Poor mobility but not registered disabled

[BUMCHEESE]

My DM is 82 and can only walk very limited distances due to an issue with her legs and feet - a few minutes max. She is able to do this unaided eg without zimmer frame.

But from what I've read she wouldn't be classified as disabled or get any special treatment e.g. special parking or access to a wheelchair etc.

It makes doing things with her very difficult as we try to meet half way between our houses - my DC can't sit still for long so while we can meet for a meal it's stressful, and we have to find somewhere with parking close by etc.

AIBU to struggle to think of things to do and places to meet and to think provision for people like this is poor?

(Half way is around Windsor area, in case anyone has any suggestions!)

She can walk more than 50m. She will be slow and in pain but she can probably walk 4 times that.

I live 5 hours away and often go to see her by public transport.

She doesn't want to use a wheelchair either, as far as I can ascertain, so wouldn't want her own.

Thanks , can I apply on her behalf? Do I need her permission?

Thanks. Yes this is exactly it. Struggling to find suitable places to meet and things to do that work for us all.

When we needed a wheelchair for my DM I advertised on our local FB group and Freecycle and a very nice person gave me one. Similarly a Zimmer frame.

Lots of wheelchair users buy their own wheelchair, because NHS wheelchair criteria is incredibly limited. Even if you meet the criteria, the provision is often so basic/ inadequate that people have to pay to improve it or just buy their own anyway. So she can do that if she likes. She can also borrow a tramper or similar on days out, you don't usually have to show anything.
Slow and in pain might count for the blue badge, it's not just about how far you can physically force yourself to walk before you collapse, it's about how far you can walk before you're in too much pain or have to rest.

Apply for attendance allowance - she sounds like she has a few care needs

Why did you mention wheelchairs then if they are not relevant?

just go on her local council website, look up the BB information and see what you have to do. You can usually apply for someone but equally you could do it with her whichever is easiest

Just read your updates - I think it could be a good idea to find somewhere for a day out that offers wheelchairs or mobility scooters to borrow. That way she's not getting one of her own, which might feel like a leap for her mentally, but she still gets to go out and about. I don't know anything about the Windsor area but someone else might have ideas.
Tbh if she refuses to use a mobility aid to enable longer days out, I'd get a bit frustrated. I'm physically disabled myself and I have little patience with older people who insist on not using a wheelchair even for longer days out to the detriment of themselves and their families. People say "oh they're so proud" (not saying this applies to you/ your mum OP!) but that doesn't make sense - there's nothing shameful about using a wheelchair.

Call Age UK's helpline for advice on the Blue Badge form.

Or you can just work your way through the online application. The first page gives you the opportunity to apply for someone else

Apply for or renew a Blue Badge - GOV.UK https://share.google/oxfdLFrd2gzmEUboV

I can't disagree with anything anyone has said, but there's quite a lot of "stabbing in the dark" going on because I am not sure we have the information to give more informed answers. If she is meeting you somewhere, a wheelchair probably isn't the answer - who is pushing it because she won't be able to self-propel. Why can't your kids sit down for that long? How long? And where are these places you meet - how do you both get there? How does she manage at home - is that an issue? Maybe you could break down the questions into a bit more detail so we can give better guidance?

Have a look at attendance allowance.

Being able to stand and move alone isn’t a simple criteria. Especially if she’s in pain and slow and has to stop to rest.

Also a blue badge.

Walker with a seat attached may be a compromise if she doesn’t want to use a wheelchair but absolutely as mentioned above look at places where she can hire a mobility scooter.

But it also sounds like you need to be thinking much more about her future needs if you live so far away and cannot drive to her.

You can apply to the council for a blue badge. There's nothing stopping you renting or buying a wheelchair though OP.

Little mobility scooter then. Probably give her a new lease of life.

she won’t get pip at her age.

can you talk to the Red Cross about a wheelchair? They are usually pretty helpful. And Age U.K. will be able to help with benefits such as attendance allowance?

She's too old to get pip, but she should get a blue badge if her doctor can provide evidence that she can't really walk far. As far as "access to a wheelchair", neither PIP, nor Attendance Allowance (what those too old for pip can get) would give her that. To be provided with a wheelchair on the NHS she would need to go through her GP for assessment. I would be looking at possible wheelchairs to buy privately, or possibly a lightweight scooter? The other thing would be to look at somewhere she could hire one? There might be a local mobility shop which hires them out, or quite a lot of places like National Trust houses or council parks (big ones) etc have scooters for hire. Could this also work with her "not wanting" one, as in she could be encouraged to occasionally use one to keep up with the grandchildren, rather than told she's old and wobbly and needs to rely on a chair!

She sounds like she would qualify for blue badge.
Loads visitor places have mobility scooter to hire which my own parents were sceptical at first but then relaised they could keep up with grandkids on big country parks.

https://support.legoland.co.uk/hc/en-us/articles/360024031592-Can-I-hire-a-mobility-scooter-at-the-resort

https://www.rct.uk/visit/windsor-castle/mobility-access-at-windsor-castle

https://www.windsor.gov.uk/visitor-information/travelling-with-a-disability

https://www.coam.org.uk/accessibility

I just had another thought: your DM could use Passenger Assistance on the trains if she doesn't already. You or she can ring up or use the app. Bigger stations will have station buggies (little milk float type vehicles) and smaller stations may have wheelchairs to transfer people between trains. Again, no need for proof of disability.

Your DM can claim this
Spend the money on anything to make her life easier
It is not means tested

https://www.gov.uk/attendance-allowance

Apply blue badge

https://www.gov.uk/apply-blue-badge

I don’t understand. You meet half way between your houses, but you live 5 hours away and you go on public transport (although sometimes drive)? How does she travel the 5 hours to meet you?

Most people take getting DLA/PIP as ‘proof’ that a person is disabled. But some councils also have a disabled persons card. My council has one, and this enables local areas such as zoos to get in as the disabled and carer tickets if you show this card.

But can she do it reliably and repeatedly? And how slow is she? If she can't do it in a 'reasonable time', which is considered to be twice as long as it would take a healthy person, then she is considered as unable to do it as far as PIP is concerned.