Parents of teenagers - do you ever allow sleep overs on a school night?

[hippyhiphip]

Would you ever let your teen have a sleep over on a school night at your home?

Would you let your teen go to a sleepover on a school night?

Yes probably, but there would be different rules for a school night sleepover from a weekend sleepover:

• one pudding each, maybe a hot chocolate no other sweets
• calmer activities after tea
• bed at bedtime not later
• if you want to chat and play in bed then you need to go to bed early and chat until bedtime, then go to sleep.

If it was say a friend who really wanted to stay over and can't on weekends, because they are with their other parent who lives too far away say, they do get to have a sleepover. If it's to look after another child whose parent needs the help, yes they can stay over. Obviously if they would rather have a fun sleepover with less rules, they need to wait until weekend/holiday, but it still facilitates a sleepover of a sort.

Not in a sleepover eat all the sweets, stay up all night sense. If it was for a favour like parents away etc then I would let a friend stay over but it would be normal bedtimes etc.

I wouldn't be keen unless there was a practical reason eg coming back very late from a one off special occasion (for example, a gig or something).

FFS

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/teenagers

DD is 15 and she had a friend to stay for a few nights last week, as the friends parents were away.
I never heard them after 10pm on any night, and they were up and ready for school every day.
It was no bother at all.

I have a 14yo and a 12yo. I wouldn't say never but it's not something I would consider at the moment just for fun. I would if DD's friend's parents asked as a favour, e.g. for a special anniversary trip, but it would be usual school night rules.

Hell no

Discussing this with colleagues at school today- it’s a no from me! Obviously if their friends needed somewhere to stay in an emergency, or to allow their parents to go on holiday I’d do it but it seems commonplace these days. So many kids in late and not in uniform, with sleepovers as the reason.

I have in the past.
last example going to see the new fave boy band finished at 10.30pm. Wouldn't get friend home before midnight. Friend that stayed was no issue. Rules were made clear before hand.

Yes - if done as a favour to a DC's friend's parent who needs childcare. My youngest DS has a good friend whose mum is a single parent and we have had him sleep over a couple of weeknights when his mum has needed to travel mid-week with work, for example.

I have specific mid week sleepover rules though - they need to adhere to usual 'school night' bedtimes, get homework done together, get their bags packed for school next day and have uniform ready etc. I might allow a slightly later lights out time, and maybe a few extra treats, but that's it.

I have done once with DD’s friend when they went to a concert on a Thursday night (with me): the other girl lived a long way away and the drop off post concert would have been more faff than staying.

But they both went straight to bed when they got home.

Sleepovers for convenience are fine if occasional and low key but not a “fun”, stay up late and watch movies sleepover. I need my sleep!

No never. Weekend yes
But they giggle and play music till 3am , thats why weeknights and a no

No!

As a social thing, no.

If there was a good reason like parents away or unable to make it back that night, yes, but definitely normal bedtime etc would apply.

Generally not, unless it was as a favour to the friend's parents if they were away or something. I think the temptation to stay up late chatting would be hard for kids to resist!

No, we never have. School / work morning are chaotic enough without adding in an extra teen

Mine are too little but my niece stays at her friend’s house every Thursday afternoon a very late running sports activity and her parents take both girls to school next day and then they swap the following week. Saves two parents coming out so late, making late dinners etc. It works for then and they just crash.

No because they usually stay up stupidly late on a sleepover. Mine have gone to sleep anywhere from 12am to 5.30am on a sleepover so it would be No from me.

Hard no. Only if child needed overnight care for some reason ie parent in hospital

Thank you - I feel better reading these responses.

I have allowed my 13 year old daughter to stay at her friend's house for a sleepover because the both begged me. This has happened a couple of times and both times, my daughter has been extremely grumpy the next day - more so than usual!

I've said it's a firm no now - no more. She then asked if the friend could sleep at ours instead and they would go to sleep at a normal time. Again my answer was no, not on a school night.

Her friend's parents don't seem to mind at all so I just wondered if it was me that was being unreasonable by not allowing it in my own home.

Like others, I would of course in an emergency situation but this isn't.

Yes of course as long as they go to sleep at a reasonable time and get up with no bother.

Yes we do if we know the parents and find they make sure bedtime is responsible and kids are seen out of the door next morning.
We offer the same set up.

Only for limited reasons of necessity/ convenience such as an early start / late finish to a school trip where we're lift-sharing or to help out with childcare for the friend staying over.

Hard no from me unless it was to help out a friend who had to travel for work or an emergency. A good night's sleep is important for school the next day and they work hard enough as it is without creating an issue beforehand.

For childcare purposes during primary, yes.
Otherwise, I only host/send my daughter during school holidays.