Positive stores with speech delay - really stressed

[chasingpirates]

Not sure what I’m looking for other than reassurance and to hear some positive stories.

I know all children are different but it would make me feel better as I’m losing sleep and constantly thinking about my DS3 development.

We are expecting he’s autistic. We have an assessment coming up in a few weeks.

He is a gestalt language processor (talks in chunks of language/phrase).

He hashundreds of words and some long phases (up to five or six words) and he uses pretty much all of them in the right context.

He sometimes responds to his name, his eye contact is on his terms, he really struggles to follow instructions. It’s like we’re not saying them. If we say “get shoes on” he might do it but if he wants to go in the garden he’ll rush to get them. If we say “bath time” he’ll run upstairs or “dinner time” he’ll be there straight away so he must have some understanding.

He has zero conversation. He might say something related but never answers. The closest is saying “no” to bedtime.

He has rarely pointed or waved. He has started to line things up and ocassionally spins or flaps his hands but sometimes that’s less than once a day so not obsessive at all.

He’s happy in loud busy places and plays alongside other children but doesn’t really seek out play and if he does it’s more rough and tumble sort of play.

He can count to 10 but I think he’s just remembered the sequence. I think he’s just about starting to recognise colours but it’s very unreliable and possibly coincidence when he’s pointed to one and got it right. He doesn’t sit still enough to concentrate on any of this.

He’s having private SLT which is helping a bit. He’s had a hearing test, that was all fine.

I’m just so worried about his future. Will he ever talk? Will he ever be independent? Will he ever be potty trained (showing no signs yet).

I’m sorry, I know nobody can answer these questions. I think I’ve lost it tonight.

If anyone has any positive stories I’d be so grateful.

Thanks and sorry for the lengthy post!

Thanks @AnotherName2025 The advice seems to be say less such a “drink please”. I think that’s helping.

Trying my best not to worry x

He sounds like my DS at that age. Only mine had sensory issues and was prone to running away randomly, always looking for an escape route. He spoke in echolia only, could recite parts of a TV show (in the accent of the show) but couldn't piece a sentence together. Diagnosed with autism at 3. Between 4 and 4 and a half it was like by magic everything improved dramatically and he started to catch up very rapidly. By 5 his issues were manageable and unrecognisable from 3.

He had some behaviour issues in primary school mostly interrupting by shouting out an answer or talking back. He needed fidgets and was able to find strategies to keep himself sitting down. He was later diagnosed with ashd so no surprise there. Home life was difficult. He was hyper, quite disruptive when young and argumentative when older. He is now 18 and is a little old for his year due to starting late and speech delays. The autism is pretty invisible, he is popular and sociable and has good social skills. He is very charming. He isn't doing his final exams (A level equivalent, we are not in UK) until next year. He is a straight A student and is very clever but also works really hard at what doesn't come easy. He plays at a senior level in a local sports team where there is a lot of local status and pride. He trains almost every day and studies around this. He works 1 evening a week in a hotel and has a Summer job lined up. He has worked Saturday jobs since 17. He has his drivers licence and uses my car as he wishes. Honestly to the outside world he is a golden boy and a high achiever. At home he can still be tricky to manage but he is an amazing in his determination and work ethic. The plan is university and something in finance. He is absolutely capable of independent living and the future is very bright for him.

All the boys in family , bar one who has a different grandad) are very very slow to talk and have a mix of adhd/autism/global delay. I describe it as “front loaded” struggles as it’s always been very worrying for the first 4-5 years but then they slowly improve. My own two sons, and 3 nephews across two siblings were exactly the same. But every single one of the has improved massively around age 6-7. My eldest son and my eldest nephew are incredibly intelligent despite being non verbal until they were 5. Both passed all of their GCSEs with flying colours. My two younger DNs are both still in school and are doing well although the youngest is in a special unit as he struggles with a diagnosed language processing disorder and has an EHCP. Currently going through similar struggles with my 4 grandsons age 1-5. But again, with SALT and a very sportive nursery and school team and also with us having so much history through the family we’re know per much exactly what to ask for in terms of support so we are very lucky that the over loss will benefit from the stuff wet went through 20 years ago.

Honestly, don’t lose hope. What your situation looks like today, a won’t necessarily be the same tomorrow or in a month or in a year. I was and still am often surprised at what a difference a few weeks can make and how rapid progress can be.

5mthf drops. methylated multi vitamins and a good multi amino acid supplement has really helped in our family too.