To not know how to treat sudden corkscrew curls

[Celeste123]

DS is 13.
He spent his whole life with blonde, straight, floppy hair.
Since he turned 13 it has dramatically changed in to completely different hair.
It is now dark with tight, coarse corkscrew curls right across his hairline ftom ear to ear, then curly from the crown down the back of his head, but this area has turned regular curly and is not tight corkscrew curls like the ones going from his forehead to his crown.
The curly hair from crown to back of neck is easier to handle.
But the tight corkscrew coarse curls across the front of his head are a nightmare. They grow upwards into the air! Then it gets to his crown, and the curly hair at back of his head grow downwards.
It's a mess and I don't know what to do with it.
He hates the way the corkscrew curls look "puffy" as he says.
I feel for him, as it's happened right at a stage in his life when he suddenly cares about his appearance.
He 100% does not want it shaved off, or cut short against his scalp.
It's more that we need to learn how to manage it.
He keeps grabbing DD's paddle brush (she has poker straight long hair) and brushing his hair down flat in a desperate attempt to flatten in, but that turns it in to a ball of frizz.
I'm struggling to know how to help because I've spent 12 years of his life with him having straight, floppy hair!
To give you an idea of his character, he's completely chilled out, laid back, cool as a cucumber, gentle, funny, kind, sensitive and super smiley and happy. I need to get his hair right to reflect his character.
Are there any tight curl hair experts out there who could advise me??
And does anyone know why someone's hair can totally transform in adolescence?!
And why is it 2 different types of curls - tight corkscrew at the front and curly waves at the back?
I'm finding all our shampoos are turning it in to a ball of fluff.
I bought John Frieda 'straight' shampoo & conditioner thinking it might relax or soften the corkscrew curls a bit, but it hasn't touched them.

Being him to a barbers and ask for their help? A lot of teens are getting perms for the curly look so they’ll definitely be able to make it stylish.

Hormones. It's a thing, my hair went from straight to a ball of frizz (because I didn't know how to look after the curls) at puberty too and I've heard of women who's hair has gone curly at menopause.

He needs to use curl products, and to only ever brush it when it's dripping wet. Use gel on wet hair then leave to dry and scrunch out the crunch - that should make it much more manageable.

Take him to a place that can do a proper curly cut, if you can afford it. They'll show him how to style it in a way that works.

Yes we went to 2 different barbers for help - they both advised grade 1 clippers all over. DS resolutely refused.

He needs a good haircut, from someone who knows how to cut curly hair so that it lays nicely. Then he needs the right products, I use mousse in my curly hair but gel will do either. Apply while his hair is wet and then either rake through with his fingers or use a brush (a Denman is a good choice) and leave to dry. If it leaves a cast, you can scrunch this out once the hair is dry.

NEVER brush curly hair when it's dry. As he's discovered, this will create frizz!

I’d think that a unisex hairdresser would be more helpful style and product wise?

You can buy a couple of travel size curly products to try in boots?

Don’t go to a male barbers for this, they tend to do 3 styles and that’s it. You need to find a hairdresser that specialises in curly/Afro hair. Figure out the topper of hair he has and they will tell you how to treat it. You will probably be better off engraving the curly girl method of hair care to maximise the curls at the back so they better match the corkscrews at the front. But you defo need specialists to get you started.

There's a curly hair UK forum on Reddit which is really useful, you can post a photo of his hair and people will advise, or if you say where you are in the country they can recommend a good hairdresser near you.

Look at curly men’s styles together.

What about keeping the wavy hair short, and keeping the curls on top? That will help it look tidier.

Never brush- detangle while wet. There are loads of wavy hair groups for advice. Generally gentler shampoo with an occasional clarifying wash to remove product.

Sympathy OP. Dd 11 currently has half straight, half city hair! Hers was caused by an episode of hair pulling though, the traumatized hairs grew back curly!

Curly not city

Definitely hormones.

I had white blonde dead straight hair until I fell pregnant.

It turned brown and curly!!!

My dad has curly hair so I guess I was genetically predisposed to it? Although since chemo his hair grew back straight!!!

I agree with going to a Barber - look for one who specialises in curly hair.

Also look for shampoos etc that are specifically for his type of curl. There are some expensive ones on the market but I use Cansu and the Aussie curls leave in conditioner.

Took me a while but I learned to embrace it in the end!

Go to an Afro-Caribbean hairdressers and ask their advice, they deal with all grades of curl, and probably your best option.

Yep it's puberty. My DS developed curly hair at the same age - although his had never been poker straight. He likes it but it's pretty manageable and not corkscrew curls. Where we are curly hair seems to be very in for boys.

Google something like men's curly hairstyles and see if there's anything that comes up that DS likes and go to a proper hairdresser.

You don't need to see a curl specialist really or to build some insane curly hair routine (don't come for me curly girl method people!) - I say this as a life long curly haired person. It is however trial and error and there's unfortunately no one method/approach/product that works for all curly hair. You have to find what works for you.

Hi, I have curly hair and agree that one of the best things to do is find a curly hair / Afro hair specialist who will know how to cut it properly - and they will teach your son how to care for it properly. it’s surprising how many high street hairdressers don’t know! The key is to make sure that you wash the hair first and then use a good conditioner which will make sure it detangles properly, rinse it out and then put gel on it while it is still soaking wet - the wetter the better. You can even apply the gel in the shower / bath. Use any gel, the 50p / £1 ones are fine. Then use one of these combs ( will attach pic) or a Bounce Curl Brush (game changer!) to make sure all tangles are out. Then either let it dry naturally or blow dry it with a diffuser, by putting your head upside down and putting each section of hair actually in the diffuser at a time. Move the diffuser regularly to stop the hair getting too hot.

curly hair can get really dry so you often need to ‘hydrate’ it with a good conditioner about once a week, in addition to the conditioner used when washing it. I either use pure coconut oil (which will change from solid to liquid in the pot depending on room temp) or Camille Rose Algae Renew conditioner (both found in the curly / Afro aisle in Superdrug etc). I wash the conditioners / coconut oil off but some people leave them in - it’s personal preference.VO5 hot oil is also really good, put the vial in the bath to heat it up, then apply to the whole head , leave it for a bit, then rinse.

I hope it goes well and your son embraces it - encourage to experiment with a few different looks because how you dry it - upside down , naturally, diffused will affect the final look. Sometimes it will look different from day to day even if you do the same thing - but just go with the flow, that’s the joy of curly hair! Hope this helps x

My DS has good corkscrew curls. He has to keep them reasonably short for school (but still has quite a halo…). He scrunches them all up when wet - never ever brushes - and uses As I Am Leave-In Conditioner and Miss Jessie's Jelly Soft Curls (this is horribly expensive but lasts forever as you only need a tiny bit). He used to use salt spray but that made everything too crispy apparently.

Forget a barber, you need to take him to a hairdresser/stylist with experience with curly hair. I'm sure they will be able to inform him of lots of great tips and ways to style.

translation; so he’s now got Afro hair you don’t like it coz he had blonde straight hair? 😶
also at this age it’s for him to manage

You know that's not what she was saying. Curls are hard to manage if you're not used to them!

You can get hair chemically straightened, and then dye it blonde again?

My DS has similar hair and goes to what you would consider a womans hair salon, but they have multiple staff that are very good with curly hair.
I'd ask around your friends or acquaintances especially if they have curly hair themselves and see who they go to.
My son uses a jelly wash shampoo and a hydration focused spray ( I think it's a garnier product )on wet hair and then a diffuser to dry.

Definitely hormones. My hair went curly and darker at 13. Menopause made it go straight again.

Happened to my DS too and some of his friends. It's definitely puberty related. Lots of them see it as a sort of badge of honour and embrace it. DS wears it longer at the moment so the curls have more weight IYSWIM and uses Aveda curl products. There is a hairdresser near us that says they specialise in curls but we haven't been. I'd go though for a consultation if he wanted a different style.

Look into curly girl method and products, to learn how to manage his curls properly - it's probably hormonal and might be how his hair is from now on so you need to work with it

Find a better hairdresser, not a barber but a unisex place, preferably one that specialises in curly hair & make a restyle appointment with them, explain the issue in advance. Maybe sit down with your son beforehand and find some pics of ideal hairstyles, fashionable with curls. They may not be able to replicate what he wants but a good stylist can hopefully find a reasonable compromise he's happy with, and recommend products and styling to make the most of his hair and get his confidence up. Bet he will look great.

No.
That's not what I'm saying at all.
I'm adoring his curls.
They really suit him.
But the styling isn't right atm and I'm flailing with what products to use because I feel like tight curls need to be learnt about and have the right products used on them.
Re the comment about previously having blonde hair, I'm highlighting how his hair has turned from straight blonde to curly brown, i.e. it has suddenly changed colour as well as changed structure within the space of a few months.
He's a gorgeous boy and I'm asking for advice because I want to help him learn how to look after his new hair, to style it well and to work with it.
And re your comment about how he should be managing it himself at his age......sure, if he'd had curly hair all his life then yes he would be managing it, but he's just undergone a radical change of hair that needs some knowledge about how to work with it to get it looking it's best, so I'm seeking advice that I can pass on to him.
I feel like you're looking for an opportunity to attack?

That's the last thing we're going to do.
Both of us want to learn how to look after it, style it and embrace it. Not make it something it isn't.