Who's methods to you rate more ????

[nutcracker]

A) Supernanny

B) Dr Tanya Byron

and why ??

saadia, yes agree re all those flipping wall charts (and sn is very loud)

I think Tanya is a goddess and should be bowed to all the time you are in her company . I know the nanny who took ove suppernannys job and by god the things she told me .

I like Supernanny, but Dr Tanya wins hands down.
I think Tanya, as a pyschologist,recogninses the underlying issues to the problem.

Def Dr Tanya. She's so lovely and exudes gentle firm patience, she speaks respectfully & with compassion & intelligence to both parents & kids, whereas I was shocked the 1st time I saw sn & she was bellowing at some kid & yelling "naughty" at it. Didn't like her approach at all.

tanya, deffo. I like the cut of her neckerchief.
Supernanny is fine but a bit too simplistic. I don't the "the naughty step" either.
nutcracker Why would you not say please when yuou want children to do something??? I always try to say please, at least the first three or four times I ask... surely it is modelling respect and good manners?

Deffo, Dr Tanya.
For several reasons... I like the fact that she is a clinical psychologist, and she does attempt to get to the heart of the problem, whereas I feel that SN just does a patch up job, without really addressing the issues as to why they got there, so I feel they are much more likely not to continue / or for the underlying problem to manifest itself in other ways.

I like the fact that Tanya always shows respect for the parents and the children, whereas SN can be really quite patronising at times, and quite rude to some of the parents.

I like the fact that with Tanya, it is called Time out rather than naughty whatever. I have read a lot about the damage that can be done if a child is stereotyped / stereotypes themselves with the label 'naughty' which is so easy to so!

Yes, I understand the door thing, but having a two year old I can fully see why. There is no way on earth that my 2 year would willingly sit on any bottom step for 2 minutes!

Also, I can't get past the fact that SN can't say 'acceptable'. It grates me every time!

And whilst House of TT, in the past Dr T has done some fab things with teenagers and older children in the 'little angels' series.

Oh and finally, her stuff really does work! My DD is not a faddy eater, but she won't try new foods and the whole lick it / little bite / big bite progression is fab!

Sorry, that was a bit evangelical wasn't it?

There was a chap on this morning last week, a new specialist of theirs i think, works on a principle that involves a lot of love bombing. that approach certainly seems to work better with my three,and I feel a lot more positive about administering it.

I would say we're fairly disciplinarian though 9within normal limits) so i think it's a case of filling the gaps in your parenting style rather than a one size fits all approach.

love bombing? What's that?

Completely agree with the 'acceptable' thing. It's really grating and has become a joke in our house

Love bombing is about totally smothering a child in love. Spending a few days making them the absolute nothing else centre of your world, cuddling them constatntly and I guess building up a special security. After doing all the naughty stair stuff with my lads (esp. ds1 who has sn and sdoens't get it) I tried the love bombing and it seemed to help.

It's also, i would suggest, much less dangerous in the wrong persons hands than someone labelling their kid as naughty.

Oh yes, and it's lovely to do too.

dd gets smothered several times a day and actually the cuddles irritate her! I have to choose my moments or i get pushed away! I made up a cuddle song which she loves "it's nice to have a cuddle with dd, it's nice to have a cuddle and a hug." Also play cokey cokey holding her and pretending to drop her down etc at the cokey cokey bit... but a random cuddle she just can't be bothered with!

I felt the same about the naughty mat, hardly ever use it now and last time i did i had to do time out, as i said a while back in thread. A sticker chart worked wonders and turned discipline into a positive experience. I do put her in her room without shutting the door though if she is throwing a strop about not getting what she wants, or just continuously moaning & crying & can't snap out of it "You can come out when you have stopped crying/shouting/moaning" -works wonders too, within 2 minutes she's back out of the room calm & ready to continue playing or whatever - or she's been distracted by her toys in her room. I think that's another way she has learnt a bit of self control, even if it's not how to stay put on the naughty mat! . Interestingly enough she hardly ever comes out of her room still throwing a strop [confused emoticon]