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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To drop my hours to 22.5 even though I’m a single parent?

46 replies

otinata · 01/09/2025 13:29

DS is 6, dad is involved but I’m the primary carer.

I’m a midwife, currently work 30 hours per week. That looks like two 12.5 hour shifts one week, and three the next. I’d like to be full time, but I simply can’t get the child care. I also get UC.

I get a pay increase soon, which mean that if I dropped my hours to 22.5 per week, I would only be £96 worse off. That’s how it works out because of UC. I would only have to do two shifts every week.

If I stay the hours I am at, I am essentially doing two full 12.5 hour shifts a month for the equivalent of £96.

I would feel lazy doing this, but I love the idea of more free time and time with DS.

Once DS is older and can spend a few hours home alone, I will be going full time.

OP posts:
Labradorlover987 · 01/09/2025 14:16

Easyozy · 01/09/2025 14:10

No it's the equivalent of 30 hours at minimum wage. It's the amount you're bringing in, not the actual hours you work.

It's the benefits trap OP. I did the same when mine was that age, I earned a nursing salary and worked 22 hours.

Show quote history

Hi, I’m so confused from what I’ve read it says 18 hours online at minimum wage, is it 30 hours? Asking as I have recently lost my job and have applied for UC!

FuzzyWolf · 01/09/2025 14:31

Doggymummar · 01/09/2025 13:32

Your son will be at school so you won't have more time together will you? I would look at splitting the 30 hours into 5 days say 10-2 that would get you more time together, if that's the aim

Edited

But surely a school day is 6 hours and the midwife shift is 12.5. My maths means that’s a lot more time together.

OneNewLeader · 01/09/2025 14:35

vivainsomnia · 01/09/2025 13:43

I have heard so many time from colleagues and friends that they will be going back FT when they kids are older...but they rarely do because they love and got used to the freedom they benefit from being PT and having g plenty of time fir themselves....until they reach their mid 50s-60s and cry because they can't afford to retire because they haven't contributed enough towards their pension.

You are aware that your pension is proportional to the hours you work? So that going down to 22h, it's almost as if you years of contribution are halved?

In the end, you decide if you prefer to enjoy the freedom of choice now or later, but believe it, you will likely crave going PT or retiring earlier then much more than you do reducing your hours now.

I did that, can’t retire early to a life of travel. I’d do it differently if I had my time again.

NotEnoughKnittingTime · 01/09/2025 14:37

Sleepysunrise · 01/09/2025 13:33

No you cant. UC will expect you to work a minimum of 30 hours a week or you will be expected to attend weekly meetings.
They will not supplement you to work part time.

If she earns over the AET for a single parent she won't need to. She just needs to earn that AET.

Coconutter24 · 01/09/2025 14:38

Doggymummar · 01/09/2025 13:32

Your son will be at school so you won't have more time together will you? I would look at splitting the 30 hours into 5 days say 10-2 that would get you more time together, if that's the aim

Edited

That will make childcare more difficult in the school holidays

Bufftailed · 01/09/2025 14:39

If you can afford it do it. Looking back as a single parent I was flat out throughout. I should have found a way to go a little easier and make up for it later.

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 01/09/2025 14:53

Do it! You won't regret more time spent with your DS.

vivainsomnia · 01/09/2025 14:54

I did that, can’t retire early to a life of travel. I’d do it differently if I had my time again
I'm really sorry you are finding yourself in this situation. The thing is, in our 30s, let alone our 20s, retirement and pension seem so irrelevant. It doesn't concern us at the time.

The reality is that our 40s come very quickly, and with that, for many, a reduction in general physical, mental and psychological energy. Then menopause hit and we have a complete different view of what matters in life. Some will still very driven by their career and happy to work FT for many more years, but for many, it's a time to realise that there is more to life than a 9-5 job, travel and dealing with forever changing new bosses with different managerial styles.

Being able to have financial freedom to go PT then, or to consider restraining, go self-employed or whatever else is a privilege that often is only offered to those who can afford to retire early with a decent pension.

PorcelainBlueCorydalis · 01/09/2025 14:55

otinata · 01/09/2025 13:35

But I usually leave the house at 6:30am and don’t get home until about 8:30pm.

So it’s an extra day of breakfast, school drop off, school pick up and all the time between post school and bedtime together. That’s my thinking, anyway.

They absolutely would not accommodate those shifts. Everyone in a clinical role has to do the long shifts.

Show quote history

thats awful you cant do a half shift - again Women (mainly) being shafted be needing to be part time

KarmenPQZ · 01/09/2025 14:58

100% no judgement from me… I don’t doubt you work bloody hard and if you don’t need the £96 then go for it!

nearlylovemyusername · 01/09/2025 14:58

and we're talking about all those poor and vulnerable who need UC...
and suckers who pay for it...

BernardButlersBra · 01/09/2025 15:07

FrustratedOldLady · 01/09/2025 13:55

I would do it, but then I’m a midwife and already do 😂
I don’t get UC due to our household income, but a third shift a week would get obliterated by tax, NI, pension etc so I don’t bother.
I’ll go back full time when my youngest no longer needs childcare.
I know what the shifts are like and the hassle of arranging childcare when there are 2 of us, so would be a nightmare if I were on my own.
I’m laughing at the suggestion someone made of doing 10-2, if only! There is no flexibility like that… you do the full shifts, or you leave the profession.

The 10-2 suggestion made me chuckle as well. In hospitals it's often hard to get a 9-5 shift, never mind 20-2

As a fellow NHS worker with children then l vote go for it. Financially it seems the better option and less stressful

RimTimTagiDim · 01/09/2025 15:10

If you drop hours, will you get more benefits?

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 01/09/2025 15:10

You need to think longer term. When you retire you will not be comfortably off, particularly so if you go to even less hours and likely you will be working until 67/8.

Pogoda · 01/09/2025 15:12

I thought the benefits are supposed to be for the poor... no wonder the economy is in trouble.

FitatFifty · 01/09/2025 15:19

I think the lack of appropriate childcare is terrible but I can’t see why someone would do it.
I actually have a friend who is a CM and when one of her parents got divorced she started doing overnights for her so she could continue being a midwife. It was only every few weeks though as Dad had him other times etc.

I take it it’s not something you can sort with ex?

MidnightPatrol · 01/09/2025 15:20

Insane that you are incentivised to do this by the tax and benefits system in a profession that is short staffed.

But - I don’t think anyone would blame you for doing so.

nearlylovemyusername · 01/09/2025 15:22

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 01/09/2025 15:10

You need to think longer term. When you retire you will not be comfortably off, particularly so if you go to even less hours and likely you will be working until 67/8.

well, OP will be on benefits then, why to worry?

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 01/09/2025 15:28

I would work less and enjoy your daughter more and pick
up the odd bank shift when dad has her if necessary, or use the extra time on saving money by batch cooking or selling on Vinted etc

Delatron · 01/09/2025 15:32

I am laughing about the 4 hour shifts for a midwife! My labour was 39 hours.. I had to have 2 midwives…

Upstartled · 01/09/2025 15:35

I think anybody who is reliant on government benefits might be best off reducing their exposure to policy changes where they can. Bumpy times ahead.

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