She seems older for her age

[Justsawagecko]

My toddler Dd. She’s almost 3 but has crazy vocabulary..using words like ‘Absolutely’ ‘Broadcasting’ ‘Besides’ etc. She hears something and it just seems to stick in her mind, she knows what it means too. Ever since she was around 1.5, her language just took off and we’ve had normal conversations ever since. She crawled & walked fairly late, but just seems so attuned to things and like an older child in a toddlers body in many ways. It worries me for the future, is this normal?

[Justsawagecko]

@Justcurious93 Thank you 😊

[Justsawagecko]

@GrandDuchessRomanov I’m sorry to hear that.

[Justsawagecko]

@DroopyClematis Which part sounds not right?

[thedarkling]

@azimuth299

This is my favourite thing that I have ever read on Mumsnet, and I've been here for years!

DS2’s GCSE English teacher told me she’d done an advanced A level course to make sure she was up to the job of teaching him, as he’s better than she is at English

Oh my gosh, me too - this is peak mumsnet (bullshit)

[BanditoShipman]

@Justsawagecko

Thanks for all the positive and kind feedback. My worry wasn’t she was going to be a genius and I wasn’t thinking that way in the slightest. It was rather that her language, coupled with a few other behaviours I’ve been observing, just made me ponder (well, worry a bit tbh)
She also isn’t keen on loud sounds and although gets on well with her toddler peers, often seems confused by them. Just different behaviours I’ve noticed really…at play dates/friends houses/parties, she’s always the only child who wanders off all over the place, the others don’t seem to do that, she just sort of does her own thing, but is massively sociable, so it’s a bit confusing.

To a previous poster, I am an older mum too 🤣

My dd was like this, she has Aspergers. The aversion to loud sounds could be this but could also be Sensory Processing Disorder, or indeed could mean nothing at all.

[frazzledquaver]

OP I totally understand where you are coming from. And one of the things you'll need to learn is that you don't get much sympathy if you have bright kids. Even if you have concerns about neurodivergence, or just that they asynchronous with their peers. As others have said, keep an eye out for other markers, but your child may be just good at acquiring and using vocabulary. IRL I'm sure you are keeping any concerns you have about this to yourself. You would do well to. If there is one things people like more than taking down a parent who thinks their child is "more advanced", it's taking down the parent whose child is actually advanced.

[BearOfEasttown]

@Justsawagecko

Mine were the same. Both of them. Chatting like a child of 7 or 8 when they were 3. Playing video games, and using computers. When they were 8-9, they had a reading age of 14. They were articulate and intelligent as children. Still are in their 20s, and have been high achievers at college, uni, and in their careers.

It's pretty great as I know they will always be OK. But there's nothing massively unusual about it, and it's nothing to 'worry' about. Many children are the same, especially girls.

[33feethighandrising]

My DS is autistic. He's also super smart, great company and an interesting, kind and loving human being. He has his quirks! But I wouldn't change him for the world.

Your DD does sound a bit like my DS when he was younger.

He's always much preferred the company of adults than children, and the ease at which he can talk to adults make some of them find it hard to accept he's autistic. They don't see how much he struggles (or, used to, anyway) with DC his own age.

He was always running off as a toddler and young child, I never got to sit and chat with the other mums, I was always chasing after him. (If I didn't, he'd just keep going and going! He really didn't care where I was!)

I suspected there was something different about him from a young age, but wasn't sure enough of my conviction, plus had some terrible advice from well meaning but ill-informed teachers and even a SENCO, and that stopped us going for diagnosis until he was 10. And by that point it was more obvious.

Your DD sounds lovely. She either is, or isn't autistic already. She is the same child you know, whether she's got ASD or not.

Have you heard the phrase, if you've met one person with autism, you've met one person with autism? It can affect people in myriad different ways. Some autistic people struggle to function in society without support. Others, like my mum, have fantastically successful careers - often in tech or the sciences which are full of ASD and ADHD people! (Many undiagnosed).

Sorry I'm rambling. I'm trying to say, I think you're right to be curious about whether your DD is autistic. But don't worry, even if she is, it's often not as scary as it may sound.

We thought a lot about whether to go for diagnosis and in the end we decided that especially as DS is a bright child, he deserved to have the words to describe what's going on in his own head. Which he now has, and he uses them well, he's able to explain to teachers why he finds things like metaphor difficult for example. (Not that they all understand!)

[ByeClare]

DS2’s GCSE English teacher told me she’d done an advanced A level course to make sure she was up to the job of teaching him, as he’s better than she is at English

@MarkRuffaloCrumble in hindsight, do you think the teacher might have been taking the piss?

[ViciousJackdaw]

My daughter was very much like this. Talking in proper sentences from 18 months

Well, they do say 'no' is a complete sentence, after all!

[redpontipine]

My son is like this his vocabulary and diction are extremely 'proper' and advanced. He also has a thirst for facts and knowledge. He is autistic and has adhd. High functioning (q. Aspergers) it's all there in the head, a fun crazy random encyclopaedia but he cannot tell you what he did two hours ago and unfortunately although it's all up there somewhere it's not coming out on paper for school, I.e cannot work out 1 + 2 (aged 7) he will however tell you who was king in 1642 and what precisely happened to the mummy's in Egypt.
Because he sounds so intelligent out loud he doesn't get the help he so desperately needs which is sad.
If you have genuine thoughts there may be something else going out definitely speak to a professional as if this is the case the quicker you get the ball rolling for help and support the better

[Justsawagecko]

@33feethighandrising Thanks so much, your post made me feel a bit emotional, what is the wandering off thing do you think? She fire it less now, but can still go off exploring where she’s not supposed to and when younger, would just walk for miles with me following her! She’s amazing, but I’m exhausted pretty much all the time. Her peers seem more chilled or something. She doesn’t seem to have any problems with socialising though and will just walk up to anyone and say hello, which I was pleased about as I was very shy as a child.

[TwoLeftSocksWithHoles]

@Pieceofpurplesky

'brilliant politician' - isn't that an oxymoron?

[Toddlerteaplease]

I met a three year old who would say 'what a palaver' it was hilarious!

[skodadoda]

@Justsawagecko

My toddler Dd. She’s almost 3 but has crazy vocabulary..using words like ‘Absolutely’ ‘Broadcasting’ ‘Besides’ etc. She hears something and it just seems to stick in her mind, she knows what it means too. Ever since she was around 1.5, her language just took off and we’ve had normal conversations ever since. She crawled & walked fairly late, but just seems so attuned to things and like an older child in a toddlers body in many ways. It worries me for the future, is this normal?

OP, I’m 72 and have DC of 40+, and grandchildren of course. DS walked late but talked like yours at 2. Seemed to teach himself to read. He’s perfectly normal, police officer now.
DD was similar and is a lawyer. I think the answer is that DC are either verbal or physical. Don’t worry. Just engage with her but bear in mind that she’s only 3.

[Bottleup]

Sounds very much like my daughter OP. Astonishing vocabulary before the age of 2, and struggled to play with children her age. Diagnosed with ASD. Happy and thriving and fantastic at creative writing. But do keep an eye because girls who present this way are often overlooked.

[Justsawagecko]

@frazzledquaver Thank you 💐

[ByeClare]

OP, my DC was like this too at that age. Has always been very articulate for their age. Diagnosed with autism and ADHD as a teen. Still a teen and although their vocabulary is very good I don't think it's exceptionally high, unless you're talking about SM lexicon

[LunaAndHer3Stars]

@NCjourno

Meh.. I was reading the Guardian upside down at that age.

I didn't amount to much.

Me too 🤣.

I've got my own humble brag. Our eldest was like this, but I'll raise you a younger sibling who can do maths 4 years ahead, in his head.

[me4real]

That does sounds a bit of a boast. Everyone is different with different strengths and weaknesses.

I'm told I had an awesome vocabulary as a child, but got more thick and mentally ill with age.

Even if she does turn out to have ADHD and/or ASD, she obviously has some talents, which being neurodivergent might even add to.

Someone can have traits of ADHD or ASD without having the whole disorder, and their traits can still have a marked effect.

[Justsawagecko]

@Bottleup In what way did she struggle to play with them? Were there any kther signs early on?

[Justsawagecko]

*Other

[Justsawagecko]

@me4real It wasn’t meant to be a boast

[LaProcureure]

All my kids are like that. It doesn’t worry me for the future, quite the reverse…

[LunaAndHer3Stars]

FWIW all our DC are Autistic. They're all smart and each has an area they're very good at. Youngest is also well ahead of his class in a couple of areas. It's all a bit meh to me, they're who they are. They're quirky and smart, not 2E or gifted. 2E is twice exceptional a term for neuro diverse children who are also gifted.