To want a really small wedding? Cheap but fun ideas please!!

[Mumof3almost4]

We have decided to get married, both second weddings so church not an option. DP would like a big wedding but we have barely any money so can't.
I'd love a smaller wedding but I have no idea how to make it minimal but fun. Please can you send me your ideas and experiences?
Thank you!!

You should be able to get married in approved premises as well.

If you want the Irish family involved I'd look into churches in their area. The Unitarian church in Dublin is lovely, I've been to a couple of weddings there. You can have low key afters then with photos in the park and dinner at a restaurant, if that's what you want - loads of stuff on your doorstep!

Also I mention the Unitarians as while I know it's a second wedding for you, afaik the Unitarians aren't strict on this? I could be way off here as I'm not Unitarian myself.

Whichever registry office you choose, it'll be the same registrars who would marry you at a castle or manor house. They will do you a lovely ceremony wherever it is. However I think we paid £400 to get married at a town hall rather than the registry office, so it's not necessarily a fortune if you cast the net a bit wider.

Skip anything that's advertised by the Wedding Industry. My favourite wedding remains registry office in the morning, followed by a massive picnic, all guests brought a platter of something. This all happened during a street theatre festival, and since bride and groom were both well known supporters and volunteer helpers, they got a lot of free entertainment directed at them, including a stand up comedian doing a spoof extra wedding ceremony for them during the afternoon. It was fabulous!

I went to one wedding at a pub that had a bouncy castle, BBQ and a spontaneous game of rounders materialised. It was loads of fun!

Picnic. Friends hired a field in a scenic spot, put up a marquee,in case it rained, and a tent with chemical toilet. Lots of bunting. Had a big barbecue. Took picnic chairs and cricket set. Brilliant for family wedding party with children. Got married with just witnesses and then guests assembled in nearest village where were given directions to field and bride and groom waiting for them on arrival.

Had 30 people, married on a Friday - often much cheaper option. Local church (2nd time for us too) walked there so no car, did my own bouquet of simple white roses bound in ribbon. Own hair and makeup too. Beautiful dress which was reduced in sale from over a grand to less than half that. Back to a local manor house for champagne, buffet. No disco. Later on we had cheese platters and wedding cake (neighbour made at cost she's a baker). People left about 9pm. Next day did open house at home, all guests mucked in to make the food. Laid back day with food, booze out in the garden. On the Sunday we were back to the manor house for a big brunch for close family only. Cost me 3k but would probably be nearer 5k today.
Had a four day honeymoon in Paris on a deal.

You can cut the cost by limiting the length of the event and also the number of people you invite.

In your shoes I’d have a late afternoon / early evening ceremony and then a meal in a private room at a pub.

Monsoon gets recommendations for well priced wedding dresses. I wouldn’t pay fir a car or favours. A nice cake decorated with fresh flowers or a cake topper from Etsy. Friends and family to take photos.

I’d spend a lot of time on writing a really heartfelt speech about how I feel to be marrying my partner and how happy i was to share the day with the invited guests.
Pay for some nicer than usual bubbly for the toast.

Congrats and have a wonderful day whatever you choose

Best wedding I’ve ever been to was in a field too. A yurt and a childminder for the littles, a bbq a pile of drinks a fire to play guitar round. The thing that struck me was in the pub first, there was a very formal wedding party and everyone looked very stiff and un comfy in high heels that sunk into the grass. Our bride wore a lovely dress and wellies! And everyone seemed much more relaxed from the off set.

I don't know if it's in UK too, but last few weddings I was at in my native country, people hired out farmhouse type of building. They are usually into U or L shape with lots of space, bar area, kitchen rooms, barn or space for large gazebo etc. It's so great! Some people slept in rooms, some brought tents, tehre was fire and grill and guitars and dancing. Absolutely amazing atmosphere in the gardens and barns.
They are hired as they are for whole weekend. You decorate them and get your catering in. We always got in on Friday and prepped for Saturday wedding, had some drinks. Then on Sunday we helped clear up.
After mine, there are 2 of these farms which were my favourite weddings ever😁

Random farmhouse to illustrate

We just went to our local Italian Restaurant and enjoyed a good meal, plus champagne in the garden before.

What’s your location OP and realistic budget? And is it really about budget or number of guests?

If I had a couple of grand to spend and wanted a small in numbers wedding I’d probably look for a restaurant or pub in a good location that had a private room. Most places have minimum spend but don’t charge room hire. And private rooms are usually great if you have a few kids there. You can make a bit of a play area in the corner. You could do registry office before hand. Onto a different pub for evening drinks if you want to.

If it’s about a budget friendly and cheerful party wedding then registry office followed by village hall is probably the right idea. I would want outside catering though, if only because they would do most of the clearing up. But you could get something more relaxed like a hog roast or bbq.

Pay for some nicer than usual bubbly for the toast

I wouldn’t focus on price but we did a blind taste test with a few varieties from Majestic. Everything from french champagne to cava, Prosecco, etc. Ended up with a NZ sparkling which surprised me because I’m usually a bit of a snob about bubbles!

Depending on location, at our village hall we have hosted some great weddings. We have a really good bar (which can stay open late), and there are pizza, chip and other food vans that can be hired. Either decorate yourself, or get someone to do it. All day hire including bar (at cheap prices for under 100 you would still be quids in, and everyone would have a great time.

Totally outing, but our wedding cost c.6k (cheap compared to most, appreciate it's not 'cheap' per se). We had:

• village hall with wedding licence and bar (this was the biggest cost, about £3k IIRC);
• spotify playlists for disco, ceremony, background music (jazz etc.) whilst eating, borrowed the hall speakers, FIL found some disco lights in a skip ;
• bought dresses in the M&S sale (mine was £36, paid for the bridesmaids dresses, about £20-30 each). Said they could wear whatever shoes, accessories etc, they liked, I did pay for their hair, but not makeup (I didn't have mine done either);
• street food van, ice cream cart. Bought loads of salads, nibbles etc and laid them out in the hall, put some money behind the bar and water / wine on tables. People had to DIY their own tea / coffee from the kitchen, all laid out for them. Put cheese, fruit, quiche, sausage rolls etc. out in the evening, but tbh we had loads of food left over... I handed it out to relatives who had helped to take home
• decorations were tea lights in jam jars, flowers (bought 'buckets' of flowers from the florists and made them up ourselves - I have a lovely memory of the afternoon before the wedding, when random guests who were there already turned up to help set the hall up as they knew it was DIY and I looked up to see my aunties and some female friends arranging flowers and chatting in the sunshine, it was lovely), DIY bunting (made out of doilies and string - dead easy, looked nice), borrowed fairy lights, fake ivy from amazon;
• friend made the cake as a gift;
• we asked for photos instead of wedding presents, partly because I hate having my picture taken / staged photos and partly because people wanted to give something and I wouldn't ask for cash. We have some absolutely amazing pictures as a result. We gave prizes for the best ones.

It was hard work, but it was a lovely day. Had about 100 guests, including children, so fewer guests would bring costs down.

I did look at yurts in fields etc., but around here it was more than £6k (i.e. the whole cost of ours in the end) just to hire it and before you'd done anything else, plus a lot of places made you buy in to their (expensive) caterers etc.

Last one we attended was lovely - not very small but in a village hall rather than hotel - afternoon tea served on pretty, mismatched china with garden flowers in teapots - summer wedding obviously. Actual ceremony was in the nearby church.

We had 14 at our wedding including us and our DC. We originally booked a registry office but due to covid regulations ended up moving it to a church. We went to a local bistro cafe for afternoon tea and fizz afterwards. They kept us a corner and we had balloons and things. Then we went on to the local pub for drinks and the kids played outside. DH and I then went to a hotel by ourselves for the evening and had a meal and drinks just the two of us. It was perfect and everyone commented it was lovely and relaxed and one of the best weddings they had been to.

We were only 8 at our wedding, small country hotel (very low key and informal) and had a midday ceremony followed by drinks and then a three-course lunch in a private room. We left on honeymoon directly from there during the afternoon. It was perfect for us, we just had the people closest to us and a very intimate, relaxed and cheap day which caused nobody involved any stress. We stuck to our guns about making it what we wanted. Don’t get caught up in the wedding industry and tempted into something which you won’t be happy with - it’s your day to celebrate however you want to.

Location and budget would affect what you do. I know they are more restrictive on where you can legally get marrried in the UK. We got married on a beach, we had 18 people there including our own 3 children. Then we went to the pub for lunch.

I think the most expensive part of the whole thing was the rings, because unlike everything else they’re not for 1 day. Excluding those I think it was under AU$2000

We got married in an undecorated church in regular clothes, then had sandwiches and cake and champagne in the garden. My mum made the cake, the trays of sandwiches etc were from the M&S website. We just put them on a table and people helped themselves.

If you got married around 3pm then afternoon tea with vintage china is lovely. I got married in a castle, with horse and carriage, and had reception in medieval banqueting hall. It was fabulous but very expensive. If I married again I would offer afternoon tea with vintage china. Sandwich with crust cut off and cut into fingers, scone with jam and cream, selection of cup cakes. Pot of tea or coffee.

@Mumof3almost4

DP doesn't fancy a registry office. My family are all over in Ireland, I'm wondering if I could do something low-key there. If not maybe a pub would be good here

I don’t think most pubs here have a license for wedding ceremonies so you’re going to need some option for the legal bit. Once you start looking for venues with a license you typically start to get into wedding prices.

Limo and a chip shop

@Mumof3almost4

DP doesn't fancy a registry office. My family are all over in Ireland, I'm wondering if I could do something low-key there. If not maybe a pub would be good here

Our registry office was posh - marble staircase for photos, oak-panelled room for the ceremony. They’re not all grim, promise!