What would you do if an adult hit your child

[Breadcheesebread]

Without going into too many details.

Two 6 month olds were playing, one ended up hitting the other on the hand, accidentally.
Neither reacted, carried on playing.

The mother of the one who was hit, said 'I saw that' and lightly tapped the hand of the child who had hit her child.
She then turned to her own child and asked if she was OK. Her child stared blankly at her.

The poor kid who had just been hit by the adult looked so confused.
The mother of the one that hit his friend accidentally was so shocked she didn't say anything.

If it was my child, it would take all my strength not to slap the woman.

Or is that unreasonable?

[PhilCornwall1]

If someone hit either of my two, they'd be waking up in hospital, after having their teeth removed from their arse.

[Underhisi]

Move away, don't you ever touch my child again and I would be wondering how they treat their own child in private.

[Mummyoflittledragon]

I’d probably react in the same way as the mum, whose baby’s hand was tapped. Then I’d be very wary of this person.

[Jellybabiesforbreakfast]

I'd assume that the woman who tapped the baby's hand was having mental health issues and could do with seeking help. Maybe PND or PTSD, though I've never really heard of it manifesting in this way.

When my DC was around 2-3 months old, they went through a stage of not sleeping for more than around 20 minutes at a time. I'm not proud of it but I was so tired and fed-up that I really quite disliked them sometimes. Once when they'd been crying for hours, I screamed at them to leave me alone. I definitely started attributing evil intent where there was just a tired baby who needed comfort. Luckily, this stage didn't last long. I was also hallucinating about other things as well. When I look back, it's clear that I wasn't well and could have done with some help.

If I was the other child's mother, I wouldn't want this person near my child unsupervised since I'd be concerned about her mental state.

[randomlyLostInWales]

I'd point out it was inappropriate reaction both babies are way to young to understand or to actaully be palying together - then if this parent can't be avoided be close enough to intervene in future.

I've had to watch mutiple DC at toddler groups/ playgrounds because other children do hit out and some parents are batshit snaching toys of children because their child wants it or worse.

[NameyNameyNameChangey]

I'd be hard pressed not to hit her on her hand and then ask my baby if they were OK...

Seriously, though, that's nuts. I'd back off that friendship.

[ineedaholidaynow]

For those saying a tap is the same as a smack, does that include when someone taps you lightly on your shoulder to get your attention. I've done that if we have been in a noisy place and DH wasn't able to hear me. Does that mean I have hit him?

[NumberTheory]

The mum who hit the 6 month old is totally out of order. But for you to slap her in retaliation would have been a reaction based in exactly the same moronic instincts and with a worse impact (more significant violence in front of the children with he potential to turn into an all out brawl).

I would have told the mother that her response was pointless and unacceptable and, depending on her reaction to that, possibly left and not seen her again.

There’s no point in making something that was in principle really bad but the effect on that occasion was just to leave a small baby confused for a few minutes into a huge drama (and especially not into a drama that would cause more damage to the babies than had been done). Just draw the boundaries that need drawing and decide if you need to distance to ensure them.

[shouldistop]

For those saying a tap is the same as a smack, does that include when someone taps you lightly on your shoulder to get your attention. I've done that if we have been in a noisy place and DH wasn't able to hear me. Does that mean I have hit him?

[lightningpeach]

OP Who was the other mum (the tapper) to you? Was she a friend or someone you don't know.
Even if it was just a tap, no one else has the right to chastise your baby. I'd be telling her very sternly exactly that and removing my baby. If it was a friend i'd be sure she understood that or wouldn't be seeing her again.

[DarcyLewis]

@ineedaholidaynow

For those saying a tap is the same as a smack, does that include when someone taps you lightly on your shoulder to get your attention. I've done that if we have been in a noisy place and DH wasn't able to hear me. Does that mean I have hit him?

When people “tap” children on the hand or leg or bottom as a punishment, they aren’t trying to get their attention. They want to shock or hurt the child so they associate the unpleasant feeling with the action they’ve been punished for.
If you are tapping your DH to hurt or shock him to teach him a lesson, then yes it’s a hit.

[MustardRose]

There's a big difference between a hit, a smack and a light tap, it seems to me that the person patted the baby's hand to get their attention, not to hurt them. But what do I know, I wasn't there.

[KurtWilde]

Pick my baby up, say to the adult 'if you ever lay a finger on my baby again you'll be spitting your teeth out,' and leave.

[touma]

At 6 months old babies are still working on their hand-eye coordination, and can accidentally "hit" people or things.

I would have absolutely had to say something. Whoever it was is a disgrace.

Poor baby.

[KnobJockey]

Off thread but @Ozanj you have weight issues. 6 month old babies that are bigger are 'overweight' but smaller are 'lower centile/underweight'- clear bias there towards bigger babies. Babies are babies. There are higher centile and lower centiles for a reason, because they aren't all born on 7lb on the dot and follow a 50% line.

If I heard you call my 99th centile weight and height baby overweight while working in childcare, there would be a written complaint in about you to the nursery manager. Some people are bigger/ taller/broader than others, and it's not your place to judge them.

[Longtimeagonow46]

If someone hurt my child in any way whatsoever I'd not be able to control myself. Any parent would be the same, I'm certain!

[lastcall]

I'd have absolutely kicked off and told her in no uncertain terms that her behaviour was unacceptable and that if she ever touched my baby/child in such a manner again you'd be calling the authorities. Completely wrong move ... and then to 'show ask' her BABY if baby was ok. FFS. What a deluded loon.

Imagine hitting a baby for something ... they have no idea about any of it!

[bigbaggyeyes]

I don't care wether it's a hit or a tap on the hand, I'd have said something pretty strongly worded to the other parent.

[CovidCorvid]

I would spell out in words of one syllable why she was bat shit crazy and why I'd never be seeing her or her child again. I'd take my baby and go. I'd suggest she takes some parenting courses and takes the stick out her arse.

Blimey if she's like this with accidental collisions from babies God knows what she will be like by the time it's full on toddlers hitting each other season!

There was a mum at dd's school who came steaming into the playground once and got dd's friend and dd pinned up against the wall....mainly dd's friend but dd was caught up in it. While screaming at dd's friend that if she didn't play nicely with her dd in the future she was going to "fucking batter her". I called the police who went round and gave her what for.

[NumberTheory]

@Longtimeagonow46

If someone hurt my child in any way whatsoever I'd not be able to control myself. Any parent would be the same, I'm certain!

People spout this sort of thing as though it makes them sound like noble tigers protecting their pups, but it is not at all helpful to over react and can be very detrimental. It’s pathetic for an adult not to be able to control themselves for the benefit of their children.

[VeganVeal]

WTF? Who beats a six month old baby? I'd report her OP

[Longtimeagonow46]

@NumberTheory
It doesn't matter what you think to be honest. I don't just 'spout' things to sound like anything. If someone hit my child then yes I'd be beyond raging. I'm not the only person on the thread that has expressed a similar feeling to this effect. Whether you agree or don't agree or don't like what I say is totally irrelevant to me.

[knittingaddict]

@VeganVeal

WTF? Who beats a six month old baby? I'd report her OP

Beats? Really?

[NameyNameyNameChangey]

@VeganVeal

WTF? Who beats a six month old baby? I'd report her OP

"Beats" is slightly hysterical, isn't it?

[Sawyersfishbiscuits]

A friend did this to my kitten! I went nuclear. If it happened to my child I'd absolutely lose it.