To find that my ‘D’P has hacked away at two shrubs in our garden and it looks awful, beyond awful.
I do the majority of gardening and five years ago our new build garden was a completely blank canvas apart from a lawn and patio area. Since then I have planted trees, shrubs, plants and created a garden space that I am proud of, and a space we are complimented on. My phone camera roll is full of photos of the garden evolving over the past five years.
Today I receive a text to say that ‘D’P has hoovered, done some ironing and done some pruning, followed by a 😁 emoji.
He’s actually hacked away at two shrubs, which would have provided berries and shelter for the birds in winter, and reduced their size by a least 50%. They used to cover the plain wall of our carport, provided screening and allowed some privacy from our neighbours (and vice versa). No discussion took place, nothing.
AIBU to be so angry, to feel as upset as I do? Of course, they’ll hopefully grow back next spring. But they didn’t need to be reduced in size, I maintained them well and they looked really good! Now they are ugly, shapeless, and I simply don’t understand what possessed him!
AIBU? Any advice?
AIBU?
I have come home from work…
Itsokay2020 · 07/09/2022 17:34
Am I being unreasonable?
1768 votes. Final results.
POLLTeddletime · 07/09/2022 17:50
I agree that your husband has made a good job of the pruning. I enjoy gardening and I am impressed by his work. They will grow much better next year because of his efforts
advice online for pruning now -
Begin by finding long, newly grown shoots which have been extending since late spring. You can shorten those, now. Follow each long stem back towards its base.
When you've found where the long stem joins the plant, count up to six or seven leaves along that stem. Sever the stem just above the sixth or seventh. You will be shortening that stump a little more, next January.
But if you prefer to do your pruning in one go, cut the stump a little shorter, leaving four or five leaves now.
Flower clusters will develop on each stump for next spring's show.
Itsokay2020 · 07/09/2022 17:47
Yes, agreed, it looks neater, but that wasn’t the look that I was trying to achieve! Against harsh lines of the building/fence, the shrubs softened the look of that corner and I don’t feel
it was necessary to cut them back, so much, right now.
But I think the main issue is the lack of discussion, literally nothing. We clearly need to work on communication 😔
Itsokay2020 · 07/09/2022 17:43
@TheJudgment I’m glad you think he’s done a good job! I’ll never agree that the wall or fence is more attractive than the shrubs when they’re flourishing 😔
mackthepony · 07/09/2022 18:13
I'm with you on the wild garden look, op. And it is better for birds, insects etc
His version just looks blah
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