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So why do people choose a "proper" name...

93 replies

3andnomore · 15/02/2008 23:52

only to shorten it at Birth?
What is it about calling a Baby Amilai but never using the name, but using Millie, or Benjamin but always calling them Ben...
I mean, why then not just call them Millie or Ben?
Surely if that is the name you want to call your child...
Obviously I do realise that nicknames can evolve through the childs life, but this whole "premeditated" giving it a long (proper) name and nicknaming it at birht something else is sort of , erm....pointless...and kind of really annoying? (I do realise that might jsut be me, lol...that gets annoyed, I mean...but I ratehr encounter a "chavvily" named child but it's actually the name, then a Ben really called Benjamin

OP posts:
TillyScoutsmum · 16/02/2008 09:30

I wanted my dd to be able to have a choice when she's older. I like her full name (Matilda) and do use it sometimes, but at the moment, she is mainly Tilly. Perhaps she'll feel its a but "childish" when she's older and will want to use her full name. Or perhaps, if Matilda is going to become such a popular name as everyone suggests, if there are more than one in a class, she can be a Tilly, or Mattie, or Tildy or other variations. Not something you can do with Jack....

AdamRomANTic · 16/02/2008 09:31

What a wanky OP. Why do you care?

23balloons · 16/02/2008 09:33

I have a Benjamin and fully intended for him to be called Benjamin NOT BEN. However when he started school his teacher insisted on changing it to Ben and of course when he discovered how much easier it was to write Ben than Benjamin he started to use Ben himself. People who knew him before he started school still refer to him as Benjamin. Now his teacher a few years later has decided to use Benjamin again but unfortunately it is too late as he is now Ben. I don't think I called him Ben once ever for the first 4 years - so stop picking on Benjamins .

littlelapin · 16/02/2008 09:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

princessosyth · 16/02/2008 09:39

I really like Kitty for a girl but we would definitely have her official name has Katharine then she can choose when she is older.

Pollyanna · 16/02/2008 09:43

I can't understand why people get so bothered about this tbh. I don't care what other people call their children, but I personally prefer to register my children the full/traditional name. So I have a Charles, and an Alexandra - neither are necessarily called that at the moment, but may be in the future.

DualCycloneCod · 16/02/2008 09:50

you really called her maisy rae?

littlelapin · 16/02/2008 09:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

preggersagain · 16/02/2008 09:55

i have a good friend who is a rather well respected local business woman- she dreads going to functions and being introduced as 'Charlie' it makes her feel like 4yo, and constantly says she would like a proper name to fall back on- an often uses Charlotte

chunkychips · 16/02/2008 09:59

Sorry I wasn't around at 2.00 am when it all kicked off, but I meant distinguished in they can tell them apart. I just think that people should think long term before choosing a name, they're all cute when they're babies, but a grown up with a cutesy name might not be taken seriously and don't you want your children to have a choice? You see a name written down and most of the time you have a personality in mind to match it. It can be a good or bad thing, but it's just what happens. I think naming your child is a serious responsiblity and fashion shouldn't really come into it too much.

ZippiBabes · 16/02/2008 09:59

i always think i am getting told off if someone uses my full name

i actually find it weird that [people dont call me zippi i have got so used to it even my normal shortened name seems a bit alien

chunkychips · 16/02/2008 09:59

Is being called old fashioned an insult?

maisiemog · 16/02/2008 10:00

I prefer to have a longer name with diminutives, I have a love affair with names and like the flexibility of longer names, often providing, a large number of options. Mind you, not all long names, provide a large number of options, but some are fantastic, such as Elizabeth or Margaret, both have a huge number of pet forms.
I agree with little lapin that it is nice to have a 'little' name for small children and to allow them a more grown-up or 'cool' option when they are bigger. My little boy is Alfred and I'm sure he will become 'Al' when he is in secondary - we call him little Alf and Alfie.
I am glad I don't have an abbreviated name, because I know I would find it boring - but that's me. Some short forms of names stand better than others e.g. I would find it funny to meet someone called 'Ed' and then discover that it wasn't short for something. On the other hand, I think Archie stands alone quite well, and Archibald might be a bit too trendy for a lot of people (including me).

hecate · 16/02/2008 10:01

What I want to know is why people call your child a nickname that is NOT EVEN a shortened version of their name.

For example, ds1 is called by some 'Gerry' My mother started it and it spread.

Like the plague or something.

His name is not Gerald. His name doesn't even have a 'G' in it. Or an 'e'. or an 'l'. or a 'd'. No 'y' either and only 1 r. doesn't rhyme with gerry or gerald. ends in a 'th'.....

Tell me what THAT'S about, go on.....!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bluebutterfly · 16/02/2008 10:03

My ds has a proper name which I shorten sometimes. It is a nickname. Still use his full name alot too though. I like the flexibility...

Bluebutterfly · 16/02/2008 10:05

Also, some people call their dc a name to honour a relative etc, but prefer the shortened version. I think that that is a nice thing to do.

meridian · 16/02/2008 10:19

Ds has a proper name we use his propername but do call him "H" at times .. I have a short name and always wanted to be able to have a nickname.. so wanted DS to be able to choose if he wants to be called by his prorper name or a shortened version which he may grow out of as an adult... my cousin is named Candice so as a kid it was "Candy" which is an adult limits people taking you serious.. are there any doctors named Candy? Lawyers? though maybe a fastfood clerk or a hooker.. no offence to hookers or fast food workers.

its all about choice.. but it becomes thier choice in the end. My dad is named Peter, his dad was too, my dad refused to answer to anything but his proper name, as he loathed "Pete" or "Petey"

berolina · 16/02/2008 10:52

I know a child who is just Ben, short for nothing. He doesn't even have a middle name, and somehow I find it quite sad that he has so little name ikywim. I do like Ben, though.

My parents did as described in the OP. I am universally known by Short Name but use Proper Name professionally, e.g. for publications, and am quite glad to have it.

3andnomore · 16/02/2008 11:35

Oh dear got all fighty there for a moment.

I think it must be more a british/english language thing....it doesn't seem to exist like this in germany, maybe that is why I feel it's odd....I mena, of course in germany people have nicknames, lol, but they are a matter of developement, rather then, oh lets call our child Rebecca so we can call her Becky...!

OP posts:
3andnomore · 16/02/2008 11:37

23 balloons, wasn't picking on Ben/Benjamin, indeed it's one of the names that I think sounds lovely either way, and obviously with your Ben/Benjamin it was the natural developement of name shortening, rather then you calling him Benjamin, but then only ever calling him Ben, iykwim

OP posts:
3andnomore · 16/02/2008 11:38

berolina, that is why my Kids have middlenames...I only have 1 first name and I hated that....so, my poor children are lumbered with 3 first names -first name personal choice and the middlenames are names from loved ones.

OP posts:
RedFraggle · 16/02/2008 11:49

I think full name on paper-work and then use shortened name as you wish when they are babies. At least then they have the option when they are older.
I personally hate the current trend for calling people by contractions. But that's only my opinion!

3andnomore · 16/02/2008 11:56

"calling people by contractions"- what do you mean by that [dim emoticon]

OP posts:
AdamRomANTic · 16/02/2008 12:03

"calling people by contractions" - is that naming your DCs Oooooooooooooowwwwwwwww!!! and IWannaEpiduuuuuuuuuuraaaaaaaaaaalllll"?

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 16/02/2008 12:03

Both DP and I have names that can be (and are) shortened. Our parents use our full names, but friends use different forms of our names.

My name is Samantha, but my best friend and dp both call me Sammy and I love this term of affection from them. However if anyone else was to use it I would probably vomit

I like having an adaptable name.

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