8 year old dd questioning the existence of Father Christmas - what should I say??!!

[cruisemum1]

My dd will be 9 in January and is seriously questioning the validity and logistics of there being a Santa. She has no older siblings to spill the beans but obviously some of her school friends are wised up already! Don't know how to tell her as she said the other day "Mummy, Ellie said Santa isn't real, you wouldn't lie to me would you?" I think she kind of knows but still wants to believe. Advice please.....

I ask my dd1 & 2 what they would like to believe. And look in mock horror when they say FC doesn't exist. So I think they know he doesn't, but that mum gets a kick out of pretending he does.

I hope they continue to humour me for many years to come. DD1 (11) rolls her eyes at me and thinks its all a bit beneath her (but just wait till Xmas eve...)

DD3 (3) is just becoming aware that there's this fat bloke who comes down the chimney and leaves a stocking at the end of their bed and a present under the tree.

I too was brought up to believe that FC delivers presents on behalf of the giver rather than providing them himself.

When my children started asking questions I just said well what do you think and left it up to them. My eldest was nearly 8 when she started asking and she decided herself that he didnt exist. The other two were ao ans 11 before they dtopped believing. I think it was easier for them as in our family Father Christmas only brings the stocking presents. They have always nknown where the b1g presents come from.
At 18, 16 and 13 they still love tp pretend. They always hang their Christmas bags up and leave stuff out for the Father Christmas and his Reindeer! I asked them this year if they stil wanted a stocking and they said of course they did!

That shuold have ben 10.16( almost 170 AND 14(almost)15. I can't even remember my kids ages now!

DD aged 5 has started questioning it lately.

The explanation of it is magic just doesn't make sense to her

Although they know I buy the presents, they have been told FC delivers them.

Last christmas one of my 7 year old twins didn't believe and the other did. This year I think both don't but I'm not sure. He hasn't asked. They just turned 8.

Agree with Emmylou - dd1 and dd2 definitely know now, not sure about dd3, but all keep up the pretence because 1) they won't get a present from him and 2) they know I love the whole Christmas Eve thing, putting mince pies and carrots out and sneaking stockings upstairs etc.
Long may it go on!

Fleeting keeping-up-pretence panic crossed my mind at the thought of one twin believing and the other not...

I would tell her the truth is she is questioning it. She knows already by the sounds of it.
Ds was 8 when he asked outright.It was really sweet actually...he said 'do you mean you and dad have been buying all those presents for me for all of these years!? Thanks mom!!'

She knows already. But she'll still sulk when you tell her the truth

What do you mean 'what do you say'...?

I'm confused.
Why would she question the existence of someone who is so famous?!

Might as well question the existence of the Queen, or Jimmy Saville...

You can either show her The Polar Express (fab film imo) or you can confess. My ds asked when he was about 6 or 7 iirc (he's 9 now) and I told him so I'm amazed at those with older children who haven't sussed it, although I am aware that plenty of children is his class do still believe.

I'm one of those who wishes she'd never gone along with it in the first place and who thinks the whole FC is a load of pants! But I ahve debated this long and hard here before, can't be arsed tonight!

when I questioned my dad, he kind of held his hands up but kind of didn;t. he said there wasn't a real father christmas in teh sense of a person like us, but that he was "make believe". he said that "make believe" was something very special - if you thought it and believed it then there was a sense in which it was real - it was real, to you, in your head. he said that he still thought there was a make believe FC. [obviously - just in case you're in doubt - this is a load of old shite that's only a hair breadth away from the original old shite we spin them about a real fc - but it was a gentle interim phase for an 8 year old. and one of the few things that makes me think my dad was not so bad after all]

Is there not a tradional St Nicholas story that you could tell her that is a bit more 'real' than Father Christmas?

Zeph - that is a great idea! Maybe I could ask her teachers if there is one recommended. As we now have ds -who is obviously too young at the moment being only 11 weeks - she could keep the magic alive for him.