 18/11/2004 22:16

serouely
do it
you will forget bits afterwards

Original poster

fairyfly · 18/11/2004 22:17

Yep will do, i've been told that by popsy too, so i will listen and ask someone, otherwise its me and a load of proffs i suppose

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beetroot · 20/11/2004 10:11

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Original poster

fairyfly · 20/11/2004 10:14

its not till next thursday now as i wanted everyone there and not just the head. I had to make sure the ewo was availible

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Original poster

fairyfly · 25/11/2004 10:24

Can't really explain what went on at that meeting, it was all slightly pointless. My son is fine, he is catching up rapidly, he has no problems, he is just a slow learner. He is coming on leaps and bounds every week. They stressed us all for know apparent reason. I got told the work i do with him at home was working, he could do with not missing any lessons (no shit) and keep up the good work. My heads a bit scrambled, the teacher who told me he was doing terribly was obviously just in a stinking mood (just come back to work after a baby). She job shares and the other teacher said he was fab and she was proud of how well he is catching up. A complete and utter waste of time and worry.

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SantaFio2 · 25/11/2004 10:30

well i hope he continues to improve and be happy.

i cant understand the teacher being so degrading to him in front of all his classmates. Does make me feel a bit like she has come back to early or has POND as it is very unprofessional. hope they keep an eye on things at school

lisalisa · 25/11/2004 11:12

Message withdrawn

Original poster

fairyfly · 25/11/2004 11:33

Thanks so much lisalisa and i agree with you wholeheartedly. I am very happy with his progression especially his emotional and social development. I cant understand this pressure at five to be put in a pigeon hole academically. It goes without saying that any group of people will be at different ends of the spectrum with academic achievement. If you had a set of 18 adults it would be exactly the same. I know he is doing well and learning , just at a different speed, he has always taken a while to "click" but then he gets it immediately. It has been the same with a lot of things.
It actually infuriates me that it is even an issue at five. I really wish the system incorporated different systems that praised other aspects of a childs learning, I think he is a very bright boy, he understand a lot, he just can't read very well.
Good luck with your little one x

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lisalisa · 25/11/2004 11:52

Message withdrawn

popsycal · 25/11/2004 12:16

ff!!

for what it is worth, as a teacher myself, this is how I would want my ds to be - happy and making good progress what ever his ability. The first parents' evening i did as a teacher as havign ds i swore to myself that when i went to paretns' evenings in future, the first things i would ask were: is he well behaved, is he polite, does he show respect for people
then how is he doing academically

enjoy your lovely boy!

Original poster

fairyfly · 25/11/2004 12:18

Fantastic Analogy, love it!

OP posts:

Original poster

fairyfly · 25/11/2004 12:19

Sorry Popsy, posts crossed. yep i want him to be smiling above all else

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