AIBU to think it isn't fair for school to ban skirts and dresses

[helloall987]

My kids attend an all through school they start at 4 in reception and it goes up to 18. There is a primary and a secondary site.

From September they have changed their uniform to trousers and shorts so no school dresses, skirts or pinafores allowed. All children boys and girls to wear black trousers or shorts. No school shoes either just black trainers. The two reasons they cite are modesty and a gender neutral approach so there is no distinction between girls and boys. This is for primary and secondary school pupils. My DD loves wearing pinafores and patent school shoes. I just think think that with this policy the idea of "feminity" is being taken away.

Most parents think it is a great idea but there are a few of us who want to contest it.

Well stop looking then, how close are you getting to be able to see gussets?!

Honestly girls should be allowed to wear what they like skirt wise whilst adhering to a sensible uniform policy.

To be honest I think it’s quite sad that so many people still view trousers as masculine or boys clothes. Surely we have moved well passed that?

I think its sad a gender neutral uniform can't include dresses and skirts and allow boys to wear them should they wish.

Exactly. British people are ridiculous over uniform.

Not one poster cheering this on has attempted to address that point.

What the girls don't realise is that when they roll their skirts up, it makes them look as if they've got enormous muffin tops. Hardly attractive!

But so many don’t and if anyone dares comment they get accused of perving!

Because they don’t need so many options. It’s a uniform not a fashion parade!

I absolutely would be fine sat in a room of school boys perhaps with their pe shorts on which <gasp> showed some upper thigh.

Stop. Sexualising. SCHOOL KIDS.

All this talk of 'arse cheeks' 'modesty' and the poor adult men not comfy around underage girlsi is actually quite disturbing.

Having tried to buy my DD some shoes recently I think you must be shopping in different places from me.

The options available in store in our local Clarks were really flimsy Mary Jane's with a big gap over the instep (low down the toe with a thin strap over the foot), very pretty with added sparkle etc but none of them looked as good for running about as the boys range, where most of the shoes look like black trainers.

Plus an open Mary Jane is unlikely to be great when it rains.

We'd never put boys in that kind of stuff but it's the norm for girls- effectively we are giving or 4 year old sublimal messaging about how they should behave through their choice of clothing.

I'd love to see more "black trainer" styles marketed at girls rather than the much more dainty and less practical shoes they get put in because looking pretty is prioritised over running fast.

I can assure you that the issue doesn't end with college. You still get perv tutors, but more often you get the ones who wince, shudder, roll their eyes etc. Heaven forbid that they actually comment. At no point will students be told that skin coloured scrunch-butt leggings, arse cheek skirts, trousers worn so low that their backside is hanging out or - worst of all- baggy trackies with elasticated waists that allow constant public ball cupping, are unacceptable. Whose job is it to prepare them for the workforce? 🙄

That is unarguably true.

And weirdly, when I taught at schools in the EU with no uniform, most girls chose... jeans.

Our secondary school did this but with the input of the student Council who did a survey throughout the school. Shirts and ties changed to polo shirts, woollen v neck jumpers changed to sports type sweaters, grey school trousers and black shoes stayed and the pleated skirt were voted out by nearly all the girls. Girls tracksuit bottoms were changed to leggings, school coat changed to a bomber type jacket. Much better uniform all round and the kids are more inclined to wear it all and avoid detention.

Many have addressed this. Pay attention at the back.

"So many options" - bit of an exaggeration- there would be 2 options- trousers or skirts.

My son's school had a very strict uniform policy- grey trousers for boys and a kilt in the school colours for girls. In his last year, which was over 12 years ago they changed it to allow girls to wear trousers. I still pass the school regularly and from what I see and from photos on the school's website and social media there's been no uptake by the girls.

"I think its sad a gender neutral uniform can't include dresses and skirts and allow boys to wear them should they wish"

Many posters are saying this but it feels disingenuous because the proportion of boys who will wear them is vanishingly small. Usually this happens as a token gesture in solidarity with girls in uniform protests.

On the other hand getting rid of skirts removes lots of uniform / behaviour issues and we know staff have to increasingly manage lots of areas outside of academic or behaviour so I can understand why schools take this route.

There's nothing stopping you buying black trainers for a girl, there are plenty of designs that might appeal. Plenty of non flimsy mary Jane type shoes in all of the supermarket ranges plus places like shoezone etc, the girls in my class run as fast as the boys in them. I don't see why there's a prevelant ideology now that we need to ban or restrict things we personally have views on but that are unsubstantiated by any sort of research or fact. Imagine my horror when I see boys wearing sandals in the summer, how are they supposed to play in those?!

No they haven't. There's been a lot of parroting that "trousers are gender neutral"

now maybe you need to revisit biology lessons but arse cheeks and thighs are two different things!

Trousers and shorts are comfortable and practical, most girls seem to wear leggings or jeans anyway for everyday wear, they certainly don't wear kilts or pleated skirts in real life so why would they want to wear them in school? If schools do insist on trousers as a uniform for girls though they need to have elastic/adjustable waists, to be tailored for the female body and have decent pockets. Personally I think a nicely designed tracksuit suits most sizes and shapes, is comfortable and washes well. Wool jumpers, ties, shirts and gabardine skirts/trousers should be sent back to the 50s where they belong imo.

A lot of girls' school trousers are very tight and not modest at all.

Calf length skirts or kilts would solve the problem of rolling them up.

they certainly don't wear kilts or pleated skirts in real life so why would they want to wear them in school?

There has been as far as I can tell no uptake by girls at my son's schools to swap the school kilt for trousers.

Probably already said but it's not 'gender neutral' to default to stereotypes of one sex.

Kids at my daughter's school can wear any variation of the uniform - trousers, leggings, shorts, skirts, dresses, jumpers, cardigans, shirts, polo shirts. I love seeing them all in shorts and trainers in the warmer weather.

Banning skirts is a great idea - too many girls wear them so short, they look ridiculous. Trousers are much more practical.

Why do you reckon that there has been no uptake by the girls? Even though we know that girls and women choose trousers in large numbers when left to their own choices?

The trousers on offer may be uncomfortable.

Or possibly the girls feel pressured to wear skirts.

Something's up with that situation, and it's not about choice.

Nobody is talking about upper thighs. I wore skirts that showed my upper thigh as a teenager and that is not in any way inappropriate. It is inappropriate to show underwear and arse cheeks. Maybe the teenage girls around you don't do this, but they certainly do around here. It's not ok for them to be exposing themselves (which is what they are doing) either for their own safeguarding (as some of them will be doing it against their will due to peer pressure) or to expect other people to be comfortable being exposed to that.