44 and training to be a teacher?!

[AmIinsane2023]

Name changed for this, as a bit different to my normal posts.

I'm 44, currently unemployed, and - after health problems and being a SAHM - I want to get my life back in track and start contributing again.

I've been looking at PGCEs (Secondary English) or Primary 7-11.

A few people said I'm insane to be considering it a) because of my age and b) the way things are in schools these days.

AIBU to be considering this?!

Would love to hear people's experiences/opinions, both positive and negative.

@Kugela thank you so much.

Defo not too old. I just went back to uni full time for 3 years to become a social worker and I'm 40. The oldest person in my cohort was 50. Someone once said to me, in three years time, you will still reach that age anyway so you can do that with or without the qualification

Ah well, that's definitive.

There are those of us who have lived the job for years commenting, but what would we know compared to someone who sometimes walks past the carpark of a school...
I worked horrendous hours when I was a senco/class teacher .. 60 minimum...often more at busy times. Plus constant catching up through the hols. And the partner rhe day ypu are actually teaching a class of 30 kids is mentally intense.
Much of my work was done at home so I could drop off/pick up at breakfast/afterschool club.
If you thought my working hours were the time my car spent outside school, you're very mistaken.
This is the other thing OP, you will work yourself half to death and people will still view you like this. You have to be made of Teflon.

"BungleandGeorge
Maybe drive to your local school
and see how many staff cars are there at 8am and 6pm, the answer here is very few if any🤷‍♀️"

What a moronic post.

OP, just be aware there is no 'upper primary route' if you're in England (don't know about rest of UK).
You can specialise in early years or 5-11 but once employed by a school you will be expected to teach any age you are needed to.
The only exception is Early Years/reception which will usually be taught by an early years specialist.

If you have a good support network that is a massive factor for things going well. Most of the teachers with kids I know who did well and still enjoyed the job had lots of grandparent support and a dp with a lot more flex in their job. I was a single parent eithout much back up and that was very hard.

Just to add a balanced view there are many aspects of the job that are wonderful.. kids generally have a lovely energy and in a good school the staff can be like a family in the way they support each other.
You are on such a steep learning curve it can take a couple of years before you feel like you're out of survival mode.

@Scatterbrainbox, for PGCE, if I choose Primary, there are 7-11 or 5-11 PGCEs, but I know I'd have to teach where needed within a school.
Don't know why I referred to it as Upper Primary: I think my brain is fried after a long term 6, with my DC starting a new school.

@Scatterbrainbox yes, most teachers I know who seem settled within their careers have have hands on decent DPs and GPs/extended family.
In the absence of this (been on my own with DC since they were babies), I've 'grown' a great network, but very mindful of how any decisions I make may impact on DC, so I'm thinking that a PGCE in 2024/5 is definitely dependent upon how they are faring (both have SEN).
This week, I'm going to (around work (wfh a few hours here and there) and holiday clubs)), I'm going to hyperfocus on research/speculative applications.

I used to arrive at 7.50. There was no space in the massive carpark if l arrived after that. School started at 9.

I left with a complete break down too. I was so bad, if the word Ofsted came on TV I’d have to leave the room.

I remember being sat in my car in school park just being papralysed with fear on several occasions.

I left with a complete break down too. I was so bad, if the word Ofsted came on TV I’d have to leave the room.
I remember being sat in my car in school park just being paralysed with fear on several occasions.

I hear you, sister. I hope things are better for you now.

My DH has just qualified as a secondary school teacher aged 55. Has a great job lined up for September. He had done a fair amount of volunteering and TA type stuff in the three years previously, plus has always done things (drama, music clubs) with kids so knew he liked it/was good at it. It’s my utter worst nightmare job but he seems really excited!!

you will work yourself half to death and people will still view you like this. You have to be made of Teflon

Yep-this was something that I really didn’t appreciate before I trained. People will despise the fact you get more holidays than them and tell you that you are part time/lucky or simply don’t work very hard. As far as I know, the holidays haven’t changed in many years, and anyone is free to apply to teacher training if they wish to have those holidays. People usually respond to this with a ‘oh, I could never teach/I couldn’t get by on that little money/I hate kids’ which is fine, but obviously choices that they made. They may be working from home/have a car allowance/have annual bonuses or have paid their mortgage off-again, due to choices they made.

You also get countless people complaining that teachers just don’t work very hard, presumably because they went to school themselves and thought that teachers all pitched up as the children walked in and went home when the bell rang. Some DfE recruitment campaigns and Teachers programs don’t help here! I’ve been asked by people why planning takes so long and why you can’t just change the date on the first lot of planning you do and use that for 25 years. If you point out that teaching is actually a job that takes a lot of hours outside of when the children are in the building, you get told you think your job is harder than anyone else’s. I’ve never heard a teacher say that, but it’s been claimed countless times. The conversation then continues with you being told that they are right and teachers are always moaning! I would argue that teachers are often having to defend themselves from claims that they’re part timers/don’t work very hard-that is interpreted as moaning. I

Exactly.
I was a sales manager for a bank before I became a teacher, people can never get their head around it when I tell them I workedh far, far harder as a teacher, with much more pressure/stress and less downtime as a teacher than I ever did in my previous career.

Re: being Teflon, I'm definitely Teflon tough! But, I still have a lot of compassion and kind qualities, so I am hoping I've got the right balance.
But, I won't know until I give it a go.
My origins are that of an incredibly disadvantaged and chaotic/troubled background, so I'm more drawn towards working in areas where there is disproportionate disadvantage, not in some white saviour manner, but just because I can relate to kids/teens that struggle.
I don't know where my path lies, but I'm definitely going to give it a bloody good shot.
I really appreciate everyone's feedback, so thank you.

@AmIinsane2023 I think you will go far. In everything you put your hand to.

To be fair, I have always worked in exactly those kind of schools and love it. Generally the staff are tight knit and people focus on what's important.

It's bloody hard work though.
And it took me a long time to be able to 'switch off' from worrying about the kids at school. Which if I'm painfully truthful was unfair on my own kids at times. And again one of the reasons I left, my own kids have SEND and I wasn't leaving enough emotional bandwidth and heads pace for them.
But then we have a secure home and income etc which us important. So no magic answers one way or the other! X

@BlastedPimples thank you!

@Scatterbrainbox I think my only real worry IS whether it's unfair on my DC to go down the teaching route. They've had 5 years of Mr being pretty much always around.
I think the fact that I can take a steady route/bide my time is advantageous, but there'll always be something I can't be there for, so Mum guilt is setting in for the future.
I have spent the fast 5 years mainly focusing on them and their ND/SEN stuff and now they're settled on the right pathway (in school and out) I feel I can trust they are in good hands when I'm not around and there is time enough to transition them to me being less there for 'everything'.
I do feel a bit selfish, though, for pursuing something that I'm passionate about, as my needs/dreams have been secondary to theirs for so long.
It feels lovely to be able to bring my life back into consideration, but in a world full of choices, I'll always choose them.
I'm waffling now!

I’m in a similar position to you. I volunteered as a TA in EYFS in a primary school for a year and then I’ve spent the land year working as a SEND TA in a secondary. It’s made me realise that, although I could work in either, teens are my favourite, the emotional tax is massive, science has hardly changed but English is a totally different subject to when I was studying and I may prefer pastoral to teaching. Work in both before deciding and good luck.

If your children have SEND requiring a lot of appointments or time off school, just make sure you have reliable provision in place as many schools are totally inflexible about you taking time off/leaving early etc to take them to the hospital. If your DH works flexibly and can do medical appointments/sick days/inset days/parents evening nights/concert nights/snow days and can attend your own children’s sports day/assembly/shows etc, that will make things run much more smoothly.

How would you feel about going down a family friendly employment path in a different field and instead making a contribution to children through voluntary work? Rather than trying to tick both boxes with employment?

Voluntary sector would allow you to focus more narrowly on the areas where you feel you can make the most difference without having to deal with politics or dysfunction pulling you away from that core mission (lots of people get frustrated that "the system" in the ed sector stops them from making the difference they'd hoped).

Just crossed my mind as it might be a more flexible way to build the meaningful future you want without sacrificing time or availability for your own DC.

I taught for 14 years (primary and some secondary) before leaving to work in higher education.

My advice would be to have an exit strategy already in place. You might love the job, but more likely is you'll be desperate to get out within a couple of years.

The workload is insane and it's like no other job. Imagine being on stage for 6 hours a day, no toilet breaks, no time for a proper lunch. Then you've got to fit the rest of you job (most of it) around that daily performance when you're completely knackered. Add in behaviour management and parents to deal with and it's a horror show.

Don't do it.

You have the rest of your life ahead of you. Go for it!

You've got life in your body, a desire to do a thing, go ahead and enjoy being alive and trying things.

There are bursaries for teaching as well. :)

@Shinyandnew1, luckily, referrals for both DC are on, with set dates, as are therapeutic options for the younger of the two, so appointments are few and far between, one regular appt aside.
Their school is fully in the loop and times have been agreed, so for the foreseeable future, all's good on that front.
There is no 'DH', nor darling anyone! 🤷🏼‍♀️ Not even extended family. However, we're in a great community and we sort of look out for one another and our ND children. We are very lucky in that respect.