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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have commented on an unleashed dog

60 replies

Isthisthisreallife · 17/11/2024 19:08

Husband and I walking in the park today with our 2 year old, newborn in the pram and our on lead dog who can be quite nervous around other dogs.
A man came towards us with his small breed dog off lead who went straight towards our dog for a sniff - not horrendous but I don’t think dogs should off lead if they wander over to dogs on lead because you never know the other dog’s situation. Then it ran at our two year old daughter jumping up to her face, knocking her over on the second jump causing her to fall in mud and become upset. The man made no attempt to recall the dog or apologise when it knocked her over.
I responded to the incident in a clearly irritated tone (no shouting) ‘your dog should absolutely not be off lead if that’s how it behaves with children’. No response so we all just carried on our separate ways.

Husband then said I was a bit harsh as the dog only jumped up and wasn’t aggressive.
So AIBU for being annoyed enough to say something to this man?

OP posts:
AvidAunt · 18/11/2024 14:31

YNBU. I have two largeish dogs who are well behaved, attend weekly training sessions with a professional dog trainer, etc and I still keep them on leash if we're in public/off our property. One of the banes of our neighborhood is a family with a small, untrained, and somewhat aggressive dog that they let run around in the street, approach people/dogs walking by, etc. They think because their dog is small, he doesn't need to be on a leash but he causes issues with other dogs and has bitten a few of us. Small bites, didn't break the skin, but know that they're the first to send a nasty email if someone else's dogs are barking. I'm out of patience for both these folks and situations like you experienced.

WigglyVonWaggly · 18/11/2024 14:36

No off lead dog should ever approach another dog or person without invitation. This is how dog attacks happen - some idiot’s ‘friendly’ dog invading the space of an on-lead dog or scaring / jumping at people.

I don’t care if the off-lead dog has no bite history. It’s not about them. It’s about the owner not having control should a situation occur due to their dog running up as it pleases.

All of my dogs went to dog training classes and were on long lines until recall was perfect.

Daschund · 18/11/2024 14:47

I have two dogs who I adore. One is a lovely natured small breed we rehomed recently. Whilst our other dog is great off the lead, our new addition thinks everyone is his friend. As a result unless he's in a contained area he can't be let off. He's in no way aggressive but we understand him being 'friendly' can be just as annoying. YANBU and I'm surprised anyone thinks you are.

JawsCushion · 18/11/2024 15:09

BinkyBeaufort · 18/11/2024 11:31

I'd have kicked the bloody thing if it'd knocked my child over, and to hell with upsetting the owner.

Yet it's the owners fault the dog isn't trained sufficiently so why hurt the dog?

BinkyBeaufort · 18/11/2024 15:29

Oh that'd be after I kicked the owner ....

BogRollBOGOF · 18/11/2024 16:21

I recently pointed out to some complete twat that his dog met the legal definition of being out of control after he was very tardy at recalling his dog then failed to put it on a lead after it bounded up to a woman barking and jumping leaving her screaming on a bench.
He considered half-heartedly arguing back but decided that it was easier to humour this interfering little woman by temporarily using the lead until she buggered off out of his way. (Naturally when I saw him again 5-10 mins later the dog was off lead)

I'd say that leaving someone screaming on a bench is very much meeting the legal definition of out of control. He wasn't even embarassed by his dog having that effect on another park user.

I wish there'd been someone else to help out last year when a dog randomly took exception to me, ran up barking and growling, scratching my leg while its gormless human continued her phone call and just groped around one-handed. Being the person being threatened, I went in to freeze and quiet mode.

My children are rather cagey around dogs due to numerous incidents of being approached, sniffed all over, bowled over, sticks taken from their hands and food stolen through their younger years. Growing up, and getting bigger than dogs has helped make their fears more managable, but progress was slow and regularly set back byuntrained "friendly" dogs approaching them. I have been known to respond to "it's ok he's friendly" by growling "my child isn't"

It's no wonder these blithering idiots can't train dogs because they can't even recognise distress in their own species.

The more people point out that their untrained animals are illegally out of control, the better. Hopefully some of them may even have enough brain cells to be capable of learning. They're a bloody nuisence to everyone else in public spaces, human and other animals including well-controlled dogs.

To have commented on an unleashed dog
Loxiro · 18/11/2024 19:28

kitteninabasket · 18/11/2024 14:24

I don't have a garden either so it's important to me to have that space.

FFS you should be able to walk into your building without being jumped at by a dog. What is wrong with people! There used to be one in my block that would piss in the lift.

I've seen so many dog owners reward (often inadvertently) their pets for undesirable behaviour, like jumping up, begging, pawing at you, barking, licking etc. If you laugh and/or fuss over your dog when it jumps up, it will think it's doing something good and won't care whether it's you or some random person in the street. If every time your dog paws at you, you get up and get it food then of course it's going to continue pawing. If every time your dog starts barking you jump up and tell it off then it learns that barking gets attention.

I see it with cats too. Like people who get kittens and use their fingers as toys instead of an actual toy. The cat comes to associate hands with prey, then the owner wonders why they get bitten. This leads to cats ending up in a shelters and labelled 'aggressive', when the poor thing thought it was just playing.

do you live on my block ? 😆 just the following week after the dog jumping on me incidents, there was apparently dog piss in the lift! I didn’t see it myself but an irate resident had written an angry message about it on the notice board.

I assumed it was the same dog but I did some digging and apparently it wasn’t - so there’s more than one irresponsible dog owner in our building! They were identified on cctv and apparently got a letter sent out to them too and it’s not happened since thankfully.

You’re right, those owners definitely encourage behaviour like that. That woman was standing there grinning while her dog ran at me both times. She didn’t say a word to stop her dog at all.

Maray1967 · 18/11/2024 19:30

BarbaraHoward · 17/11/2024 19:12

YANBU. This shit is why my children are terrified of dogs. No dog should be approaching strangers, especially not small children. If anything you under reacted.

Yes, I agree. The bloke would have had an absolute bollocking from me if his dog had knocked my toddler over.

getahhtmapub · 18/11/2024 19:40

All dogs should be under control. Small dog owners are the worst for this as they think they can do no harm and they are rarely properly trained on bullet proof recall.

We have a medium sized dog and she is always under my control. She has been on lead before on the beach and a small dog has approached her at full speed, mine has gone for a polite sniff and the small dog has gone berserk, yapping, whining and barking. The owner screeched at me from meters away accusing my dog of attacking hers.
The same dog does it every time we see them and mine is always leashed but she shouts accusations every single time. Even when I'm getting my dog in the car and she's happily ignoring the yapper.

YANBU.

1989whome · 21/11/2024 11:42

My dog is literally the size of my foot 😂 softest little thing ever but I still won't let him off because of that very reason. He loves kids, and he will definitely get excited when he sees one and jump up for fuss. I am aware not all kids like dogs so you just don't let it happen. You are not being unreasonable. He should of atleast apologized!

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