Tubs of chocolate & toiletries gift sets - show no thought

[notedbiscuits]

Now shops have aisles full of gift sets - mainly toiletries. Plus tubs of chocolates

To me, they make me think they are bought by people who give no thought. Plus some gift sets are more expensive than buying them separately. Take Dove, 2 bottles of shower gel and a body puff thing. Cost in shop £6. Go to a shop and can buy the bottles for £1.50 and body puff thing is 75p-£1 (though doesn't have the Dove tag on it) You are paying £2 for a box! Card Factory do sell gift bags for that size for about 75p. For me also, there are things in gift sets which I don't use such as bubble bath and bath salts - have shower. Last week I had a clear out of the cupboard which has medications, toiletries etc and put some of these into food banks and the posher brands, to those charity shops that do sell (unused) toiletries.

Those tubs of chocolate, which get smaller each year, There's always one chocolate families don't eat. Quality Street- toffee finger and penny - due to fillings, Heroes - Eclairs (they cheapen it by adding Eclairs) again due to fillings.

Remember being behind a woman buying 50 odd tubs of the same chocolate. Said to the cashier "Oh that's my Christmas present shopping done in one shop". Glad I am not related/friends with her. As she would give each member a tub.

If you have no idea what to buy someone, don't buy anything. My family have not sent each other Xmas presents for many years. Why waste time, money and stress?

The fact is, a lot of people feel a social obligation to buy gifts for people they actually don't know that well. It's all very well saying "just don't buy them gifts", but some people will take great offence if you don't. Also some people are just really bad at buying presents. I struggle to even think of something I would want as a gift, let alone anyone else. Or if you've got a list of 15 people to buy gifts for... some years I stumble upon the absolute perfect gift for my nan, or my stepmum, or my niece... but other years I find myself stumbling around the shops exhausted with no inspiration, can't find anything good, so they're getting a gift set.

Voted YABU purely because you think éclairs and toffee pennies/fingers cheapen Heroes and Q Street . They are the best ones in there!

This is me.

Also @JaninaDuszejko "TBH as someone in their 50s with a house full of stuff it's the 'thoughtful' presents that I'm expected to treasure forever that cause me more pain than the standard bottle of booze, toiletries sets, boxes of chocolates type consumables that I can either use or dispose of easily without feeling guilty. Gift giving is a social expectation but it works best if everyone gives low stakes gifts."

• 100% every word of this.

First of all, not many people pay £6 for those sets. They are only £6 now so they can 'reduce' them to £3 closer to Christmas and say they're half price. Sneaky yes, but works out cheaper than buying off the shelf.

I buy some generic gifts prior to Christmas (not quite dove sets... but nice toiletries in the Boots 3 for 2, and the proper tins of choc) ~ as a parent they're a lifesaver for when DS exchanges gifts with friends. We normally do a more thoughtful present for the friend, plus a tin of chocs for the family, or toiletries set for older siblings if they get dragged round to ours with their parents! Yes maybe we don't need to, but it seems the nice thing to do. Whatever we don't use tends to get split up as stocking fillers.

I buy more expensive versions of items people use or eat. For eg I buy my sister biscuits & my mum teabags from Fortnums. DB gets a kilo bag of posh coffee beans from his favourite independent cafe.
My other sister gets soaps & posh shower gel from Harvey Nicks.
The F&M tins come in handy for storage so that's a bonus.

I’m not a fan of body wash/ lotion sets but chocolates are always welcome particularly nice ones.

When I am invited to someone’s home at Christmas I always bring a poinsettia plant in a nice pot. I don’t think you can ever have too many poinsettias

For people I know well I often buy a favourite book - that’s my favourite thing to receive and so few people ever gift me a book !

I don't care about receiving gifts, but definitely prefer something consumable or practical that you can use daily. My Mum always buys me a year's supply of socks which is probably really boring to most people, but I appreciate it as it's one of those things I always forget to buy. Saves the hassle of having to try pick out the less holey ones from my drawers! Hats and scarfs are less practical imo as I rarely get cold enough to use them and you only need so many.

Never had a problem getting rid of excess chocolate, just offer it to guests or take it into work. Shower gels I don't want to use, just get repurposed as hand soap. Bath salts I just decant into an old sock and use to scent a clothes drawer. I always suggest a bottle of wine when DH asks for ideas what his family can buy me, I've discovered a few new ones I like that way and even if I don't enjoy it, I've not spent my own money on it!

I agree a Dove gift box is a bit shit but things like Celebrations are great gifts. Not all gifts need to be super personal and thoughtful. The fact that you're giving some chocolates is thoughtful in itself. At Christmas I give things like Celebrations to neighbours, DC's teachers, the postie and bin men. And I'm always happy if someone gives me a tub of Celebrations.

Also, I LOVE gift giving. I will happily channel hours into finding the perfect gift. But I understand not everyone is so inclined ~ I'm happy to receive a gift set or choc over a gift that misses the mark!

You don't have to hang on to it. Just thank them nicely and pass it on.

Agree with the hobby-related gifts. The gift sets are usually tat.

Sorry to be a scrooge but I work in a very stressful job and have a kid who still believes in Santa and a bunch of nieces and nephews. I really don't have time to be massaging anyone's egos with 'thoughtful' gifts. On the flipside I couldn't care less if I don't receive a single gift for Christmas/birthday either. If you truly appreciate and care for someone you don't really, as a grown ass adult, need to give or receive gifts. If you don't really care for somebody you don't need to be buying them gifts. It's all a bit pointless really

I think it’s an easy generic gift for people you don’t know very well.

I used to get a Burt’s Bees gift set from MIL every year for my birthday. Every year. I don’t even like Burt’s Bees.

One year it fell out of the car in the drive and she RAN IT OVER and I still got it, literally with tread marks from the tyre on it. 😂

I think that may have been the last year as dh thankfully had a word.

I only buy gifts for my daughter. DH and I don’t bother with buying gifts for each other, for birthdays or Christmas. Neither of us are materialistic and if we need something we buy it.

Remember anything unwanted can be donated to the foodbanks, refuges and charities. Please do not bin them.

There should be a swap shop for chocolates. I'll take any toffee pennies and coconuts for my vile strawberry and orange creams. All in date from a non-smoking no pet household 😁

Or just you do you and let everyone else do themselves.

I would love to get socks too @Octopies . There used to be a TV ad for something that was about it being better than boring socks for Christmas and I always thought I would much rather have some nice new socks

Edit; I came on the thread to post a link to Toiletries Amnesty: https://www.toiletriesamnesty.org/

I used to work with a woman whose favourite was the toffee penny. This was years ago and it’s the main thing I remember about her because it was so weird.

Speak for yourself - I would never be upset if someone gives me chocolate in any form!

And absolutely agree about socks, I love a nice warm sock, always appreciated.

To be honest, I’d be happy with shower gel too as it means I haven’t got to buy it.

I am easily pleased clearly 😂

They are for us now.

But when I was a kid we had elderly neighbours who always bought me a little something (generally a selection box) and my parents always bought them tins of sweets or special biscuits that they'd never buy themselves(and not all of them bought for me)

I think that's always appreciated

I often ask for these, and so do other people when I ask them what they want. Toiletries always get used and I love chocolate

Like most people on the thread - I would rather chocolates or a gift set, these can be used or easily donated.

Please don't buy me things for the home - I really don't want the obligation of having a lamp, clock, vase etc out on display. If I need a lamp I will buy them!

YABU
I love a gift set
On that note do you not use wrapping paper either, do you just hand people stuff in a poly bag (or is that 10p too much as you could just pour the individual items into their arms)

Me too!!