could your three year old do this?

[Kelly1978]

I have niggling concerns about ds. He has always been slow to meet developmental milestones, I really jsut put it down to his personality. He is also quite quirky. He is three now, and I have 7 mnth dts who are middle of the road and making me realise jsut how odd ds is.
Last night, for example, I thought he had gone to bed when his sis did. He doesn't always come for a kiss beforehand - he isn't fussed about it. Well, three hours later I was off to bed, and went to the downstairs loo and there he was standing there. He had been in there all that time, doing god knows what. He wasn't uopset, or stuck, jsut in his own little world. That can't be right can it?

ds has now developed a new obsession with a new pair of bob the builder wellies. I've had to lock the door as he keeps putting them on and has already headed out with them on once! He said he was going to get a drink. Not sure why that meant he had to go to the wheelie bin! He isn't naughty - he genuinely doesn't have a clue.

I'm desperately waiting to hear back from the school admissions for dd. I was hoping she would start this wqeek, but it doesn't look like it now.

He sounds like a poppet, kelly.

Bless him!

I have read this thread with great interest, he does need some help and to be seen by someone who knows, instead of trying to guess. Try to push him into getting some help and you will put your mind at rest!

Good luck and best wishes!!

just an quick update - the hv saw ds today and is referring him for assesment. Not sure what this means, but it must be a step in the right direction. She's coming back on wednesday to fill out forms, so I'll be able to ask more then.

hi Kelly, I've read this topic with great interest - I'm new to these boards. what I would say is this, a mother always knows when something is not quite right, I guess it's a maternal instinct thing, don't be fobbed off by anyone, if you genuinely think that there's a problem, then now is the time to get it checked out. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to overcome any potential problems.

There is one other thing to consider - have you had your son's hearing checked? does he ever not understand what you are saying? I have a cousin who became partially deaf at 18 months due to a medical procedure (long story which I am sure I will tell at some point ), and his parents never picked up on it till he was about 3 because he learned to lipread! it was only when he went to nursery that it was picked up because he wasn't listening to basic instruction. Delayed speech and inability to communicate can also be attributed to hearing problems.

good luck

thanks sugarbaby.

A lot of people have suggested it might be his hearing, which drives me nuts actually. He responds fine when he wants to, can hear if I whisper his name, etc. I really don't think he has a hearing problem. The HVs keep on at me though, because he has never passed a hearing test. They do those ones where they make a noise and the child/baby is supposed to look round? Well, ds looks round once, sees the flashign clown or whatever, then refuses to respond a second time. He jsut sits there with a mutinous expression on his face. He can hear them perfectly well, I can feel/see him twitching, but he refuses to look.

do you not put him to bed?

Most of the time he disappears on his own when he is tired. He isn't particularly affectionate, so never asks for kisses and cuddles, jsut takes himself off to bed. It's nto even late, bedtime is 7, but he normally disappears sometime between 6-7, during the wind down reading hour we have.

hv and nursery nurse came today. They found him very withdrawn, though he was actually on a good day and qute chatty. Had a terrible weekend where he wouldn't talk at all, but monday was great he went to a new mother and toddler group and loved it. He's got to go to three appointments with a pediatrician and team next, prob after xmas. So we'll see what happens there.