Colleague bringing scales to office - weighing others.

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I work in an office with around 20 other people. A colleague has started bringing in scales so that he and others can weigh themselves in front of others.

Everyone stands in a circle around the scales and watches while they take it in turns to weigh themselves.

So far I have managed to avoid being asked to weigh myself in front of the others, perhaps because I am overweight.

Management don't seem bothered and are even joining in with the weighing.

Not really sure why posting, just wanted to hear what others think.

That's nothing like bringing scales into the office.

I just can’t anymore. Everyone, literally EVERYBODY has something “wrong” in their lives. It’s normal, because we’re humans and we live in a society that values the individual over the collective to an extreme. Is nobody allowed to say anything about anything in case it upsets someone? Why is it so difficult to accept our weaknesses and strengths, our failures and our successes, our good fortune and misfortune, and just live and let live? Obviously this doesn’t extend to maliciously, actively harming, or doing/saying things with a reasonable expectation that they will harm (racism, sexism, all the protected characteristics). But this sort of thing…if it would bother you so much then you have to look out for yourself. Say something to the people involved, talk to HR, talk to your boss, stand up for yourself. You can just be a snowflake and not advocate for yourself if you find things like this upsetting and then put the onus on others to consider every single possible effect of every single action before they speak/act.

You just can't what? Think you forgot the end of your sentence in your haste to call everyone with mental illness 'snowflakes'.

Research suggests that between 1.25 and 3.4 million people in the UK are affected by an eating disorder. Most of those (75 percent) are women.

Do you really think that those millions of girls and women are all 'snowflakes'?

Why do you think that racism, sexism and ageism are harmful (they are), but that ridiculing and dismissing mental illness is fine?

It's really fucking obvious to anyone with half a brain cell that this has massive potential to cause harm, and no legitimate reason to do it. What's your interest in legitimising it?

I guess it depends if it's in work time really. We have scales at work and have used them. We've also weighed someone's boobs....in the name of research. We've brought in guitars, crafts, bananacake, GrandNational Sweep Stake, some new babies, the odd spouse/child.
As long as the works getting done and noones being pressured to join in that's fine. Many places don't have an official teabreak as such, you'll just stop for a bit, have a drink and/or a natter.
Is it the scales you feel uncomfortable with, or because it's not 'work related'?

I don't think you can ban a topic because it might be triggering. Would that mean you couldn't have general discussions around food? Or maybe babies would be off the agenda in case someone had a miscarriage.
I think anything could be irritating if it's distracting you in the middle of the office but unless you have a blanket ban ie work quietly with no talking other than work related, then I think you should expect and tolerate a certain amount of craic that you have no interest in.

I'm picturing the scene, something like The Office with Gareth starting things off. It's not really for a reason, it's just lighthearted amusement or bantz. I can imagine people whooping coz someone's put on 2lb and blaming the kebab they had at the weekend, then someone will say they haven't had their post lunch poo....they'll be one person who takes it too seriously and takes his shoes off and one of the lads will stand on the back when Sophies on and declaring 20stone.
It would amuse me for a bit. Not the scales but the interaction....much much more than someone asking me if I'm going anywhere nice for my holidays or letting me know Kieshas had the baby. Horses for courses I guess.

You’re not helping yourself. I have not, and wouldn’t ever call “everyone with a mental illness” a snowflake. You’re angry, and lashing out. I could, if I were sensitive about it, take umbrage at this comment given my family history with BPD and schizophrenia.

3.4m people tops is approx 5% of the UK’s population. Not all eating disorders are the same, as well you know. And not all of those 3.4m people are the same (obviously). Of all the call centers in the country - I think this is the OP’s workplace? - let’s assume 5% have or had an eating disorder. Are they all like you? Will they all be equally affected by it? Will some be further along the process or developing, being in the grip of, recovering from, having put behind them their eating disorders? How are other people meant to accommodate all of these individuals?

You are totally out of order sublimating eating disorders into “mental illness”. Not every eating disorder is a mental illness, not every mental illness is an eating disorder.

I have no interest in legitimising harm, you are wrong to say I have. I suggested advocating for yourself, standing up for yourself. I didn’t say “suck it up buttercup, this is the correct way to be”. You are putting the onus fully on other people. These things are a dialogue, in reality (ie not on MN!). In real life, someone says something upsetting or rude, and the affected person says something about it, the first person apologises (because most people are decent) and everyone moves on. In the real world, you don’t sit around seething, while people who you haven’t enlightened, continue to say upsetting things they can’t reasonably know are upsetting you.

It sounds like so many people here work in boring environments. It’s nice to enjoy being at work with people you enjoy spending time with. I’m sure this is for people who want to lose weight with the support of their colleagues. Doing it together will make it more successful. If people want to join in they can, if people don’t want to I’m sure that’s fine. Just let people enjoy themselves (this isn’t aimed at the OP, just the people who expect everything to be serious in every office).

I'm sorry, that's just a weird thing to do in an office!! And to all join in to look at each other's weight? Have they no work to be getting on with?

My team manager would have a complete attacks of the vapours!!!

That is a description of a toxic, even bullying office environment -or the potential to be. Definitely not nice for the majority of people. If you want to be in a slimming club, then it needs to be out of the office and of course out of hours. Setting up a running club or lunchtime walk club would be a better idea.

This is exactly why I'd see this as a problem. So much potential for low level bullying.

I think you should alert HR to the issue so that you don't have to be the one to tell them that you don't think it's ok to be doing this in the office. If everyone was ok with it that's one thing, but it's sufficiently outside what you'd normally expect to have at a workplace that if anyone doesn't like it it should stop. You don't like it. You shouldn't have to single yourself to anyone as someone who doesn't like it in order to avoid having to put up with it at work.

this is your idea of fun? people standing in a circle watching each other weigh themselves. I mean that's fine. But to other people it sounds boring as hell.

Swings and roundabouts.

It's a bit of a jump to say they're valuing weight loss. If it's lads they might be valuing muscle gain...or maybe someone's shredding ready for a WhiteCollar fight end of month..

Each to their own, although ours have done similar but in small groups

It might be triggering for some but why is that anyone else's problem? I'm not going to live my life around other people's sensitivities

I have triggers for anxiety but wouldn't dream of asking people to change their behaviour just to suit me.

high five 😂

I’m sorry but how is it toxic to be in an enjoyable workplace where people are supportive of each other? People don’t have to take part. It’s only toxic and bullying, if the people are being forceful or are rude. Which is unlikely or OP would have mentioned that

I feel like people just love to moan about things, and can’t handle people being happy sometimes

And that’s fine if it’s boring to you, just don’t take part and get on with your day. Lots of things ar e boring to me, I don’t complain or moan about it though, I just let people enjoy themselves

and yet here you are moaning

That’s such a weird thing to do in an office, not conducive to a professional environment at all.

Is this for real?

how weird if so and don’t they have anything better to do like get on with their work? So odd.

No not moaning at all. Just suggesting you lighten up. Life is too short to not let others enjoy life

Of course eating disorders are mental illnesses. What on earth do you mean?

Why do you think the onus is on the person who's negatively affected to speak out, forcing them to confront an entire group, rather than the onus being on the group, or the manager, to not do things in the workplace, in working hours, that have massive potential to cause distress?

I don't have any problem standing up for myself online or in real life. Not everyone feels the same, particularly when outnumbered, which is why it's not ok to do this sort of shit in the workplace- which, by definition, people can't leave at will.

You say 5 per cent as if that's a tiny number. Assuming more than 20 employees in a workplace, that implies at least one has an eating disorder- more if it's disproportionately female.

Why would you defend this? Why would you want to upset people, knowing that in all likelihood it will put them in a horrible position?

Shit like this doesn't belong in a working environment

If someone asked me to get on scales I would just laugh hysterically and walk away shaking my head..