I’m unhappy in my new house and regret buy it now.

[CountryGirl17]

I recently moved out of a rented house that I lived in for 6 years. It was a small house with lots of compromising features that made it difficult to live in sometimes, especially for entertaining but I was really happy there. When I moved to the area for work, it was that house which anchored me, it’s all know and I have great memories there of my life over the years. My neighbours were great too. I feel really sentimental about it. And, when I moved out it was in better condition than when I first moved in. My landlord was happy!

To get on the property ladder, I exchanged last month and after serving notice on the rental, I’ve now been in the new house for about three weeks. The only compromise was that it is in the next village from the town I left which I liked living in and has a small driveway.

Since moving in I must say I hate it. Firstly, I feel very unsettled and it doesn’t help that I’ve been in a new job too.

The new house is a quaint cottage but the unusual layout that I thought was attractive when I viewed it, is annoying me now and the bathroom is downstairs. The laminate floors are horrible and my TVs don’t fit anywhere. At the moment I’m eating off my lap like a student and not a professional adult, until the dining room is finished. It’s much colder than my last house, the street noice is loud and there are noises inside that I’m unfamiliar with too.

I’ve also discovered that I have rats living in my loft and had pest control have been out twice, which last night they pulled one dead rat out of the loft. There is another one they couldn’t find. It was disgusting. I feel despite my house being clean it feels feral to me now. I truly hate being in the house knowing these pests have been here. This pest issue is also costing me a lot of money.

I’m sat here now in my living room and feeling fed up. I’d love to be sat in my other living room in the old house where I feel safe, secure and to know that my lovely neighbours are there and without the rats.

Has anyone else been through this or can recommend ways to feel happier, as I’d really appreciate it. I hate this feeling of regretting such a big decision to buying this house. Everyone else who’s visited me loves it but me.
Thank you x

Posted too soon.

I felt like this 10 years ago and now I don't want to leave. At first it felt like I was camping out in someone else's house. Every thing I did over the years made it a little bit nicer and more mine. Give it a chance, at least 6 weeks to adjust a bit.

The rats can be dealt with don't worry about them. Try and focus on what you do like about the house for now. Over time it will become your home and I'm sure you will meet make friends in the village, but don't compare with your last place, this is a new chapter in your life.

I can understand the rat thing must be really putting you off settling in properly. I know it would me. I had 5 wasp nests in a flat I lived in once and it ruined it for me then.

I’ve just moved and got other stuff going on in my life and I’m feeling really unsettled, despite liking my new place. I think it takes a while regardless to settle but add in other things and it makes it harder. Hopefully things will change soon

When you move house it takes three months for routines to become automatic.

That means now when you think "I want a cup of tea" you have to think where you go, where's the kitchen and the kettle in the kitchen, the cups, the tea, the fridge and the milk and then the teaspoons and the bin. Thinking all of these things instead of it being automatic is EXHAUSTING. And it's like that for you for everything you do in the new house. Then you have a new job on top of that.

Be kind to yourself. Make a space in the house which is warm and comfortable and that you like and get through the next couple of months before you make any big decisions about what comes next.

Oh my goodness, you’ve hit the nail on the head. I have to get up earlier in the mornings as it takes me longer to get ready for work. Though most of my clothes are still packed away.

Doing everything takes longer and it is exhausting. I wasn’t sure anyone would relate to that. It’s so true.

Getting advice is helpful and although I speak to friends and family, I’m worried of speaking too negatively and not being excited enough about what should be a good thing.

I hated my home when I moved. In a new country. Rural instead of a town.
It was gross. Filthy. Mice. Mould. One year on and I’m not leaving unless it’s in a box.. hold on, it could improve massively in time.

It really is unnerving when you get rodents moving in. We had one in our house a few years ago and it freaked me out. Chewing at night, rat droppings etc, I just couldn’t sleep. Got a brilliant pest control guy in though and within a couple of weeks the rat was dead: hooray !!!
get that sorted and I’m sure you’ll be happy & begin to enjoy your new home x

I’ve been where you are. We bought a terribly run down house because it was all we could afford. Everything was broken, nothing worked, we had mice and it was so dirty when we got the keys. I’m nearly 2 years in now and we’ve done so much work and I now can’t imagine living anywhere else. You have to change things to make it yours. Redecorate a bit, make it feel like home, don’t just wait for it. When I had the mouse problem, I was horrified but mentioned it at work and nearly everyone in my office said they’d had a rat problem at one point and they all live in lovely houses. Once they’ve been taken care of and their route in blocked off, you can forget all about them.

Op I feel exactly the same, I’ve been in my new house since December and changed jobs in February.

I hate here, like you nothing seems to fit Infact I am currently sitting on my bed nearly in tears as I don’t have space in my room to have proper furniture as well as a tv (first world problems)
The designers really didn’t have a clue when they built this place, so much dead space that I didn’t realise was there until I moved in.

I can relate to this too. I've been in my house 10 years now and in the first few weeks had a constant knot in my stomach from feeling so unsettled and homesick.

I found one room I liked (the lounge) and tried to focus on making other rooms bareable.

It got better and I bloody love my home now hope it gets better soon

I was like you when I first moved in. Still am tbh. But couldn’t keep on renting endlessly so had to make a move.

I’m not loving the house - just dealing with a plague of ants who come up through the cellar 🤢 - but I’ve resigned myself to it now.

I’ve focussed on one room and have gotten right and I hide out there. Doing the bathroom next.

How I’m keeping sane is I’ve set aside a bit of cash each week to spend on the house. It varies on what I can afford around paying bills as I’m paid weekly, but every week I buy something to improve the house, even if it’s very small like fresh flowers or a house plant (which I never bought before) and it’s certainly helping.

I'm in my house just over a year now and the first 6-8 months I wanted to go back home to my parents. I hated it, it was empty and cold, it's new so it was clean it just didn't feel like home. I don't really know what changed but it does feel like mine now and I'm much more settled 🤍

I moved 6 months ago, renting (given 2 months notice) and as Truss messed up so there REALLY weren't any choices and it was this house or no house, still renting. I'm the same, moved 3.5 miles away but it's awful, I hate it, mu mental health is rock bottom, had to move DC from their town for the past 6 years, youngest has lost their independence (Yr 8 do just got it) and I spend my time feeling guilty and travelling back to the old town. Working is more difficult as I don't have a desk to wfh, going into the office and school runs (didn't need to do before) means I'm working evenings.
I am miserable and I can't see a way out, can't save for a deposit, can't find another house in my old town I can afford.
I hope you manage to turn your house around, sorry I don't have a better story for you.

I hated both this and my last house for the first few weeks after buying them. I think there is a lot going on: dealing with change, fear you've made a bad investment, feelings of being daunted by the work required to get it to be a home. I grew to love both of them.

You’ve only been there for a few weeks and teething problems will resolve.

Just think…you’re paying your own mortgage, not someone else’s.
The previous house was lovely, perhaps, but not your own and you were not guaranteed to be able to live there forever.
Imagine being given notice by the landlord to move out? That can’t happen now and at least you’re on the property ladder and have some stability.

The rats issue will settle down.
Do you like cats?
I had a problem with mice and they seemed to move out overnight once my 2 cats moved in.

When time comes to retire, your mortgage will be paid off and you can relax a little rather than keep working into old age to pay the rent.

You are in control. Think of the positives because they far out way the negatives.

Absolutely don’t apologise. I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. I hope that in others helping me that you can be helped too.

As a Tory supporter even I am disgusted in Truss. She really made a negative impact for many people. People like you and me have needed to make difficult choices to make good of what we can.

I think we need to just try and focus on the positives and remind ourselves of the good that’s going on in our lives. This thread has certainly helped me tonight.

I didn't want to read and not respond. I moved to my current home 9 years ago. It's a detached 3 bed house with a driveway and a garden. We moved from a very small 2 bedroom flat with no parking and a front door in the back of the property. Completely impractical with kids. However like you when I moved I hated the new house. I would wake each day thinking I was in my old home. I cried so much.

It will take time and you will settle. For me making sure the house smelt like home was important.

I moved last October and only now have i stopped missing my old house and now enjoy living here! Its taken time but the excitement of decorating again and buying new bits to make it homely im so glad i made the move. Theres still alot of work ahead

A big fat yes. I moved last year and regretted it massively. I sobbed many times but after a couple of months & some redecorating aka reclaiming the house as mine, I started to like it. We still have lots of work to do & it’s a money pit but it feels like my home now.

Hang in there!

I sobbed on and off for a week when we moved, I missed my old house so much and really regretted moving, I felt as if I was just living in someone else's house temporarily.
Seven years on , new carpet and some decorating and I love my little house now.
It didn't take 7years for me to settle, I hasten to add, it's a big upheaval and I'm sure once you've got it how you want, you'll feel much better xx

Find the bit of the house which needs least transformation and turn it into a comfortable place for you. We moved into a doer upper, we were cooking with an electric frying pan and a slow cooker, and washing up in the bathroom, but we made a comfortable sitting place in the bedroom where we were cooking (we were sleeping in another bedroom), and everything was fine.

A plumbed in washing machine helped too.

I moved 3 months ago with no chance of moving for the foreseeable future, god I hate it and it makes me so miserable, nothing wrong with the house apart from too small and it's not "home" but I hate it! What I'd give to be back in the village that I left behind.

Its often the case when you buy after renting that the new place isn't quite as good as the rental place. You just have to make it yours.
We all have a favourite room - in my home its my bedroom - so find your happy space and make it your own then spread out from there.
All the best

I felt like this in my first bought house after renting. It just didn't feel like home, everything annoyed me, I didn't like the street noise, the layout of the lounge, the neighbours, it just felt like I was floating around a stranger's house and couldn't ever relax. I think it went on for a good few months before I started to gradually think of it as home and now I couldn't imagine being back in my old rented house, neighbours are fab (I just didn't know them when I moved in!).

The pest problem obviously isn't good but I think a lot of it is normal and it's just moving away from what you're used to and know.

My first house had a downstairs bathroom which was not ideal but I always reminded myself that this meant there were two good size bedrooms (which meant I could let the second bedroom out to a friend), and as I was able bodied and healthy it wasn't really an issue.

Small things make a big difference... when we moved to our current house it was very beige and brown and underlit, most of it hadn't been redecorated since the late 70s, and I remember the room we used as a bedroom had this horrible stingy-sized mustard coloured lightshade that really depressed me somehow... so after a few months I bought a much bigger, more colourful shade and it made such a difference to how I felt about the room. When we repainted all the dark woodwork to a light colour a few years in it totally transformed the whole place.

I think you'll feel loads better when you have a dining table but in the meantime, maybe see about things like light shades and cushions to just make it feel like yours a bit more?