What would you do if an adult hit your child

[Breadcheesebread]

Without going into too many details.

Two 6 month olds were playing, one ended up hitting the other on the hand, accidentally.
Neither reacted, carried on playing.

The mother of the one who was hit, said 'I saw that' and lightly tapped the hand of the child who had hit her child.
She then turned to her own child and asked if she was OK. Her child stared blankly at her.

The poor kid who had just been hit by the adult looked so confused.
The mother of the one that hit his friend accidentally was so shocked she didn't say anything.

If it was my child, it would take all my strength not to slap the woman.

Or is that unreasonable?

[whoopsnomore]

Some people do still unfortunately think this is a sensible and effective way to teach children (and babies!) what's right and what's not acceptable. Given that she didn't hit to hurt, and the baby was nonplussed, I would have spoken to the other adult very firmly and told them they should not have done that, have no right to do so, and must never do it again (and that it's a misguided, damaging and outdated approach to raising a baby).

[Starlightstarbright1]

Most 6 months old aren't even crawling.. so no reason to sit so close together. It makes no sense to in current climate.

They also are not hitting just hitting out waving arms.

[HereWeGoAgainRoundAndRound]

6 months old don't even know what they are doing with there hands half of the time, some people have gone mad 🤦🏼‍♀️

[TheWaif]

If someone actually got my six month old baby I would probably literally rip their throat out with my bare hands.

In the situation you describe I would pick my baby up, leave and never speak to her again.

[TheWaif]

*hit

[HeronLanyon]

Well if my baby really did just ‘look confused’ and carried on playing I’d ask that woman not to do that again and never to hit a baby as punishment. I’d keep it quiet so that neither baby became anxious about anything.
If I were in a playgroup type setting which might be repeated I’d not ever let my baby be looked after by her again - I’d guess as they get older so too her hits will become harder.
If this is a family member I’d be cautious about her being with my baby/children unless I became more comfortable.
Not good.

[Thefaceofboe]

I would go apeshit if someone actually hit my 6m old baby, but not lightly tapping their hand.

[Bluntness100]

In the context given and ignoring the title I’d think she wasn’t very well. A six month old doesn’t have intent to hit, and her hitting back and then asking if the baby was ok is just really odd behaviour. To be honest I’d be concerned about her and if I wasn’t close I’d stay away.

[TotorosCatBus]

I'd be furious and would leave/ask her to leave depending on whose home in was. If it was a friend then I wouldn't be seeing them any more with my baby.
Are the 6 month olds even mobile ? Assuming that they aren't I'd say that it was the adults fault that they were within grabbing distance of each other.

[MagnoliaBeige]

I’d probably be shocked in the moment, say nothing and kick myself afterwards, I’d hope at the time I’d have told her in strong terms to never touch my child again.

I strongly disagree with any form of smacking/tapping or whatever euphemism you want to use for physically reprimanding a child but you absolutely should NOT be doing it to a child who isn’t yours and who has no concept of what they’re being “tapped” for.

[Jumpingintosummer]

I would have said don’t lay a finger on my child and had nothing more to do with her as she’s clearly unhinged!

[me4real]

@Breadcheesebread I wouldn't say it's 'revenge' necessarily, maybe she thought it might help teach the child not to do it again.

That doesn't make it any better though, and probably wouldn't get through at that age anyway.

I think I would report this so whoever was in charge (if there is someone) so that the person doesn't do anything like that to a child there again.

[Redcrayons]

Light tap - most likely nothing
Hit - rip her head off.

[Karmagoat]

I would have tapped her round the face...with my fist

[Geamhradh]

Tapping the child who hit serves no purpose, but the other mother should have been keeping a much closer eye on her own child. Doesn't need a PhD in child development to know that babies of that age aren't going to sit still and think "if Eddie takes my big orange cube I still shouldn't wallop him" or, to be more precise still, the other child probably just randomly made their hand connect to Eddie in some way.
The mother who tapped was wrong.
The mother not watching her own child was also wrong.

[updownroundandround]

Storm in a teacup, that's all.

You said ''lightly tapped the hand of the child'', not hit.

There's a whole world of difference !

The parent did not injure the child.

I would've politely said to the parent ''I'm afraid it's unacceptable to touch another child unless it is to preserve their safety'', then moved my child away.

You're going to have lots of little 'events' like this as your child grows, the trick is to tackle them calmly and as rationally as you can.

E.g your child roughly pushes another (who then falls/is injured) during a game of rounders...............What will be 'appropriate' in that scenario ? You start shouting at the other child ? You 'demand action' from the school ? You ban your child from PE forever ? You tell your child 'sometimes sports can be rough' ?

Or another child pushes your child, who falls and starts crying during the egg and spoon race...........what's 'appropriate' in that scenario ?

Pick your battles wisely.

[updownroundandround]

Got myself confused in my examples, but you get the idea.

[LemonPeonies]

I would kick her in the face in all honesty.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

I'd report them for assault. Its a crime to smack your own child isn't it.
Let alone someone else's. Any smacking if it was still lawful the mother does it.

[shouldistop]

In what way were the 6 month old babies playing? I'm struggling to imagine my 6mo playing with another baby, he just laughs or squeals if someone looks at him and shakes a rattle.

[goldierocks]

I've got that sketch in my brain now where Blackadder and the Duke of Wellington are demonstrating the difference between a hard hit and a soft hit on the Prince Regent (who was pretending to be Blackadder).....

The difference between a 'tap' and a 'hit' would have determined my response. Neither would be left unchallenged.

[khakiandcoral]

@Awwlookatmybabyspider

I'd report them for assault. Its a crime to smack your own child isn't it.
Let alone someone else's. Any smacking if it was still lawful the mother does it.

no in the UK, it's not.

[knittingaddict]

@Breadcheesebread

Neither baby reacted to the hitting as they were playing and they just carried on playing.

And the tapping was done as revenge.

I disagree with you overdramatising as it was unnecessary. It wasn't a hit and it wasn't done as revenge (at least I don't think so). It sounds like a tap which probably didn't hurt the child and it was to teach the child a lesson, not revenge. I know this because I came from the generation in which this was done.

Having said all that, I strongly disagree with another parent doing this as it wasn't her place. Also the children were far too young for this to be of any benefit to anyone. I also think discipline has moved on some way in recent decades and physical discipline is completely unnecessary. For all those reasons I think the other mother was completely wrong.

You were also wrong to use over wrought language in your post. I'm sure many would have agreed with you without it.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

I'd say it was a first time mother.

Why are you making excuses up for her. Those of us with children have all been first time mothers.