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AIBU?

in being peeed off that dsil said

47 replies

belcantavinissima · 07/01/2008 17:03

she didnt like the top i bought for her ds for his b'day. i just asked her if it had fited ok and she made a face and i said oh no didnt it fit then? and she siad oh no its not that. i didnt like it sorry i've given it away.
now i have been brought up to be grateful for what you receive and to say thank you and smile and say how lovely so as not to hurt the givers feelings. and she has hurt my feelings actually and i feel really pissed off. more of a rant really rather than an AIBU as i am pretty sure i'm not BU at all actually!

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VictorianSqualor · 07/01/2008 17:30

Oh and if asked, I would say that the DC's already had them so we sold them on ebay and bought something else because we didnt have the receipt, but that's because DD has a big gob and would tell anyway!

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lucyellensmum · 07/01/2008 17:31

just money next year?? She would be lucky if she got anything if it were me, im a sort of one strike and you're out, type of girl ;)

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bossykate · 07/01/2008 17:33

it wasn't the "they call me knucklehead" one was it?

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SoupDragon · 07/01/2008 17:36

Of course, if you pretend you like something that you really hate, you run the risk of ending up with similar things in the future...

Could have been phrased better mind you.

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MaryAnnSingleton · 07/01/2008 17:38

she was rude and ungrateful, in my opinion

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mumzyof2 · 07/01/2008 17:46

Oh come on....we want a pic!!!

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VictorianSqualor · 07/01/2008 17:48

TBF, I've just looked at all the small paul tops and there were only tow I could see anyone could possibly find offensive, the others were loud, but I wouldn't say Lairy.

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LoveAngel · 07/01/2008 17:56

Cheeky cow. I am constantly flabbergasted at how rude people are over gifts. Gifts. You don't have to buy them, you do so out of the goodness of your heart. If people don't like them, they should handle the situation sensitively - or lie.

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Hecate · 07/01/2008 18:00

You're too scared to give us a pic in case we all change our minds and agree with her, aren't you?

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mehdismummy · 07/01/2008 18:15

hi saw your thread mumzy how are you is everything ok on dp front. My sil is constantly rude dont listen to her anymore!

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miobombino · 07/01/2008 19:03

V rude imo. Can any of us honestly say they have liked all the clothes bought for their dcs by other people /? No. Thought not.

Just accept the thing with good grace

Or, if you must, say something like "It's lovely, just his size, but XXX is a bit of a pain right now and won't wear blue/green/slogan tops, would you mind very much if I took it back and changed it for a red/brown/whatever one".

I've never said anything like that, but would in the face of soething I privately thought vile beyond belief, not simply a garment not to my taste.

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belcantavinissima · 07/01/2008 19:14

lol! it wasnt offensive at all!
it was light yellow with little lions all over it- tight fit, kind of cool seventies! its for a 3 yr old!

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smoggie · 07/01/2008 19:46

YANBU at all! What an insensitive thing to say to somebody who has taken the trouble to buy a present. People constantly amaze me with their lack of tact and selfishness. She must be a lovely individual. I agree with others, take the moral highground, smother them with kindness.....................................then 'f' her into the ground as soon as she's gone

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hatrick · 07/01/2008 20:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

OverMyDeadBody · 07/01/2008 21:03

YANBU, I think she was quite rude.

The top sounds like one a 3 yr old would like (unless of course he has a deep seated phobia of lions ), if my DS got given clothes I didn't like, I wouldn't get rid of them unless he didn't like them either, sounds like your sil gave the top away coz she didn't like it. How unfair is that?!?!?!

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LazyLinePainterJane · 07/01/2008 22:12

cheeky mare!

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bracingair · 07/01/2008 22:26

but a thread could easily have been started "my dsil annoys me by spends monies on my dc's without consulting if it would be appropiate".

I dont enjoy my mil buying the kids toys which are inappropaite. I would far rather she asked have you got anything in mind. The annoying thing with her is that she follows up if they are actualluy using it, when id much rather free up the space.

your dsil may see you as annoying but she was actually rude, so you definately have the moral high ground

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Elasticwoman · 07/01/2008 22:31

If you'd asked her whether she liked it, she could be forgiven for answering honestly. But you only asked if it fit, and she could have answered that without hurting your feelings. What did you say when she said she didn't like it? "Oh, so you won't be sending me a thank you letter then?"

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mumzyof2 · 07/01/2008 23:14

Mehdismummy - sorry, just read your post. Im ok thanks. dp has got to go to court on 16th, because of everything. 16th is my birthday, this is not going to be my year. Thanks for chatting the other night though.
hijack over.

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Wuxiapian · 08/01/2008 00:21

If someone's made the effort to buy a gift, you should accept it gracefully, whether it's to your taste or not.

I bought my "best friend" a jumper for christmas a few years back. Put a lot of care and thought into it only to be told, "I don't like it, I'm not wearing that, after all these years... I wouldn't be seen dead in it".

I seriously thought he was winding me up because I couldn't believe that someone could be such an ungrateful asshole.

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toomanystuffedbears · 08/01/2008 02:30

Gift cards were invented for people like this.

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Wuxiapian · 08/01/2008 16:58

I personally wouldn't (and didn't) bother again!

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