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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think a part time job should be part time?

52 replies

autumnbreez · 20/09/2025 06:19

Do you work part time and if so how flexible are you expected to be? This is my second part time role since having my DC and I was employed to work 3 days per week (9-5). Since joining I’ve been asked to cover sickness/holidays and just random days my colleague cannot make it into the office. This is an office based job and the second time this has happened to me in a role. I have said yes every time I’ve been asked (mainly because I don’t like to say no) but I am a single parent and the stress of constantly trying to find childcare and not spending time with my child (long commute) is really starting to get me down. Is this normal for part time jobs? This is one of the reasons I left my last job.

OP posts:
GreyCarpet · 20/09/2025 08:39

I have said yes every time I’ve been asked (mainly because I don’t like to say no)

This is the actual problem.

They can ask; you can say no.

From their perspective, the fact you say yes every time has led them to believe you're happy to do it. Maybe you like the extra money on those occasions?

They asked on the off chance; you have snapped up the opportunity every time.

How is anyone to know you don't really want to do something you willingly agree to every time you are asked to do it?

Original poster
autumnbreez · 20/09/2025 08:39

When I cover they give me the option to either take the days back as holiday (usually not that week) or be paid). This isn’t the problem, but I not asking for more holiday or more money. I just want to work part time and feel there are no part time jobs that stick to the contracted hours! For those asking if there is any inconvenience the answer is yes, a huge inconvenience and a huge amount of stress trying to find childcare at the last minute as well as missing out on time with my child (this is what matters most to me).

OP posts:
Needlenardlenoo · 20/09/2025 08:41

Just say no then. Tell them (once) you'll do it if they pay for the childcare and watch them scurry away.

Evaka · 20/09/2025 08:44

Sorry OP. Your post is ridiculous, of course they'll lean on you to fill gaps if you keep saying yes. 'I can't I'm afraid' is all you need to say. Practice saying it and also ask yourself what you think will happen if you say no. Spoiler- nothing at all.

GreyCarpet · 20/09/2025 08:47

autumnbreez · 20/09/2025 08:39

When I cover they give me the option to either take the days back as holiday (usually not that week) or be paid). This isn’t the problem, but I not asking for more holiday or more money. I just want to work part time and feel there are no part time jobs that stick to the contracted hours! For those asking if there is any inconvenience the answer is yes, a huge inconvenience and a huge amount of stress trying to find childcare at the last minute as well as missing out on time with my child (this is what matters most to me).

Just say no then.

Honestly, why do some people make their lives so difficult?

This is about you, OP. Not them.

Megifer · 20/09/2025 08:48

Does your contract say anything about overtime/covering others being compulsory?(just check that before you say no!)

Amonthinthecountry · 20/09/2025 08:49

Have you passed your probation? If so, I’d just start saying no. If not, I’d carry on as you are until it’s signed off.

Allthings · 20/09/2025 09:03

Unfortunately the problem is not with the company, but with you always saying yes. Not only are you saying yes, you are making life more difficult for yourself at the same time.

I would suggest that you think about what you want from this job and the hours you are prepared to do. It is fine for you to stick to your contracted hours. But if you are happy to do some occasional extra hours you need to be clear about how many you are prepared to do and how much notice you need to be able to put suitable arrangements in place.

Greenwitchart · 20/09/2025 09:10

I have worked part time for years due to a health condition and I have never been ask to work extra. I would have said no anyway.

WhamBamThankU · 20/09/2025 09:13

I’ve said YABU because you just need to say no if it doesn’t suit you!

ladybirdsanchez · 20/09/2025 09:16

I think it depends on the job. I work PT (4 days a week) and I can't envisage ever being asked to work on my non-working day or cover for a colleague, but my job is not a support role.

What does your contract say, just out of interest? Does it say that you will be expected to be flexible about the days/hours you work?

Fleur405 · 20/09/2025 09:18

Repeat after me “Sorry I don’t have childcare so can’t come in on my non working days”

I work 4 days a week and sometimes do work on my non working day but I only do it if it suits me (I am going to a conference next week which I do want to go to) and if I can take a different day off that week. Because you always say yes you make it easy for them to just assume you will do it.

NerdyBird · 20/09/2025 09:20

I’ve worked pt for years. I do not work on my contracted non-working day and am not asked to. I do occasionally have a late meeting, 2-3 times a year. I once had to work loads of overtime for months because of a project where the people managing it failed to take into account or even ask about my role in it. I pretty much burnt out and will never do that again!

Ddakji · 20/09/2025 09:22

No, it’s not normal.

You really need to just say “no”. Leave it too long and that ship will have sailed.

JustForYouMyDear · 20/09/2025 09:22

YABU OP. What is it about saying no that you find so difficult?

YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan · 20/09/2025 09:24

Just say no.

I used to work in a 20 hour a week role. Others were full time. We ended up with a huge backlog of work and they offered double time to come in on a Saturday and help clear it.

I volunteered but I was told I'd only be paid standard rate as I was part time and double time only kicks in when you work over full time hours.

I told them no! I wasn't giving up my Saturday to work alongside people getting double the money for working on a Saturday!

WhatATimeToBeAlive · 20/09/2025 09:30

I work 3 days a week and sometimes offer to come in on a day off to cover something important but it's certainly never expected.

Gizlotsmum · 20/09/2025 09:38

I think you have to be very disciplined to do part time hours when everyone else is full time. You need to set boundaries . If you always say yes they will continue to use you in this way. Say no, make sure they know it is a hassle and pay you for it.

dayslikethese1 · 20/09/2025 09:51

I don't understand why you can't say no; if you're PT time and it's not your contracted hours/days then they can't fire you or do anything if you say no. If they wanted FT, they should have hired for that. Not your problem.

Lucytheloose · 20/09/2025 10:07

You are unreasonable to say yes to something you cannot be obliged to do and do not want to do, and then complain about it.

menopausalmare · 20/09/2025 10:09

If you step in and cover an extra day, you should get it back the next week.

CloverPyramid · 20/09/2025 10:13

You’re not being unreasonable to expect to work your contracted hours, unless it was something they made clear before you took the job.

I work an office job for 3 days (22.5 hours a week) and no one expects me to come in on my non-working days or do any additional hours without accruing TOIL. My job does have strict rules about how many people can be off at a time though, so cover is never needed in that regard.

665theneighborofthebeast · 20/09/2025 10:20

You can tell them you've burt up all the favours you were owed covering childcare to help them out this last 5 months. You simply cant keep conjuring this childcare up from nowhere! So unfortunately you are simply not going to be able to be able to do this flexibility anymore going forward for some considerable time.

That way you demonstrate how helpful you have been. How much its their fault you can't continue to change shifts and that its stopping now through no fault of your own.

Plastictreees · 20/09/2025 10:23

I don’t think that’s normal. I work 22 hours a week for the NHS as there’s no expectation I work more than that.

purplemunkey · 20/09/2025 10:28

Agree with others. You need to say no. You should have done this from the start to set boundaries. It's not too late though, next time you're asked just be very clear that changing days or working extra days is not possible.

I've worked two part time jobs. In the first one, they did ask in the first few weeks if I could change one of my days to help cover. I said no as I only have nursery booked on the days I am contracted to work, so I need to stick to my agreed days. They were fine about it and never asked again. Second part time job never asked me to work any days other that those I was contracted for.

In fact I still work slightly reduced hours now and have never been asked to work outside my contracted schedule.

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