AIBU to think it isn't fair for school to ban skirts and dresses

[helloall987]

My kids attend an all through school they start at 4 in reception and it goes up to 18. There is a primary and a secondary site.

From September they have changed their uniform to trousers and shorts so no school dresses, skirts or pinafores allowed. All children boys and girls to wear black trousers or shorts. No school shoes either just black trainers. The two reasons they cite are modesty and a gender neutral approach so there is no distinction between girls and boys. This is for primary and secondary school pupils. My DD loves wearing pinafores and patent school shoes. I just think think that with this policy the idea of "feminity" is being taken away.

Most parents think it is a great idea but there are a few of us who want to contest it.

It isn’t fair. Give girls the choice to wear trousers by all means but I would’ve hated this as a kid and would hate it now as a uniform policy.

I think everybody overthinks it.

Men and women for the most part have bodies which are very distinctly biologically different. To be frank, I’m always going to look better than my DH in a dress because I have breasts and hips. Dresses are so comfortable around your stomach when having periods/pregnant/sore tummy after having a baby, which of course don’t affect men.

I think some parents nowadays make a massive point dressing their sons in skirts, which I’m not convinced always comes from the child. I think some people won’t be happy until all women never wear dresses and all men wear dresses just to be different and make a massive point.

Plenty of men and women are happy with the status quo, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Oi, I've never had much in the way of breasts OR hips and I look bloody great in a dress. Can we stop it with the stereotyping please?

Yes when girls are little a tunic is much better as they don’t need it to fit round the waist

Nope, I’m as entitled to my opinion as you are to yours. I definitely look better in a dress than a bloke!

Well you can fuck off for calling me a bloke. I'm as womanly as you are, even without the boobs.

I didn’t call you a bloke. If you read my original post, the bloke I was referring to was my husband. I’m sure most women, being honest, would say they look better wearing a dress than their husbands for many reasons 🤷🏻‍♀️

🙄

There have been tribunal and court cases about school uniform and discrimination and there is guidance for schools from the Department of Education and legal articles by barristers explaining the principles established by the courts, which you can view online.

Contrary to what has been asserted on this thread, boys can wear skirts to school if the school uniform policy would otherwise discriminate against them. Anyone remember this 12 year-old boy who borrowed his younger sister's skirt and wore it to school to make a point, although there was nothing in the rules that said he couldn't wear a skirt.

bavmedia.com/archive/pre-2016/10-human-interest/77-boy-wears-skirt-to-school

This says it all. Every prob sorted. End of

How times have changed!

I went to a really out dated/old fashioned school in the 80’s and girls were banned from wearing trousers. We had to wear a knee length skirt, with knee length socks and teachers would walk round in assembly to check we met those requirements.

I got suspended by the head teacher for getting a petition to allow girls to wear trousers. It was the type of school who really stuck with old stereotypes - boys wore trousers, did wood work, metal work and technical drawing. Girls wore skirts, tiny black knickers for PE and did typing, needlework and cooking.

Trousers and shorts do not ‘belong’ to boys, they are unisex clothes.

I think this is the way all school uniform should be. Even better, tracksuit bottoms, shorts, plain polo shirt and the only thing requiring a logo a sport style jacket.
Still uniform, but easy to buy, comfy and practical.

In what way were the boys not limited? Were they allowed a choice between trousers and something else whilst girls weren't?

I think it's a good idea. Skirts are restrictive. In the 1980s, girls campaigned to be allowed to wear trousers. What happened to that?

Nope, too restrictive. I detest tracksuit bottoms. My daughter and I do not own or wear tracksuit bottoms/joggers/hoodies/clothes like that generally with the exception of going for a run. I would remove my DD from a school that did not allow her to wear her school uniform dresses which she massively prefers. She doesn’t even like the black trousers she had in Winter, so now has thicker tights to wear with her pinafores all year round. Her choice.

I travel a lot between Ipswich and Colchester with work and notice a huge difference between the girls walking to and from school in both towns. In Ipswich all the girls wear trousers (I think they must have to) and generally the vibe is very grungy. In Colchester the girls all wear skirts and there are various different styles, some are longer than others, but there’s a lot of itsy bitsy, teeny weeny skirts about. They wear them with knee length socks and I’d say the prevailing vibe is Britney Spears Hit Me Baby One More Time. It’s weird to me that girls growing up in neighbouring towns are clearly having such widely different experiences of school life.

Schools don’t tend to have school dresses after primary so she would have to make a change anyway.
Mine never wore school dresses as they were at a non uniform school where jeans and hoodies were the norm.

"But there’s no “can’t”. They can wear those clothes if they want to. Most don’t want to though, and the reasons for this are largely both homophobic and misogynistic"

You could argue that the reasons are misandrist. There is a presumption these days ( especially from women) that dressing in skirts etc means a man is a sexual predator attempting to gain access to female spaces. You yourself felt it necessary to point out your friend is NOT trans.

Outside of schools no one judges women for wearing dresses jeans trousers etc. outside of specific examples like sarongs on holiday and kilts perhaps both men and women judge men wearing skirts.

I taught in a girls' school for a while and was regularly dismayed by some of the clothing. Dance club and gymnastics were regular extra-curricular activities and they would then leave school still dressed in their dance wear with a teeshirt over it. However, no one seemed to realise (or care, possibly) that their tights became almost transparent in sunlight and left them looking quite naked as they wandered off down the road to the bus stop.

I felt it necessary to point out that he wasn’t trans because otherwise people might have assumed he was and said things like “Oh, that’s different because he’s trans”. He’s not trans. He’s a straight male but he likes to push the envelope a bit and wear dresses and skirts. No-one has ever accused him of wearing them to try to get into female spaces. He looks just like his male friends who don’t wear dresses - except he wears a dress or skirt.

"I felt it necessary to point out that he wasn’t trans because otherwise people might have assumed he was"

Which says a lot doesn't it?

You wouldn't have felt the need to clarify this for a female friend wearing trousers and a shirt....

Nope, she can continue to wear skirts or trousers at our local secondary. I like jeans, but not for school. I love smart attire, adore school uniform (fosters a sense of community, discipline and removes any fuss about who’s wearing expensive/branded clothes). I don’t like the current fashion of casual loungewear, certainly not for work. Others do- we can agree to disagree. That’s life.

No, I wouldn’t have had to clarify that a female friend wearing trousers wasn’t trans. But that’s not because of misandry, it’s because very few men wear dresses and skirts - for the reasons I’ve given above.

I think it's great, it's sexist to force girls to wear skirts and dresses when shorts and pants are so much more practical. Some people just want to cause an argument

I wonder where your daughter got her strong opinions from 🤔

This is such nonsense about uniform doing all those things - DD’s primary managed to have all those things with no uniform. If your school depends on uniform to have those things it’s not a very well-led school.