What do you remember from your childhood that you now realise you really misunderstood?

[Carryonrunning]

Was just chatting to a friend about this:

1. Hearing all the boys in class talking about how a girl’s tampon fell out in the classroom. Lived in fear of this for many years before I realised they meant it fell out of her bag, not her body!

2. Opening the door of a sauna with my cousin (which was right in the middle of the spa area, so not private) on holiday in a nice hotel and my uncle inside shouting at us to close the door. I cried for weeks thinking I’d inadvertently seen him naked (although I didn’t actually see anything). Couldn’t look at him for years without feeling sick before I was old enough to realise we were just letting the heat out and annoying the other people in there! No one was naked in mixed sauna in the very public pool area of a nice spa hotel full of people!

When I was little I always read 'Menswear' in department stores as 'Men swear', which was the funniest thing in the world to me aged about 6 or 7.

I used to get very puzzled by those road signs that say no entry 'except for access' - I'd seen the Access card ads on the telly and thought the signs meant you needed an Access card to be allowed to pass the sign.

I also remember getting quite confused at school when we started doing the Egyptians and learning about the Pharaohs; we used to have Radio 4 on a lot at home and I'd heard the shipping forecast many many times, so my brain got a bit scrambled trying to work out what the Faeroes had to do with Egypt.

Similar confusion when I first heard of the Brecon Beacons; thought they were a variant of Belisha beacons.

And epic levels of confusion reigned for a week during primary school when my teacher was reading The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe to us in instalments, and ended one segment on (I thought) 'They say Aslan is on the moon.' I was almost disappointed to discover he was only on the move.

Ah, the never-ending inventiveness of a child's brain. 😄

There's an outlet on Facebook called Sweet Angles that sells, not protractor-shaped sweets as one might imagine, but desserts. Fairly sure it should read Sweet Angels, otherwise it's rather cryptic as business names go!

When I was little there was a reference on TV to someone getting the sack - asked my father what this meant and instead of explaining properly he just said, "Given the boot!". I was left with the idea that someone would get put IN a sack, and then kicked around by someone in boots. And that this might happen to anyone in any workplace, at any time - but I had no idea for what possible reason. Adult life sounded very hazardous and not at all appealing.

At the age of 8/9, friend and I used to roam around fields a mile or so from where we lived. By one if the fields was a stable. One day we passed and one if the horses being groomed. The girl grooming her said 'Queenie, pack it in.' I was puzzled about this for weeks as I thought it was about putting Queenie in a packet.

I was terrified by those ads about AIDS with the icebergs and tombstones. I thought this new disease was just floating about in the air like a cold and little me could get it. Also formed the impression that "condoms" (some sort of medicine / drug presumably) was the way to avoid this but couldn't figure out how I might get my hands on the wonder drug. Adults looked at me with a mixture of confusion, amusement and disgust and told me not to worry, but gave no clue as to why I shouldn't or what any of these words actually meant. Eventually I swiped a leaflet in the doctor's waiting room while my mum wasn't looking and that answered some questions, while raising new ones. "Men who have sex with men" was a new concept and I spent a lot of time wondering how that would work. But by then of course knew better than to ask.

There was a lot of obfuscation back in the day.

"Don't go down that alleyway alone."
"Why, what will happen?"
"Never you mind!"

Or, another random conversation remembered across the years...
"Put something under that paper when you're drawing, you've no idea how much that table cost!"
"Well, what did it cost?"
"Never you mind!"

Kind of reminds me of the story my uncle told about learning about Judaism in school. He couldn't quite understand the frequent reference to rabbits, and the amazing things Jewish rabbits did. Of course, it was the Rabbi, but he always read it as 'rabbit'.

I got very confused about Bergerac working for the Bureau des Etrange. Couldn't understand what exchanging currency had to do with anything.

On a similar note, as a young child I didn't understand why they kept on about hiding the fallen Madonna with the big boobies. It wasn't until I learned about the Nazi looting in the war that that made any sense.

I always was afraid of spiders, still am. When I was little someone told me there are giant spiders in Africa. Of course I didn't think that the larger spiders are giant relative to regular sized spiders, I thought the spiders were as big as the giant in my giant and the beanstalk book or other fictional giants. I am ashamed to say my knowledge of Africa was very limited by charity ads and Band Aid, so I imagined Africa as this place with nothing but deserts and huts where emaciated half dressed people lived in terror of giant spiders who could come crashing through their homes at any minute.

A few years ago DS said on the way out of mass 'I can't believe that guy got to touch a leopard!!'

@Dontlletmedownbruce can you explain?

Leper/leopard. 'That guy' presumably being Jesus.

Ohh! Of course. Thanks.

Exactly! @Pemba At least he was trying to listen!

A friends kid thought they were giving out orange cordial to drink 'This is Miwadi' (this is my body). Catholic mass, not sure if it's the same phrasing in other churches.

Thank you susie, for your origins of words.
🕑

My mums friend, Judith must have had pregnancy cravings for boiled eggs as she constantly ate them and then she had a baby. I put 2 and 2 together and did not eat boiled eggs for years 😂 Even after I knew how babies were made I still didn’t chance it!

I still believe he went shopping!!

It should be a big glass tunnel

No, that's a joke.

on The Lion The Witch and The Wardrobe I remember being told by an adult when I was reading the book as a very young child, that Aslan was Jesus Christ.

I was inordinately confused by this as Aslan was a lion and he dies on a stone slab and was not crucified. It bothered me for a long time because it really lodged in my brain.

It took a few years before I understood that CS Lewis wrote heavily relying on Christian parallels and that Aslan was Christ in an allegorical or suppositional sense.

I still have an image in my head of a giant piece of broccoli striding across when I see 'Heavy Plant ,Crossing's!

I think of Triffids.

I thought that foxes were big, fierce creatures that would eat me up, like the gingerbread man. I was actually quite disappointed when I saw a real fox for the first time, at the age of eight, and saw how small they are!

In Primary school in the '50s we knew that our teacher was Welsh, from Swansea and one day I asked her how long it took her to drive from Swansea to Bolton every day!