I know MIL threads are everywhere here at the moment but I genuinely don’t know if I’m being precious or if this is actually a reasonable thing to feel strongly about. DS is 13 months old. From the beginning I've put a lot of thought into his play space. We have lovely open-ended wooden toys, rainbows, stacking rings, sensory bits, simple puzzles, instruments, lots of books, Duplo, animal figurines sort of thing. He absolutely loves them and will happily play independently for good stretches. His keyworker at nursery has also commented on how well he concentrates for his age.
MIL visits every couple of weeks and without fail arrives with a bag of VTech type toys. Flashing lights, tinny music, buttons that shout colours at him in an American accent. DS clearly finds these overstimulating and often cries at the blaring noise but MIL takes this as evidence he’s bored and needs to learn to get used to it. But I’m an adult and also find it overstimulating so I’m not surprised he does too.
I've tried the gentle approach. "Oh we're trying to keep things a bit calmer for him." She laughed and said the wooden toys are boring. I’ve tried the vague “oh we’ve got loads already, no need!” I’ve sent her his wishlist with things he’d actually love. She ignores all of it and turns up with another piece of plastic playing a tinny version of The Wheels on the Bus. I've also tried mentioning that open-ended play helps their imagination and concentration and that overstimulation can affect sleep but she told me I spend too much time online.
So am I being unreasonable? Has anyone actually managed to get a grandparent to respect this kind of boundary or do I just need to accept that the tat mountain is coming and become our charity shop’s biggest donor?