a cheering story for parents of fussy eatrs

[ImNotInterestedInYourKids]

afetr two weeks int he land of steak frites dssnsees ds2(onfussy) eating steak

this is the boy who hates real meat( aart rom baconand lightly fried chicken strips) hates roast meals etcetc

sees ds2s steak.....

"that looks nice"

tries it
has had his first sirloin steak, thin cut, grill panned

FANTASITC! next stp roast beef. have nticed that this seems to be the way he starts wiht new food - he saw ds2 eatingan omeltte once at John lewis( now the dream job - being hte omleett man JL) nd then seems to want to ty it

I STILL maintian that he will LOVE food wen he is older as he has a relaly pronounced snese of taste

[growingbagpuss]

Haven't read all posts - but DS is obsessed with things being too hot - and won't eat til his meal is stone cold. Anything he has had a bad experience with ie too hot, he won't eat for months. We are just getting him to pasta again after nearly a year !!

He would live on fruit, loves ve, rice etc, but not keen on meat - so everything is chicke.,, chicken fish, chicken bacon, chicken lamb....

He is 2.8 and I still make him meals and freeze them, as often cooking as a family is too stressful, he refuses to eat and its a disaster.

When we go away, he usually starves himself for however long we are away, but at least this last time we went he did try thins, pasties, ham (hurrah -he now eats ham!!)..

[Mercy]

Agree re getting chippy. My mum in particular just goes on and on about it.

Are your fussy eaters fussy about anything else?

[TheArmadillo]

see that would enver work with mine, he'd rather go without cos it woudln't bother him not to eat.

WE have to use non-food stuff as reward, like having his photo taken or getting a sticker.

[growingbagpuss]

rewards don't work for us either - esp not food ones, he'd rather starve!!

[TheArmadillo]

oh I get annoyed at family events. He won't eat cos it's too different from usual (the place not the food). My mum goes on and on about it and makes him really stressed. I just think that if he's eaten something for breakfast then at least he's eaten that day and don't really mind whether he eats when out or not.

Last year on holiday ds basically refused to eat. THis year he ate something (usually a piece of bread) twice a day so big improvement.

Ds reacts quite badly to changes in environment - usually leads to him refusing to eat. But like dp he's a curious mixture of extremely laid back about some things and quite particular about others.

[tortoiseSHELL]

Ds1 is quite an anxious child - he had a real water phobia, and is very imaginative and sensitive about things - when he was about 2 he had a nightmare about wild animals and refused to leave the house for 2 days(!). It was very frightening for him and us - he could 'see' the animals and was jumping away from them and screaming 'no, no, get away from me' - pure terror. That took a bit of getting over, and he was afraid of dogs for a good while after that, although that's not a problem now. He never likes trying new things, not just food.

If I tried giving him food he wasn't comfortable with, he would get really stressed and anxious, which would prevent him from eating the food he did like - he can't eat when at all stressed or anxious.

[TheArmadillo]

same here - too much pressure leads to refusal to eat any food.

Any stress/anxiety leads to refusal to eat.

[tortoiseSHELL]

will try the pancakes to yorkshire puddings trick cod!

[tortoiseSHELL]

The pitying looks are annoying, but my family do the whole 'just give him a plate of food, if he's hungry he'll eat it, you just pander to him'. As do my friends.

[ImNotInterestedInYourKids]

yes or WORSE is the "How do you COPE"
god i am makgin him soudn freaky!! he is not that bad ont eh fussy front.
just lieka plain food ano not chewy meat


pizza, spag bol, mac cheese chick stir fry etcetc and now steak

[ImNotInterestedInYourKids]

no other phobisas is happy clever and confident kid

[KTeePee]

I was a fussy eater myself (as a child, not now) so am relaxed about my ds's being fussy - what I have found that has helped with ds1 (apart from the fact that he is older and you can now reason with him) is as Cod said to try things that are a bit like what he already likes...

Likes eggs and finally agreed to try bacon and loves it - so now will have an omelette with bacon in and even quiche Lorraine!

Likes burgers - so made meatballs (not in a sauce though)

and so on.....

[law3]

tortoise - sounds very similar to my ds, it goes beyound fussy or faded.

My ds eats
dry bread
strawberrys
coco pops (no milk)
smiley faces
yoghurts
McDonald chips
1 type of cake
1 type of sweet
no meat what so ever.

Specialist told me if he were in Africa he would have to eat rice or starve, so cut out all the stuff he would eat and he basically starved for 3 weeks. Specialist changed his mind rather sharpish!!!!

[ImNotInterestedInYourKids]

law i htink yours gtets fussygold medal

lets rebrand them " discerning eaters"

[ImNotInterestedInYourKids]

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/1374/396500

[law3]

lol ive thought about feeding him while his asleep or sellotaping food to his mouth

[TheArmadillo]

how old is yours law?

Sounds very similar to ds at his worse - he would eat cold dry toast, strawberries, bananas, plain yoghurt, raisins and digestive biscuits. And he wouldn't eat regularly.

He has improved loads over the last 1yr-18months - there is hope. He'll be 3 next week.

[law3]

armadillo - he is 3.6, he started as soon as i weaned him, would only eat a certain baby food and yoghurts. Everyone keeps telling me he will grow out of it, i hope so.

[tortoiseSHELL]

law - you're quite right, it isn't fussy really, it's beyond that!

Like the 'discerning eaters' tag!

My HV suggested now ds1 was older, waiting for the school holidays and then just not buying any of the food he liked, and telling him 'I'd run out of money so couldn't go to the shops to buy any more!!!!! '

cod, I hate the 'How do you COPE' as well. It's right up there with my dad's statement in the summer that 'he'd like to see ds2 walking by now' (he is 17 months) - felt like saying 'well tell him that then!'

I do find I get UNREASONABLY annoyed by my parents' comments on things like ds1's eating - much more so than if anyone else said it....

I get to be smug with dd - she is a complete dream, and literally eats anything and everything!

[tortoiseSHELL]

law - you could try dry foods like plain rice or pasta - if you give them completely plain as a finger food then he might try them - not so different to cereal?

If you do a search for 'musica' (which is my old posting name) then there are some threads about ds1 at that stage - I'll have a look in a bit for you as well. Ds1 was really terrible at that age - I remember him taking 1-2 hours to eat 1 spoonful of cereal.

[TheArmadillo]

The one thing that has kept me going was that over 90% of children, no matter how extreme, begin to make a lot of progress between the ages of 5-7 (NHS figures). In our case that was the reason that we were refused any help with ds.

I used to do a lot of research on it as I didn't know anyone else who had had a child as extreme as ds and no one could give me any advice. It was extremely isolating at the time.

Ds refused solids for ages - he hated them. We had about a month where he would eat anything as long as it was fruit/veg and then went to eating practically nothing.

He suffers from extremely bad constipation (god knows how - he drinks like a fish and eats mainly fruit and veg ) and this really hasn't helped.

[law3]

Tortoise - its frustating i know, ive seen one specialist after another and start from square one with things ive tried a hundred times before. With the 'its your own fault' attitude. My son has to take medication, iron, calcuim etc.

Ive resigned myself to if he will only eat dry bread, i stand no chance of him tucking into a spag bol or something.

I make his breakfast, lunch, dinner of whatever we are having everyday and live in hope

[onefootinthegravy]

I love these threads - its so refreshing to hear about others in the same boat.
My dd 4.6 will not touch meat/cheese or eggs in any shape or form what so ever.
She actually has a totally disgust for meat to the point its has become a complete repulsion to her.
She has been known to come into the kitchen when I've been cooking meat or fish with the air freshner and spray it around (this started when she was 2.5!!) She hated it far before she knew where meat came from and now the realization has kicked in where meat comes from it's even more of a no no!
We have no veggies in our family, but I just have to go with it.....I don't pressure her.

[TheArmadillo]

oh and I also wish I'd known that a toddler/pre-schooler can survive well on the equivilent of a boiled egg a day.

I'm guessing you've tried the getting him involved with shopping/preparing food, no stress at mealtimes etc etc.

The one thing that made a big difference to ds was no pressure to eat. We laid his food down in front of him and told him (repeatedly) that he didn't have to eat it if he didn't want to. This actually made him eat better because it made the whole situation very relaxed.

He gets a photo taken for each mouthful which are put up on the wall (he loves having his photo taken). Also stickers etc. All very positive and thigns you can show gps/visitors when they come roudn. Also he could phone granma if he'd eaten really well adn tell her that kinda thing.

[law3]

i also find if on the rare ocassion he does try a new food, like a piece of orange, he has to then drop one of the regular foods. ie orange will replace strawberries.