Feel really conflicted ...

[SoreHeadInBed]

So DS (yr 9) has been given the opportunity to go on an amazing school trip along the lines of volunteering at a school for disadvantaged kids in Kenya. I think it is an incredible opportunity to see a country so different from the UK, and to learn about and help others, and make new friends across then globe. I'm sure DS will get a lot from the experience which will massively open his eyes.

But I have a few conflicting feelings:

1. This trip is v expensive (£1800). DH and I can't really afford it but it seems such a great opportunity we will make it happen and find the money. However, we r obviously lucky to be in a position to b able to do that. I feel really bad for the kids whose parents can not afford this trip. I just don't know if I agree with state secondary schools offering these v expensive trips. It seems v much like the rich will benefit and the poorer kids will be left out. I feel so uncomfortable with it. I wish I could afford to fund another kid so that those that can't afford it dont miss out, but sending DS will already be a big financial stretch and I can't afford to fund another child as well. Are such expensive trips the norm at all state schools? What do u think about it?

1. I feel really weird about a bunch of 13/14yr old privileged uk kids going to 'volunteer' at this school in Kenya. I mean, how much actually useful stuff can a bunch of 13yr olds do to help on a one week holiday? How must the kids in this school feel having a new.bunch of western kids come and look at them and 'volunteer' every week. I mean, if the kids actually will genuinely be doing good and helping this school, then good. I just question how much good they can actually do and the ethics of it all.

Anyway, those r my conflicts.

AIBU to be feeling both happy and grateful for the opportunity for DS, but also deeply uncomfortable with the whole thing?

I think adults doing short volunteerism breaks is more questionable than the spirit of kids going. I also think the white saviour mentality is more of an issue when it's tied up with missionaries which is what spread Christianity and Catholicism to developing countries.

However I feel more inappropriate in a COL crisis. Schools should never put pressure on parents.

We were offered a trip to France at school and the teachers explicitly told us not to badger our parents, let them decide etc.

On the Fundraising front also have to take into account asking own networks for money is really hard... lions club, letters to charitable Trusts, hosting events, own funds.

13-14 is too young for useful volunteering overseas. It’s an amazing opportunity for them, but it’s a holiday. That’s why it’s expensive. If his friends are going and you want him to go, then that’s great, but it is no different from some families having more expensive summer holidays than others or living in more expensive houses. I never went on anything like this at the age, but I did have real jobs working in developing countries in my 20s, at a stage in life when I was young and intrepid, with no financial or caring commitments back home, but when I was old enough to be usefully qualified. I was paid a local wage, learnt to speak local languages and made lifelong friends. Anyone can do that if they choose, so those kids not going still have the opportunity ahead of them. It’s not for everyone though. Many kids just won’t be interested.

I just don't think kids that age are going to be useful in that situation and if people really want to be helpful they'd just send the money instead.

I have heard that any jobs done have to be completely redone after they've gone home.

Whilst it's expensive, my DD wouldn't be going on this trip and it's not for financial reasons. Morally, I don't like the sound of it at all.
French language trips yes
Classic trip to Athens yes
Sports and languages trip to Spain yes
History trip to Italy on a coach that takes 40 hours yes (Good luck teachers 🤣)

My parents sent me on some trips and refused others. They would look at the cost value (as distinct from the cost itself), educational value and the social benefit and weigh up a number of factors.

Sounds a bit 'white saviour' doesn't it? I'd find out more details of what they would actually be doing?

For me it would depend on how the money is actually going to the people in Kenya who need it. I would ask for the breakdown, cost of trip and amount going to the project. If it's very little going to the project I don't agree with it, if it's a lot then I would be ok with it because the Kenyan people will be benefiting.

I also think exposure to another life and people can change the views of young people and they can end up making a big difference in the future because of it. I grew up in South Africa and people there are open to receiving help. So it really does depend on whether it's financial help that's being provided (because clearly child labour skills are not going to be useful) or if it is just tourism, and if it's the latter it's a big no.

It’s only a small part the government advise against travel to. A strip which borders somlia

I wouldn’t allow my child on this trip for your second reason. The cost objection doesn’t hold as much weight for me - either you can afford it or you can’t, both of which are entirely normal in life. Flights and insurance make this trip more than your typical school trip, and I can’t see much bulk discount for more people attending.

It will be a profit making set up and of course your kids and the poor kids in the disadvantaged country are the products. It will be a conveyor belt type affair, and as you point out, that could have a bad effect on the children who are confused and maybe told to act in certain ways to maximise the experience/profit.
Plus you say you can't afford it.
I'd honestly say no to this.

I wouldn’t send my child on this kind of white saviour voluntourism trip. It’s demeaning to the people of Africa and the money would be better spent on a direct donation.

Imagine how far that money would go it is was actually used for education in Kenya. The books it could buy, the teachers it could pay, the road surface improvements so kids can get to school, the sanitation facilities. All so a bunch of school kids from UK can go on a jolly and feel good about themselves.

I would suggest that if he wants to actually help, he fundraises for a specific charity. Then you can use any money you have to go on holiday as a family.

I agree with everything you have said.

I imagine there is no poverty stricken area closer than Kenya that they could possibly have helped with. Instead they have to gawp at poor Kenyan children. Imagine the good that money could do if it was spent right rather than sending a bunch of 13 year old saviours to bloody Kenya 🤦‍♀️

My kids school once did a 3wk trip to Borneo which was over 3k, and involved helping to build a school. This is a state school. Not sure how many went, not mine!

Family friends of ours recently sent their DD on a similar trip, although for a lot longer period of time.

I similarly felt quite uneasy - the trip cost several thousand pounds and this was presented as available to everyone because the children going were supposed to raise the money by fundraising.

In fairness, my friend's DD worked incredibly hard and did lots of different things to fundraise such as selling novelties, events nights and doing odd jobs.

However, there was a lot of pressure on family and friends to support the fundraising efforts but in blunt terms, my family's money paid to send their child on holiday.

All the children were from the same school so all the money came from essentially the same communities. 10 children go for £3K each - that's £30,000 sucked out of the community to go to the private company organising the trip. Not to charity or local good causes - £30K to send some kids on a long, posh holiday.

There's also the impact on education - neither of my children could have fundraised that much and kept up with their studies.

Our children have been offered the opportunity but don't want to do it - thank God!

TLDR: I think it's a scam by companies for over-privileged kids.

Hmmm I’m not sure.
I’d share your concerns about it being a bit white saviour complex, and for the benefit more of the kids from the UK going to visit rather than the kids in the school in Kenya they are visiting. I would’ve thought the school there would be able to do more if they were just given £1800 rather than it paying for flight etc.

And yes I was just about to say - just make sure if you do it you don’t ‘fundraise’ the money from friends and family as that super annoying!

Borneo, that's madness. I've been and it's not particularly poor. They certainly don't need uk school children building schools for them

I did this - except I was 30 and it was for 4 months. We helped to build the foundations to a church and community centre which is now 3 storeys high and still standing 30+ years later. In all this we gained more than we gave - in terms of self-confidence, kindness from the locals and a better understanding of the world. My point is that this is not a bad thing in of itself but it's important to work in partnership with local people and that means choosing to go with an organisation that already has that connection and ethos. Would I have let my DC do that when they were 14 years old? Absolutely not.

@Willowkins but that’s the thing isn’t it - you gained more than you gave.
I think there is more in it for the volunteers than the recipients normally and in that example would it not have been possible/more cost effective to give all the money to the organisation out there and they contract a local builder to do the work. Then they’d probably still have loads left over.
it’s not cost effective to pay to fly over a bunch of people from the Uk.
ok then maybe some continue fundraising when back home and over their life time send a lot of funds but I suspect most don’t.

It's a very good point @User364837 If I'm honest, I wasn't expecting to receive but the experience opened my eyes. We did raise money for the project and took school equipment with us but I get what you're saying about the money. Could the airfare have been used more effectively? I think that really depends on whether someone is there for more than a school trip.

My school does fundraising for a sister school in a developing country, we have never visited them but we have numerous fundraisers throughout the year and they sometimes send updates. No need to go there.

Yeah it feels like poverty porn, your son may benefit from seeing how other people around the world live but it does feel exploitative, I’m not sure how the Kenyans benefit apart from the tour operator making a profit from letting western kids gawp at Kenyan kids.

Most of the overeas school trips were out of our financial reach but I did go on one and I really cherish that memory. Theres no way my family would have had that type of holiday so I don’t really agree with withdrawing them.

Yeah I watched something ages ago about how all these volunteer organisations are de-skilling local populations as well.

An interesting thought experiment is always to reverse it.

African people coming on holiday to do free work building in the West? The response would be half WTF and half, 'coming over here, stealing our jobs".

African teenagers coming to volunteer in UK children's homes? 100% WTF.

I share all your concerns OP and would not support. It would be more helpful to donate the money to a suitable charity.