Feeling intense mum guilt due to baby/toddler pouches

[Hellosaidfred]

Obviously I’m not deluded enough to think that pouches compete against actual fruit / veg. But as a mum of a toddler who is extremely picky I’ve found these pouches a life savour for us as I assumed they’d be somewhat healthy.

My child will not touch veg so I always hoped that blending it in smoothies or giving him a few of the Ella’s kitchen or little Freddie’s fruit and veg purée blends during the week as a snack would count as something - but now I’m seeing articles about how bad they are and many comments about how bad these parents are for offering them to their children - I am starting to have mum guilt.

He eats plenty of actual fruit luckily if we slice into porridge or yogurt.

Not really sure what my aibu is, just wondering if there’s any mums out there that used these pouches and feel the same way

Just stop using them now that you know. Don't beat yourself up, you're more informed now so use the information as you need to. Imagine they weren't there, what would you do instead, maybe try that.
I get what people are saying, 'oh it never did mine any harm' etc but really they're not great so don't fool yourself into using them and thinking they're okay when they're really not and there's better options out there.
We can all do better but no point doing worse when we have new information.

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2025/mar/15/ultra-processed-babies-are-toddler-snacks-one-of-the-great-food-scandals-of-our-time

My kids had plenty of those pouches, now they are 12&14 and happily graze on “real” veg and fruits. Please don’t worry and be kind to yourself. You are doing an amazing job x

My husband weaned out LO as he was on leave. Zero guilt when I showed him the article. Even asked why he would feel guilty for making the best choice he could at the time? Must be nice to have that confidence.

I really wish we could all make a collective decision to stop with this mum guilt nonsense. It’s just misogynistic waffle to yet again make women feel like they’re failing when they’re not. I feel guilty about nothing. There’s many problem people in the world let’s focus on the ones who SHOULD feel guilty.

Ask yourself this: would you look down on a friend for feeding her child a pouch? If not don’t look down on yourself.

Ahh yes this is the article I’ve mentioned in my previous post.

It seems to be written by someone who has never fed a baby before. You can’t feed a 6 month old whole piece of fruit. You need to puree it.

And the writer is badly informed about Alpro Growing Up Milk. I’m not sure why they call that one out as a follow-on milk and suggest cows milk is better. Why would anyone offer the Alpro stuff if their child doesn’t have a dairy allergy? It’s way more expensive for one thing. But those of us with children who do have a dairy allergy, we must use an alternative milk from the age of 1 when we can no longer get prevention formula. NHS dietitians recommend the Alpro Growing Up ones because they are fortified and high in calories. You don’t actually want a low calorie option at that age.

I’m most interested by the idea that people are feeding their children these pouches beyond weaning and as even three year olds.

Why - just ease? I wonder what these parents would have been feeding their children before.

It should be blindingly obvious a three year old doesn’t need to eat a puréed shepherds pie or similar…?

I didn't really use these pouches with DC2 (I used the "meal" ones more with DC1), but I have more than a few times put the inside of fish fingers in the blender with a little milk 👀

I think it is just disgusting that they are allowed to market and sell them in be first place. I thought baby food had to meet certain standards.

It's the producers that should feel guilty. Yes, of course you don't have to buy them. But they market them as healthy which is just wrong.

Hopefully something will change.

I wouldn't call that confidence.

I would call that a lack of self reflection.

You can feed a 6 month old whole food. It's the baby led weaning approach.

My 10 month old has never eaten a puree, she's only only ever had whole foods cut up into safe to eat pieces from 6 months old. She just eats what we eat and we take her portion out before we add salt and seasoning for us.

Why?

Because most conscientious adults who have made a poor choice will wonder why didn't I know better? Should I have done more research?

Not just shrug and go oh well I didn't know any better let's move on! With that attitude you just keep making bad choices because you're not learning from past mistakes, like not doing enough research before making an important decision.

Oh goodness OP my nearly teen eats about six foods....After enjoying a varied homemade weaning menu 🤣. I was so worried we went to a dietician to review his awful diet. And turns out he is fine with an added iron gummie. Long game view needed!

But why would he make the same choice now? All I said was he doesn’t feel guilty for the choice he made at the time. You can self reflect and not feel guilty. Seems much healthier that way tbh.

Probably one of my favourite ever responses on Mumsnet! Mine have managed to eat a half eaten sausage in a soft play ball pit and their twin sister's poo 💩

Please go easy on yourselves, pouch users! I work in a secondary school with challenging kids, and some of the parenting out there is horrific. You’re doing great!

My old Doctor was india6 he said there were no bad foods.just everything in moderation. Had seen much poverty there.fruit pouches are a handy snack for most mums.always seems to be mums targeted.not dad's. How does anyone with a toddler and work younger DC manage. Women are doing fine.

My mum thought she was being great making me homemade breaded chicken
she forgot I was allergic to egg, made the chicken, cut it up for me and then I ate it and stopped breathing

Dad “do you remember that time you tried to kill Luna off by being healthy?”

I’m not sure feeling terribly guilty about something in the past done with best intentions (and likely not that serious anyway!) is something to be aspired to. I say this as someone who has often felt really bad mum guilt. If that is what women’s ‘self reflection’ looks like, then I’d love to do without it!

Honestly don’t beat yourself up about it. I read the BBC coverage and was particularly shocked by the fact that the manufacturing process removes so much of the vitamin C, and my DS loved a fruity pouch when he was smaller. But I, perfectly reasonably, assumed that a baby food that said it just contained fruit would contain plenty of nutrients! These pouches are marketed and packaged in a way that is designed to make you think that it’s a healthy option. Self-reflection is all well and good, but it’s not healthy to feel guilt over things that you did in good faith at the time.

My child has eaten some MUCH more unhealthy things in his time. Once, he consumed a large portion of his wooden cot, like a beaver, and I came in in the morning to find him surrounded by shredded pine. He’s also eaten cat biscuits, sequins and, on one memorable occasion, nearly swallowed a deer poop and I had to physically prise it from his protesting, determined jaws. A pouch was the least of my problems 😂

With ds1 I hardly ever gave him baby pouches. Did everything from scratch. God it was so stressful. I remember my entire day being consumed by breastfeeding, home cooking food, feeding baby the food, naps, repeat. I wouldn’t even buy the pouches when we went out, I’d insist on decanting home made puree into ice cube trays then defrosting it etc etc. Absolutely had to do baby led weaning too.

With ds2 I was much more relaxed and he often had pouches and GASP I often spoon fed him too!!!!

And guess which one is the picky eater? Ds1…. Ds2 who was weaned on pouches and breadsticks will try absolutely everything.

You are doing the best you can with what you have and know at the time.

I don't think that many people think that fruit pouches are "healthy" but I don't think that they are unhealthy. If you can afford them then go for it.

We had rusks, petit feilou and frubes... all of which are pretty bad nutritionally.

Or maybe (just maybe) he took a look at his now older, perfectly healthy kids eating absolutely fine, playing , learning and in a loving supportive family and thought "you know what, there's worse things to stress over than if I fed them a few too many pouches years ago" 🙄

People can come on here and say they've screamed and smacked their small child and get pages of "well obviously it wasn't ideal but parenting is SO hard, toddlers are SO awful, sending a hug, they won't even remember it, oh the last thing this person needs is to feel judged, just take a breath and move on"... but apparently we should all sit in guilt ridden "self reflection " about sometimes feeding our kids something that is (whilst definitely less than ideal) basically fruit and veg processed into a pouch... Nah.

If I was at that stage of parenting then Yes the recent headlines would make me stop and think more about what other food we could try to cut out the occasional "alongside" pouches.

But I'm not sitting around feeling bad about something from years ago that has had no impact on my child.

Your doing your best to feed a picky toddler, it's hard, trying to ensure they get everything they need. I've had fussy toddlers and used pouches and premade foods some of the time, and they've all grown into healthy adults and not picky at all. Now I've only got a picky dog to contend with, whose much worse than the kids ever were! 😂