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AIBU?

...to think that bringing your morning coffee to church is a bit inappropriate?

399 replies

NannyPlumsSnarkyWand · 20/06/2021 09:43

I'm pretty sure I'm just being a judgy old gimmer - thought a Sunday morning AIBU thrashing would be in order.

Just passed a group of school mums as they were coming back from church. They were all carrying portable coffee flasks and sipping from them.

I mean, yes I understand the need for coffee in the morning, but part of me thought - is there really such a pressing need to bring your coffee to a formal church service? Can you really not go a whole hour (less actually) without coffee? And then there's something just a bit odd about it. You're going to church, not the theatre, I don't know - my experience of church services is formal. It would have been seen as inappropriate to bring coffee - you have your tea and coffee after the service - but then as I say, maybe I'm just an old gimmer. Is this normal at church now?

So just to caveat this - no, it doesn't occupy a great deal of my thoughts; yes, I do have other more important things to worry about; yes I do have friends; no, I'm not judging their worth as people based on whether they drink coffee during the service or not, I just had a passing thought and wondered what others thought.

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

1622 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
62%
You are NOT being unreasonable
38%
lemonsyellow · 20/06/2021 10:06

Surely it’s because offering tea and coffee after the service in the church hall isn’t allowed now because of covid. Aren’t people told to bring their own flasks?

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hookiewookie29 · 20/06/2021 10:07

YANBU. I can't understand this need of people to have to have something to drink,or eat, everywhere they go- the theatre, church, the cinema.... you're only there for a couple of hours, you're not going to die of thirst or hunger!

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shouldistop · 20/06/2021 10:07

@HoldingTheDoor Grin in normal times our church has bbqs, bacon rolls etc. Thursday film nights with pizzas. All sorts of stuff for all ages.

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NannyPlumsSnarkyWand · 20/06/2021 10:07

@TheKeatingFive

Well i once saw a woman hand out home made cookies during communion, so nothing would surprise me now.

Hilarious!!!!
OP posts:
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Confuzzled12345 · 20/06/2021 10:07

You are being unreasonable... Maybe attend the church to find what goes on? You might like it ☺️

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HoldingTheDoor · 20/06/2021 10:08

@HoldingTheDoor in normal times our church has bbqs, bacon rolls etc. Thursday film nights with pizzas. All sorts of stuff for all ages.

That sounds amazing! I'm in.

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KatherineOfGaunt · 20/06/2021 10:09

@hookiewookie29

YANBU. I can't understand this need of people to have to have something to drink,or eat, everywhere they go- the theatre, church, the cinema.... you're only there for a couple of hours, you're not going to die of thirst or hunger!

OP wasn't in church so had no evidence they were drinking during the service. She saw them afterwards.
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autumnboys · 20/06/2021 10:09

There’s no requirement to fast before Communion in the COE and not every service includes it, even more so at the moment.

We switched to asking people to bring their own cups several years ago for eco reasons. We’re not serving drinks at all at the moment, but people are welcome to bring their own. When we had two back to back services pre covid with coffee in between, it was perfectly normal for the second service people to bring their coffee into the service.

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osbertthesyrianhamster · 20/06/2021 10:09

I couldn't leave the house without coffee. But I don't believe in God so never have to worry about taking coffee to church.

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Confuzzled12345 · 20/06/2021 10:10

God doesn't care as long as you are there 😉

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PhilCornwall1 · 20/06/2021 10:10

What else is there to do in church?

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saleorbouy · 20/06/2021 10:11

I'm with you on this one, adults seem to have become like young children these days and tend to have a need to carry a coffee or a bottle of water constantly to sign from.
What's wrong with just having a good drink and carrying on for an hour or so before another?

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RockingMyFiftiesNot · 20/06/2021 10:12

@Confuzzled12345

God doesn't care as long as you are there 😉

Exactly this. And not particularly Christian to be judging people who choose to worship in their own way.
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Jellybabiesforbreakfast · 20/06/2021 10:13

More likely Jesus knows the real reason they are there to work the school system

More fool us for having a state-funded education system where you can 'earn' advantage for your child through religious attendance.

Three of the four primary schools within walking distance of us (outstanding/good) are CofE/Catholic and prioritise religious applications. The other one (good) we're likely to be out of catchment for. I sometimes feel like writing to the Department for Education and asking for my tax money back.

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MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 20/06/2021 10:13

So just to caveat this - no, it doesn't occupy a great deal of my thoughts; yes, I do have other more important things to worry about; yes I do have friends; no, I'm not judging their worth as people based on whether they drink coffee during the service or not, I just had a passing thought and wondered what others thought

If I ever dare start a thread in AIBU, I think I will include the above disclaimer

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RandomLondoner · 20/06/2021 10:14

They're only going to church to get their child into a school, and have no idea what normal church behaviour is. I've seldom been to church in my adult life, but the one time I went, I vaguely recall it being explained how to behave, because a lot of people attending didn't know. (Attendance at the church could give access to the best state primary school in a London borough.)

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lap90 · 20/06/2021 10:14

@Themostwonderfultimeoftheyear

At our church in the family services it is very informal. It is expected that young children will have drinks with them and often snacks. Children run around most of the service and noone would bat an eyelid at anyone sipping from a drink in the service whether child or adult. Not all church services are formal.

Exactly.

I recall once visiting a Church which served coffee and doughnuts before the service shock horror.
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Lalliella · 20/06/2021 10:15

Did Jesus ever say in the bible not to take coffee to church? No. He did say not to judge others though.

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LynetteScavo · 20/06/2021 10:15

If you saw this this morning it was quite an early service. I'd be unleashing my flask on the way out too!

What would Jesus do? He'd use an eco friendly flask and drink only fair trade coffee. I don't think he'd be bothered about anyone drinking it on the church path on the way out.

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iklboo · 20/06/2021 10:16

They're only going to church to get their child into a school, and have no idea what normal church behaviour is.

Know them personally do you?

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Themostwonderfultimeoftheyear · 20/06/2021 10:16

@hookiewookie29

YANBU. I can't understand this need of people to have to have something to drink,or eat, everywhere they go- the theatre, church, the cinema.... you're only there for a couple of hours, you're not going to die of thirst or hunger!

It's more about breaking bread (or biscuits) together as a congregation. Food and drink are used to bring people together in all sorts of communities.
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shouldistop · 20/06/2021 10:16

@RandomLondoner why would you assume that? They were drinking coffee on the way out the door, my minister wouldn't care about that. Actually he wouldn't care if you fancied a drink in church either.
I go to church, I'm in Scotland and we're not Catholic so it's nothing to do with schools. My kids will go to the catchment school.

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BuggerOffAndGoodDayToYou · 20/06/2021 10:17

Well my friends and I always head straight to the coffee shop over the road from church for coffee and sometimes more. We are RC so not allowed to eat or drink for an hour before mass and the the service is an hour (much, much shorter now due to covid restrictions) so a drink was very welcome. A couple of times a month there would also be drinks and sausage / bacon sandwiches in the hall after mass.

Maybe the group of friends you saw weren’t even going home but heading out for a walk together.

Nothing wrong with drinking your coffee AFTER the service.

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mam0918 · 20/06/2021 10:17

You have tea and coffee afterwards so hardly an inappropriate drink, its not like they're swilling vodka or downing the whole bottle of the blood of christ.

I mean whose to say they are sipping it mid prayer? surely just having it is no different than having your handbag with you or your phone in your pocket. I see many people outside of church walking away with their phones out but I highly doubt they where play candy crush during the service.

I have taken drinks into church before because I have a life before and after and sometime Im thirsty on the way to church and I have figured a magical way to teleport the bottle of water home when I get to the church doors.

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shouldistop · 20/06/2021 10:18

It funny that from a quick scan of the thread, the posters judging the women are not regular church goers.

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