School has banned Kickers shoes! I have bought them for DS. AIBU to to let him wear them and start a fight with them if they try to sanction him?

[CarefulDriver]

DS is starting secondary school next week. The school uniform regulations on the school website dictate that they wear black shoes (no trainer like shoes). Fine.

I bought him a pair of Kickers as I wanted comfy shoes which will last him most of the year. I know from previous experience with DS1 and 2 that the ‘businessman’ style shoes don’t last if they’re playing footie at break! Most of the DCs at their school wore Kickers and so did they once I caught on.

Chatting to friend who’s DC is also going to the same school yesterday and apparently the school has banned shoes with visible branding on which Kickers have. This is not on the main school uniform webpage which is what I checked to get his uniform but on a sub page for new Yr7s which I had read but only skimmed over the uniform bit as assumed it was the same as the main page.

I spent £68 on shoes, which IMO are common school shoes, he may not now be able to wear. He won’t be wearing out of school either obviously! I got them online direct from Kickers with a 14 day return policy which has runout now.

WIBU to just send him in on his first day in them?

Madness, OP. YANBU.,

I know teachers LOVE having to spend time enforcing these petty, pointless, silly wee rules.

As for these shoes somehow being desirable - they are maybe a bit more expensive than some other shoes but according to Captain Samuel Vimes’ ‘Boots’ theory of socioeconomic unfairness they are a far more practical choice.

I am working up to contacting my DS's school on the 'white shirt' rule. A mid-tone polo shirt requires less washing, no ironing, lasts longer. We can't have schools banging on about climate change and terrifying pupils about the consequences while concurrently insisting on carbon-heavy lifestyle choices like crispy white shirts.

@TidyOmlette

Send him in wearing them and have a screenshot of the page handy and saved so if anything is said you can refer back to it and send it on incase they change it

What the page that says black shoes when she he is wearing a pair of black red and green shoes?

Parents are also blackmailed into following petty rules which have no effect on their children’s education, a service they pay for through their taxes, and which in a lot of cases is very poor.

What compromising information do schools have on you, OP, that they can blackmail you?

Kickers were specifically banned in my DCs secondary schools. One a state grammar, one a state comprehensive. Both DCs now adults….

All the stuff about level playing fields sounds plausible but just doesn’t work in real life. Kids can tell when somebody has less money regardless of uniform and bullies always find something to bully about.

Agreed, but they can at least reduce the pressure on poor families by banning ludicrously expensive brands. When I was at school, the poorest kids often had all the name brands, their parents would get it through catalogues and be skint all year paying it back. The poorest families are the ones who feel the most pressure not to show how poor they are.

Shocked at the amount of people who think these rules are acceptable. Why is there no campaign about stupid school uniform rules. I agree if they're so specific they should be provided. Especially those schools who demand ridiculously expensive items.

Kickers were banned at my school even and I’m in my mid-30s so I guess I’ve always seen them as a sort of controversial school shoe, so it doesn’t surprise me that they are still banned and it’s certainly not a new thing.

@dunkaccino

Just cut the tag off with a stanley knife.

This.

@ICantFindTheBuffet

Shocked at the amount of people who think these rules are acceptable. Why is there no campaign about stupid school uniform rules. I agree if they're so specific they should be provided. Especially those schools who demand ridiculously expensive items.

I would be quite happy for parents to start such a campaign.

But do you realise that there will always be a dress code for pupils to follow?

I think teachers just want to get on with teaching, and not have to spend time on silly disciplinary issues. The most effective way to do this is to have very clear rules and expectations and enforce them consistently.

I sympathise with the OP having spent £68 they won’t get back but I wouldn’t be challenging the school on this, as the shoes aren’t plain black.

That's a lovely shoe.. would his trousers not perhaps cover the logo ?

Schools not only want kids to look the same, , but think the same, act the same and eat the same. Might as well stamp them all with the same barcode and be done with it. So much for individuality.
They need to keep up with the times and adopt a more casual and comfor table uniform. They used to nsist my son wore his shirt, v neck jumper as well as heavy blazer in a red hot crowded classroom. What's the sense in that?
It is a huge relief both of mine are out of the school system and a lot happier for it.

Op, if you do “start a fight” over this can you please keep the thread updated so we can see how it pans out? You will get bonus points if you do a local rag sad face story over it. 👍

@CarefulDriver

What about phones? There’s more brand snobbery about that at secondary school these days. I know my older DCs had the shit ripped out of them for not having iPhones.

Will they start dictating that the only phones allowed at school are cheap Alcatel ones?

Just follow the rules set by the school YOU have chosen to send your kid to.

But do you realise that there will always be a dress code for pupils to follow?

That’s fine.

When I was at school it was:

Black jumper or cardigan
Black skirt or trousers
White shirt or polo shirt
Black shoes

Zero issues.

If kids are bullied for not having the latest stuff THAT’S what needs dealing with - not isolation or detention for fucking labels on shoes.

which I had read but only skimmed over the uniform bit as assumed it was the same as the main page

🤔

This thread has turned into poor versus rich families.
The issue is about the school not being clear enough in shoes policy. They didn’t spell out in black and white that kickers was not allowed to be worn at school putting parents and the children in a very difficult situation.
Re orthotics, for these doubtful people on her about orthotics, let me tell you that from experience that it’s super hard to find shoes that fit custom made orthotics because it not. I never wore pretty shoes and I still suffer finding good shoes that fit my orthotics. I’m so limited in choice and styles. So I believe the OP when she said how difficult it is to find shoes to fit her son’s fit and the orthoses he’s got. Be kind to her.

You didn’t read the rules. Send the kickers back and buy a school approved pair.

Ds has custom made orthotics. The best fit shoes we have have found are some boots from Clark’s. My nephew also has orthotics and and wears the same boots as they fit him too

@Totallydefeated

It seems that the main criterion for schools when deciding what they will deign to allow pupils to wear is whatever they really don’t want to wear - I.e. let’s see what pupils want to wear and make sure we say they can’t wear that.

Kickers seem like eminently sensible school shoes to me - robust, weather-proof and good for feet. Far better, more practical and hard-wearing than flat, thin business-man shoes that are uncomfortable and bad for feet. Why would you want to force growing feet into shoes that are worse for them?

When flares were in fashion, schools complained about them and banned them - too wide - then when skinnies were in they didn’t like those either - no longer too wide but too skinny. No mini skirts, but no long skirts either. Basically, they seem to want all the girls dressed like Margaret Rutherford playing Miss Marple and all the boys looking like a bank manger from the 1950s. Why????

All the stuff about level playing fields sounds plausible but just doesn’t work in real life. Kids can tell when somebody has less money regardless of uniform and bullies always find something to bully about.

Similarly, the tripe about going to another school if you don’t like the uniform policy is further bilge that sounds plausible but is completely impractical. Try finding a school with a sensible dress policy and see how far you get, they’ve all fallen hook, line and sinker for the uniform ideology.

It all just seems like a massive ego trip on the part of HTs, rather than anything that might actually benefit pupils. Or perhaps some way of forcing pupils to conform, so they grow up to be good little worker bees, rather than anybody who might think for themselves or question the status quo.

I just wish we could grow up in the country, take this silly focus off appearance and focus on what should be the real business of school life - learning.

Yet if you let kids chose what to wear they all wear much the same thing because they are little conformists. Be it boho charity shop style or Canada Goose knock offs, Kickers or Doc Martens or whatever else is doing the rounds.

At least school rules gives them something to rebel against.

If it's not on the website/uniform information just say you had no idea about the 'no kickers rule' and that you won't be paying for another pair of shoes as they are smart black shoes that the policy states.

This kind of stupidity will continue until the majority of parents band together and start to lash back and refuse to be blackmailed.

For anyone that is looking for decent school shoes - look at 'Treads' indestructible shoes. Typically fashion conscious DCs have worn these throughout high school and they truly are indestructible!!

I don’t have DCs at school but when I was at secondary Kickers were common place - we never thought they were a ‘cool’ brand like Nike or Jane Norman (at the time!!)- they were seen as just boring but comfy long lasting school shoes? I’m a bit surprised to get the impression from this thread they are ‘cool’ and expensive! If they are £68 as stated previously in this thread, is that really expensive for a pair of shoes that will be worn every single day of the school year for a whole year? I think that’s good value.. or at least fairly normal for the wear & tear? Let’s take work shoes got example- I think most people spend £25-100 on various pairs of shoes; and wear these across different days at work across a year.. I expect the average is more than a £68 spend? I understand not everyone can afford that but didn’t realise they are seen as a status symbol with a price tag of £68.. xo

"Just follow the rules set by the school YOU have chosen to send your kid to."

We don't all get to choose. We pick three schools and are allocated a place. All three schools could have the exact same nonsensical uniform rules. Such as no boots, but no lockers, yet we want children to walk to school. Some people only really have one choice of school, depending on were they live.

@AlfonsoTheMango, parents are blackmailed by the use of isolation (emotionally damaging) and expulsion. There have been parents who've had to get the press involved so their DDs can wear trousers, or their black child wear their hair a certain way. So let's not pretend that some schools don't have control freaks on the board of governors, or as Heads.

For those saying that there's help for poorer families, the only help Is second hand uniforms, collected by local community groups, in some areas.